reparator: (Default)
C E R E A L I A ★ M O D S。 ([personal profile] reparator) wrote in [community profile] ioculus2015-03-07 10:20 am
Entry tags:

//TESTDRIVE7.0.EXE

//TESTDRIVE7.0.EXE

Mystery Science Theatre -3000


Welcome to Cerealia's latest attraction. In an effort to branch into other forms of entertainment, CERES has been slowly patching together films from various worlds to show in its brand new movie theater. So, grab a friend, sit back, and enjoy the newest batch of imported films with a nice bucket of popcorn. As you'll notice from the long line outside, it's the latest rage in the colony, and those tired of the same virtual battles in ViViD are eager to enjoy a little change in scenery.

For those eager to participate, you will find yourself being lead into the lobby by one of the many robotic theater employees. Showing today are five special films, and in the lobbies are various screens advertising them through the movie's digital avatar, Mnemosyne. Allow her to take you on a virtual tour of CERES' finest theatrical offerings.

(( P.S. no actual actors/actresses appear in any of the films. It's all done through advanced CGi-technology and voice acting. ))
"GOOD EVENING, MOVIE-GOERS. I AM MNEMOSYNE, YOUR GUIDE FOR THIS EVENING.

AS YOU CAN SEE, WE HAVE SEVERAL CONCESSIONS FOR YOU. PLEASE PARTAKE IN THE CONCESSIONS, BUT DO NOT MAKE A MESS. THE THEATER ROBOTS HAVE BEEN PROGRAMMED TO TAKE ACTION FOR LITTERING.

TONIGHT'S FILMS ARE THE MUCH LAUDED AND CRITICALLY ACCLAIMED FILMS HAND-PICKED BY JULIUS VINCERE:

MY PETITE EQUESTRIAN EXPERIENCE RATED A

LARGE ADVENTURER 7 RATED B

THE RETALIATORS: ERA OF RADICALON RATED C

DECEASE HARDER II RATED D

YARD-DOOR PEOPLE OF QUESTIONABLE MORALS RATED Z

PLEASE MAKE YOUR SELECTION AT THE BOOTHS IN THE FRONT OF THE LOBBY THEN FOLLOW THE DIRECTIONS TO THE APPROPRIATE THEATER. THANK YOU AND ENJOY YOUR EVENING."

//SCENARIOS.EXE
THEATER I
[ 00:00 ] MY PETITE EQUESTRIAN EXPERIENCE - RATED A

Advertised as a delightful tale of ponies discovering magic and friendship, this is a must-see! For adults that is. The ponies are killed within the first ten minutes, and then the rest of the run time is filled with a celebratory orgy of Roman-esque proportions. There are no mentions of ponies after the initial scene. They are neither seen nor mourned nor heard from. There are only naked, gyrating bodies as far as the eye can see.

If you manage to sit through the horror long enough, you will notice a certain something in between the moaning. Is that your face on one of the protags? Is it a beloved family member or a friend? You will find that spliced between the scenes are cherished and innocent childish memories now being soiled by passionate cries of pleasure. Enjoy the new memory, your poor, sweet summer child. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER II
[ 00:00 ] LARGE ADVENTURER 7 - RATED B

A touching tale of dealing with loss and more loss. This film is about a giant robot and his pet human that gets eradicated in the Third Robotic Genocide, leaving behind just a human carcass. The giant robot clings to the carcass and cries robotic tears until finally he chucks the carcass into a river full of carcasses and decides to go on a deep quest in search of cheese.

But spliced between this tale of woe, viewers will see images of themselves caught in a romantic memory. A first kiss, perhaps? A first love-making session? A first crush? A desired one will also have their face molded on top of all the carcasses as they flow away. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.

THEATER III
[ 00:00 ] THE RETALIATORS: ERA OF RADICALON - RATED C

Agent Dick Angry takes it upon himself to assemble a team of miscreant aliens to invade the hell out of "Planet Earth." The aliens include Zorn, an intelligent toaster; Crisis, a blue-skinned beauty that turns purple when she's aroused; Trish, a rogue miniature ficus with a criminal record; and General Cerealia, a handsome, ripped man who beats evil-doers with his laptop and who looks suspiciously like CERES' programmer, Elias.

This adventurous romp will feature the tragic memories of death interweaving with the destruction of the "Planet Earth." Those who attend will see first-hand the memories of their own worlds slowly being demolished before their eyes and all their loved ones screaming in agony. Then it'll loop itself again and again for the last hour of the film. Enjoy! This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER IV
[ 00:00 ] DECEASE HARDER II - RATED D

Jack McJack is a cop who is having none of your shit. In this action film, he will ride around on a velociraptor and go around punching evil-doers and detonating them with land mines. If you want all the violence in the world, this is the film for you. Watch as every second is filled with pointless explosions and every curse word in all the known languages in Cerealia.

Of course, spliced between every action scene will be every embarrassing moment of your life being played out for you and only you. Or is it? Start sweating and looking in every direction as you begin to wonder if everyone else can see that time you tripped and fell on your senpai almost kissing him (sacre bleu D= !)
BONUS - THEATER V
[ why:o'clock ] YARD-DOOR PEOPLE OF QUESTIONABLE MORALS - RATED Z

This is a touching film about tenderness and coming together to overcome obstacles and achieve greatness. The Yard-Door people run into danger when an evil megalord starts polluting the air with negative feelings. The Yard-Door people must band together and save the world through kindness. They will go and help their neighbors get across the street, rake up leaves from their lawns, donate canned food to the poor, and collect toys for children who do not have any.

While this film will draw tears from your eyes, you will see happy memories. The happiest that can be mustered. They will be spliced in with the scenes in the movie, occurring side-by-side with all the smiles and fuzzy feelings leaking off the screens. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.

Also, beware! This film contains the angriest of Theater Cleaning Robots. Dropping anything on the floor will result in a bit of a flogging with a wooden paddle and a robot calling you a dirty slut and claiming that you like it. Yes, BDSM robots will not take your bad behavior. You better bend over and start apologizing for being such a filthy, little theater-goer.
[ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with trigger-y or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the meme. ]

//RUN.EXE
Welcome to CEREALIA's seventh Test Drive Meme. For your convenience, we have compiled a post detailing everyone's arrival experience and a FAQ that should explain everything in more detail. Please read them thoroughly before playing. Thank you!


heartboop: (Nora: uuuuhhhhh...)

[personal profile] heartboop 2015-03-10 11:47 am (UTC)(link)
I still like to play go fish, if that makes you feel better?
shacklebreaker: (chained sword unsheathe)

[personal profile] shacklebreaker 2015-03-10 11:52 am (UTC)(link)
[Blackquill doesn't even look around, saying dismissively,] Don't interfere, Wright-dono. This duel is not yours.

[Which, true to form, he makes seem like a fight to the death instead of a... rather inappropriate reprimand over some spilled popcorn. Except...]

--Wright-dono?

[When did he get here? The split second he turns to look at Phoenix, the robot goes to strike him. Blackquill slashes lightning quick at the robot, and its paddle drops cleanly to the ground in two.]

Only a coward would attack when my attention is elsewhere! Let that be a warning.
beaconed: (054)

[personal profile] beaconed 2015-03-10 11:54 am (UTC)(link)
[ Jaune... gasps at that revelation. ]

Why didn't you ever tell me?! I love Go Fish!
heartboop: (Nora: leg breaking time!)

[personal profile] heartboop 2015-03-10 11:58 am (UTC)(link)
[GASPS TOO]

WHAT?! [hits his arm playfully, maybe a little too enthusiastically!] GET OUT! Why aren't we playing right now?!
Edited 2015-03-10 11:59 (UTC)
beaconed: (pic#8915945)

[personal profile] beaconed 2015-03-10 12:07 pm (UTC)(link)
!!! [ He loses his balance and falls down as he's hit. Owwie. ]

Because you're talking about frisbee and shuttleboard instead of a game you're supposed to like!

And I was too embarrassed to say it myself.
shacklebreaker: (smirking over shoulder)

[personal profile] shacklebreaker 2015-03-10 12:10 pm (UTC)(link)
[He's happy as long as she is, truthfully, so he'll give her a moment. Evidently she didn't expect to see him here any time soon, and he realises this must be a shock to her.]
heartboop: (Nora: heeeeeey boo~)

[personal profile] heartboop 2015-03-10 12:10 pm (UTC)(link)
[Oops! Jaune, stop being so frail! That was just a love tap!

Nora offers a hand to him, and an apologetic smile.]

Now that we sorted it out, lets get it started! I won't go easy on you, though!
beaconed: (Default)

[personal profile] beaconed 2015-03-10 12:22 pm (UTC)(link)
[ A love tap from a girl who wields Magnhild. It's ok, though, he's used to this! He just accepts her hand as if nothing even happened. ]

Good! I don't want you saying you were easy on me when I inevitably beat you.
heartboop: (Nora: heeeeeey boo~)

[personal profile] heartboop 2015-03-10 12:25 pm (UTC)(link)
[....yyyeeeaaahhhhh....there was a lot of manhandling growing up, surely.]

PFFFFT! You lost a bet and wore a dress to the dance. I dunno if you'll beat me at Go Fish!
maple_syrup_can: hii101 ([fils] solved the code)

[personal profile] maple_syrup_can 2015-03-10 12:33 pm (UTC)(link)
If it's all right with you, then.

[With a slight and shy gentlemanly bow, he motions for her to precede him towards the door.]

Haa, to be fair though... [He makes his voice even softer (sorry if it's hard to hear him)] Maybe it was the people in charge of those movies who were embarrassing us. We didn't embarrass ourselves...
niceguypose: (talking)

[personal profile] niceguypose 2015-03-10 12:34 pm (UTC)(link)
[He's not the best person for the technological details at least.]

Y-yes that is frightening, isn't it? Don't worry, I'll protect you! [He says that with blind determination as they find the seats. He has just popcorn so he's pretty set, and he casually munches a bit at some of them.]
beaconed: (objection)

[personal profile] beaconed 2015-03-10 12:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Th-that was different! Anyone would bet that Pyrrha would land a date to the dance, it was the obvious choice!
heartboop: (Nora: skeptical)

[personal profile] heartboop 2015-03-10 12:44 pm (UTC)(link)
It wasn't that obvious if it got you in a dress that wasn't the best color for you! But we did such a great service on the dance floor that no one noticed!

[But her.]
beaconed: (positive)

[personal profile] beaconed 2015-03-10 01:05 pm (UTC)(link)
[ It's not the color that was the issue here, Nora!! ]

Hah! Well, at least my shoes complimented it, if that was the only critique.
Edited 2015-03-10 13:45 (UTC)
firstcloud: (06_even in the night when storms shall r)

[personal profile] firstcloud 2015-03-10 01:31 pm (UTC)(link)
[ That's a face he's been missing. Among those of his descendants that he's met, Kagemitsu thinks Soramaru to be the sanest (but then again, he's only met him and Tenka) ---almost as sane as Sousei seem to be. Except Sousei is apparently as immature as a Kumou, from what he has gathered. ]

Soramaru?

[ He's not imagining things like he did another time, right? This is a real one and not an illusion, right? This really is Soramaru, right? ]

Are you alright?
topscores: (pic#8037438)

[personal profile] topscores 2015-03-10 02:02 pm (UTC)(link)
[You have no idea, Murasaki...

But regardless of whether he can afford it or not, he's going to stuff his face with more popcorn before wanting to speak again because he's also a pig on top of all this:
]

Well, yeah. It's probably the most fun I've had since getting here.

[Maybe he's exaggerating.

...

But he'll hold out the bag, if Murasaki wants some too. Awww how sweet
]
psycholawgy: (i love you; you love me)

[personal profile] psycholawgy 2015-03-10 02:27 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Okay, deep breaths. She's gone through some rough times, but this is actually a good thing for her! Breathe, Athena, breathe.

When she snaps out of daydream land, she asks: ]


Are you going to watch a movie? What about a tour of the city instead? Do you have an apartment? I live in a flat with Ryuko! Oh, I met her on my first day here, and we became friends! She's like a real sister to me now. I think we have a spare room and you can take that, but if you don't want it, you should totally live across the hall!

[ It was definitely a mouthful, but can you blame her? ]
punchesyu: (where is that stupid bear)

[personal profile] punchesyu 2015-03-10 02:30 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, I am. Sorry, there's so many people around here that you don't really know who's who. [Seriously Maribelle prime example]

Actually, you're the first person here that isn't one of my friends that I've met who's Japanese. You can call me Yosuke.
allfortheclan: (♊ perhaps this is a concern)

[personal profile] allfortheclan 2015-03-10 02:37 pm (UTC)(link)
[ OW, little brother.

That question makes it clear something is off; Soramaru doesn't joke about much, and certainly not about serious things. ]


Soramaru... what's the last thing you remember?
punchesyu: (it was so gr8)

1/2

[personal profile] punchesyu 2015-03-10 02:37 pm (UTC)(link)
[She took his arm oh my god she actually did. She's not even laughing at him. Is he dreaming? He's gotta be. Who cares he's totally escorting this really cute girl around!]

[He leads her to what he thinks is the door to the management's office. Okay Yosuke, don't screw this up! So he clears his throat and politely knocks on the door a few times, waiting patiently for someone to answer the door.]
punchesyu: (good reason to be worried imo)

2/2

[personal profile] punchesyu 2015-03-10 02:37 pm (UTC)(link)
Uhhhhh....?

[Much to his dismay, it opens to reveal yet another robot- this one is wearing a tie, but also wielding one of the wooden paddles that the BSDM bots in the theater were also carrying around.]

STATE YOUR BUSINESS.
punchesyu: (SHE'S GOT A KID??????)

[personal profile] punchesyu 2015-03-10 02:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah! We can-

WHAT?? When the hell did you figure that out??? [Yosuke wouldn't even think to try to summon his persona here there hasn't been a need for it yet!]

[personal profile] arcanaofdeath 2015-03-10 02:42 pm (UTC)(link)
[Isn't patience supposed to be a virtue? Though having to listen to two people go back and forth on drink and food orders would be testing anyone's patience, wouldn't it?

Pharos points into the direction of the machine, not looking away from Tiera and the cashier (who seems to do an interpretive dance of the "Please don't take away my customer because I'm in dire need of more money" kind.)

Amusing.]


It's just around the corner.
punchesyu: (angreh words)

[personal profile] punchesyu 2015-03-10 02:44 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah! You think we want to watch all our friends dying?!

[The robot only stares back at the two of them, with the most deadpan of robot looks. So, like how they look normally.]

Shut that crap off-

[SLAM. The robot slams the door in their faces again. There's the sound of robotic steps going up a stairway, like they were just leaving...]
bozu: (And jalapeños onto skewers)

sorry about disappearing, was messing with coding!

[personal profile] bozu 2015-03-10 02:47 pm (UTC)(link)
Ahh, what a handsome name! And it's a pleasure to meet you as well, of course. It's not often I meet someone who shares my passion with food, you know what I mean?

It's refreshing, to say the least!

[And then he pauses, just for a moment, to consider something -]

... You know, we've been getting rather friendly in the middle of the theater's lobby.
Would you like to join me somewhere else, or perhaps watch one of these movies together?
It may have to go snackless, but... I could always make up for that later with a well prepared meal, of course.