//TESTDRIVE7.0.EXE

[reparator]

//TESTDRIVE7.0.EXE Mystery Science Theatre -3000 Welcome to Cerealia's latest attraction. In an effort to branch into other forms of entertainment, CERES has been slowly patching together films from various worlds to show in its brand new movie theater. So, grab a friend, sit back, and enjoy the newest batch of imported films with a nice bucket of popcorn. As you'll notice from the long line outside, it's the latest rage in the colony, and those tired of the same virtual battles in ViViD are eager to enjoy a little change in scenery. For those eager to participate, you will find yourself being lead into the lobby by one of the many robotic theater employees. Showing today are five special films, and in the lobbies are various screens advertising them through the movie's digital avatar, Mnemosyne. Allow her to take you on a virtual tour of CERES' finest theatrical offerings. (( P.S. no actual actors/actresses appear in any of the films. It's all done through advanced CGi-technology and voice acting. )) "GOOD EVENING, MOVIE-GOERS. I AM MNEMOSYNE, YOUR GUIDE FOR THIS EVENING. AS YOU CAN SEE, WE HAVE SEVERAL CONCESSIONS FOR YOU. PLEASE PARTAKE IN THE CONCESSIONS, BUT DO NOT MAKE A MESS. THE THEATER ROBOTS HAVE BEEN PROGRAMMED TO TAKE ACTION FOR LITTERING. TONIGHT'S FILMS ARE THE MUCH LAUDED AND CRITICALLY ACCLAIMED FILMS HAND-PICKED BY JULIUS VINCERE: MY PETITE EQUESTRIAN EXPERIENCE RATED A LARGE ADVENTURER 7 RATED B THE RETALIATORS: ERA OF RADICALON RATED C DECEASE HARDER II RATED D YARD-DOOR PEOPLE OF QUESTIONABLE MORALS RATED Z PLEASE MAKE YOUR SELECTION AT THE BOOTHS IN THE FRONT OF THE LOBBY THEN FOLLOW THE DIRECTIONS TO THE APPROPRIATE THEATER. THANK YOU AND ENJOY YOUR EVENING."

//SCENARIOS.EXE THEATER I [ 0000 ] MY PETITE EQUESTRIAN EXPERIENCE - RATED A Advertised as a delightful tale of ponies discovering magic and friendship, this is a must-see! For adults that is. The ponies are killed within the first ten minutes, and then the rest of the run time is filled with a celebratory orgy of Roman-esque proportions. There are no mentions of ponies after the initial scene. They are neither seen nor mourned nor heard from. There are only naked, gyrating bodies as far as the eye can see. If you manage to sit through the horror long enough, you will notice a certain something in between the moaning. Is that your face on one of the protags? Is it a beloved family member or a friend? You will find that spliced between the scenes are cherished and innocent childish memories now being soiled by passionate cries of pleasure. Enjoy the new memory, your poor, sweet summer child. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself. THEATER II [ 0000 ] LARGE ADVENTURER 7 - RATED B A touching tale of dealing with loss and more loss. This film is about a giant robot and his pet human that gets eradicated in the Third Robotic Genocide, leaving behind just a human carcass. The giant robot clings to the carcass and cries robotic tears until finally he chucks the carcass into a river full of carcasses and decides to go on a deep quest in search of cheese. But spliced between this tale of woe, viewers will see images of themselves caught in a romantic memory. A first kiss, perhaps? A first love-making session? A first crush? A desired one will also have their face molded on top of all the carcasses as they flow away. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself. THEATER III [ 0000 ] THE RETALIATORS: ERA OF RADICALON - RATED C Agent Dick Angry takes it upon himself to assemble a team of miscreant aliens to invade the hell out of "Planet Earth." The aliens include Zorn, an intelligent toaster; Crisis, a blue-skinned beauty that turns purple when she's aroused; Trish, a rogue miniature ficus with a criminal record; and General Cerealia, a handsome, ripped man who beats evil-doers with his laptop and who looks suspiciously like CERES' programmer, Elias. This adventurous romp will feature the tragic memories of death interweaving with the destruction of the "Planet Earth." Those who attend will see first-hand the memories of their own worlds slowly being demolished before their eyes and all their loved ones screaming in agony. Then it'll loop itself again and again for the last hour of the film. Enjoy! This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself. THEATER IV [ 0000 ] DECEASE HARDER II - RATED D Jack McJack is a cop who is having none of your shit. In this action film, he will ride around on a velociraptor and go around punching evil-doers and detonating them with land mines. If you want all the violence in the world, this is the film for you. Watch as every second is filled with pointless explosions and every curse word in all the known languages in Cerealia. Of course, spliced between every action scene will be every embarrassing moment of your life being played out for you and only you. Or is it? Start sweating and looking in every direction as you begin to wonder if everyone else can see that time you tripped and fell on your senpai almost kissing him (sacre bleu D= !) BONUS - THEATER V [ whyo'clock ] YARD-DOOR PEOPLE OF QUESTIONABLE MORALS - RATED Z This is a touching film about tenderness and coming together to overcome obstacles and achieve greatness. The Yard-Door people run into danger when an evil megalord starts polluting the air with negative feelings. The Yard-Door people must band together and save the world through kindness. They will go and help their neighbors get across the street, rake up leaves from their lawns, donate canned food to the poor, and collect toys for children who do not have any. While this film will draw tears from your eyes, you will see happy memories. The happiest that can be mustered. They will be spliced in with the scenes in the movie, occurring side-by-side with all the smiles and fuzzy feelings leaking off the screens. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself. Also, beware! This film contains the angriest of Theater Cleaning Robots. Dropping anything on the floor will result in a bit of a flogging with a wooden paddle and a robot calling you a dirty slut and claiming that you like it. Yes, BDSM robots will not take your bad behavior. You better bend over and start apologizing for being such a filthy, little theater-goer. [ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with trigger-y or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the meme. ]

//RUN.EXE Welcome to CEREALIA's seventh Test Drive Meme. For your convenience, we have compiled a post detailing everyone's arrival experience and a FAQ that should explain everything in more detail. Please read them thoroughly before playing. Thank you!

Comments

Nora Valkyrie | RWBY

[heartboop]

Theater IV

[Here anyone can find a girl who is happily munching on buttery popcorn, totally yelling at the screen from time to time and cheering at all the explosive scenes. Yeah, ACTION! Sometimes popcorn is tossed into the air during her rather lively audience participation. Watch your eyes! She doesn't know what this place is, but it's got three gold stars from her!

Then she sees a scene where there's jam all over some girl's face. It looks like her face, but...that's impossible! Whether Nora notices or not, she's giggling at the scene, because...she can relate to that 1000%! ]


Theater V

[WHO IS WRESTLING THESE GROSS BDSM BOTS?!

Oh, that would be Nora!

All that popcorn she got everywhere? Well, now they want to "punish" her. Yeah, no, that's not happening! One robot is already on the ground in tatters, and she has one in a headlock!]

I'll give YOU a spanking! OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!

V

[espersions]

[ He has just walked out of My Petite Equestrian Experience because seeing the face of his sister pastede on the leather-clad body of a dominatrix hit far too close to home, and he has actually succumbed to the temptation of a huge bag of grease-laded theater popcorn, with the idea that perhaps terrible-for-you comfort food might expunge some of the horrific images zinging through his brain.

That, and a different movie, perhaps. Anyway, he walks at random into the Yard Door theatre, only to find a girl in the aisle doing unspeakable things to a robot.

... ]

You know, if you're into that sort of thing, there are any number of establishments in the Pleasure District that can accommodate you.

[heartboop]

[Nora pauses in her struggles and looks up to him, a bit confused by his words. If only because she didn't really hear all of that.]

Huh? Into what? Wrestling? Beating down pervy robots? Dirty popcorn?

1/2

[espersions]

[ Now that he's over his initial surprise, he begins to sort out what's going on. Even so, he says: ]

I was going to say robot spanking, but all of the above, really, if that's what you're —

[ And then something on-screen catches his attention and he looks up. It's Happy Memories Time ^TM and what he sees is a small child (himself) hugging a tall man with round spectacles. ]

[espersions]

[ Well, it might have been a happy memory at the time, but now... ]

WHAT IS THIS MOVIE?

1/2

[heartboop]

WHAT?! I'm not into that! [And she drops the headlock, already a good distance from it!] Are you a pervert, too?!

[Only someone with their mind in the gutter would think that sort of thing!]

[heartboop]

[Something must have caught his attention on screen, so Nora takes a look. All she sees is a doggie playing catch with their young owner.]

Awwwww! I want one! [Such a cute little doggie!]

[espersions]

[ He assumes she means she wants a cute little kid. ]

You —

[ He's a telepath, and so he could perhaps work out exactly what she means by trying to read her mind, but at the moment he actually doesn't want to know what she's thinking.

He points to the screen, at the small child smiling so, so happily. (Or, alternately, at the super-cute doggie). ]

That's me, you idiot. Who are you calling a pervert!

V

[niceguypose]

[Rock Lee had managed to not spill anything of his own during this movie; but his ear is caught by the signs of the scuffle. He quickly flips over!]

Ah...! I wasn't told that this place had a fighting area! Now this... This is entertainment! [He glances around hopefully, looking for a robot he can battle.]

[heartboop]

It does now! [Nora takes off the head entirely and tosses it on the ground as if she just scored a touchdown.

But then three more robots gather around. Oh, was that considered littering?]

Naughty Litter Bug! Prepare for Punishment! [Now they're brandishing whips and paddles with holes. What?]

This...is...uh...NOT VALE! [She rushes forward, brandishes her Magnhild, twirls, and brings down the weapon from above, smashing one to pieces! Noticing the green guy, Nora gives a thumbs up his way.]

Say NO to Pervbots!

[niceguypose]

Good job! [He claps his hands together in approval. And then he looks curiously around at the other new robots.]

"Pervbots"...? They have such unusual weaponry... Please, let me take on one of these opponents!

[heartboop]

Sure!

[Lifts one robot up and tosses it his way!]

HEADS UP!!

[niceguypose]

Thank you very much!

[And now he raises a leg as the robot flies at him, looking so excited for combat!]

Konoha Coiling Whirlwind! [He leaps forward with a kick, knocking the robot down out of the air. He looks all too eager to keep on fighting it.]

V

[beaconed]

[ He had heard the commotion in Theatre V and somehow immediately knew that this was his responsibility. What a great leader! ...Or maybe when he heard that a girl is thrashing robots with glee, he just couldn't think of anyone else that fits the bill. ]

N-Nora!! I know you love your food, but let the cleaner bots do their job, I'll just get you new popcorn!

[heartboop]

...cleaner bots?!

[Teal eyes look down at the robot she had under her armpit.]

They were trying to spank me! How are they cleaner bots?!

[beaconed]

Spank you?! [ He looks bewildered at first, but then he's dubious. ] Are you... sure this isn't just another Nora story?

[heartboop]

Hey, that...was good entertainment! This is not! It tried to "punish me" for getting popcorn on the floor!

[She definitely used air quotes just then.

The robot spoke up again.]

Dirty girls need their bottoms spanked! Resistance is futi--

[NO! No more words! She punches it hard.]

SEE?! Pervbots!

V

[ruby_roses]

[Ruby is just watching with glee as Nora manhandles the bots.]

Let me know if you need someone to tag in, Nora.

[heartboop]

Sure thing, Ruby!

[...oh wait, where did she come from?]

How long you've been there? [Tightens her hold, making sparks fly out.]

[ruby_roses]

Long enough to see what you did with the first one's paddle.

[That actually made her cringe.]

[heartboop]

What do robots need with paddles, anyway?!

[That paddle deserved where it ended up!]

You wanna have a go? It's not much of a challenge.

Theater V.

[hollower]

[Oh, hello. This seems way more interesting than the movie, to be perfectly frank. Perona herself just escaped from her own perverted, paddle toting robot, and is very calmly avoiding more conflict by using her ghostly devil fruit powers to hover above the theater. Bastards can't get her up here...at least for a few hours, that is.

Her attention is turned toward the ruckus down below and a malicious grin spreads on her face. This is delicious, and far more satisfying a show than anything this crappy theater can produce. She snickers quietly, seated as if the air itself were a luxurious recliner, and leans her cheek against one hand. They should have advertised something like this.

]

[heartboop]

[Once Nora feels it is sufficiently subdued, she hurls it high into the air, wanting to see how far it can go on just her own strength alone. It may or may not be heading towards the onlooker.]

[hollower]

[vhsjvhhd--SHITFUCK, THIS WASN'T IN THE SCRIPT.

Perona shrieks, zipping away before she gets knocked out of the air, though she's going to cause such a ruckus. Even moreso than what's occurring now, but details.]

OI!! Watch where your flinging those, you gorilla woman!

[heartboop]

[She looks up towards where the voice came from, spotting some woman up there.]

Why are you up there? Are there good seats up there?