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C E R E A L I A ★ M O D S。 ([personal profile] reparator) wrote in [community profile] ioculus2015-03-07 10:20 am
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//TESTDRIVE7.0.EXE

//TESTDRIVE7.0.EXE

Mystery Science Theatre -3000


Welcome to Cerealia's latest attraction. In an effort to branch into other forms of entertainment, CERES has been slowly patching together films from various worlds to show in its brand new movie theater. So, grab a friend, sit back, and enjoy the newest batch of imported films with a nice bucket of popcorn. As you'll notice from the long line outside, it's the latest rage in the colony, and those tired of the same virtual battles in ViViD are eager to enjoy a little change in scenery.

For those eager to participate, you will find yourself being lead into the lobby by one of the many robotic theater employees. Showing today are five special films, and in the lobbies are various screens advertising them through the movie's digital avatar, Mnemosyne. Allow her to take you on a virtual tour of CERES' finest theatrical offerings.

(( P.S. no actual actors/actresses appear in any of the films. It's all done through advanced CGi-technology and voice acting. ))
"GOOD EVENING, MOVIE-GOERS. I AM MNEMOSYNE, YOUR GUIDE FOR THIS EVENING.

AS YOU CAN SEE, WE HAVE SEVERAL CONCESSIONS FOR YOU. PLEASE PARTAKE IN THE CONCESSIONS, BUT DO NOT MAKE A MESS. THE THEATER ROBOTS HAVE BEEN PROGRAMMED TO TAKE ACTION FOR LITTERING.

TONIGHT'S FILMS ARE THE MUCH LAUDED AND CRITICALLY ACCLAIMED FILMS HAND-PICKED BY JULIUS VINCERE:

MY PETITE EQUESTRIAN EXPERIENCE RATED A

LARGE ADVENTURER 7 RATED B

THE RETALIATORS: ERA OF RADICALON RATED C

DECEASE HARDER II RATED D

YARD-DOOR PEOPLE OF QUESTIONABLE MORALS RATED Z

PLEASE MAKE YOUR SELECTION AT THE BOOTHS IN THE FRONT OF THE LOBBY THEN FOLLOW THE DIRECTIONS TO THE APPROPRIATE THEATER. THANK YOU AND ENJOY YOUR EVENING."

//SCENARIOS.EXE
THEATER I
[ 00:00 ] MY PETITE EQUESTRIAN EXPERIENCE - RATED A

Advertised as a delightful tale of ponies discovering magic and friendship, this is a must-see! For adults that is. The ponies are killed within the first ten minutes, and then the rest of the run time is filled with a celebratory orgy of Roman-esque proportions. There are no mentions of ponies after the initial scene. They are neither seen nor mourned nor heard from. There are only naked, gyrating bodies as far as the eye can see.

If you manage to sit through the horror long enough, you will notice a certain something in between the moaning. Is that your face on one of the protags? Is it a beloved family member or a friend? You will find that spliced between the scenes are cherished and innocent childish memories now being soiled by passionate cries of pleasure. Enjoy the new memory, your poor, sweet summer child. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER II
[ 00:00 ] LARGE ADVENTURER 7 - RATED B

A touching tale of dealing with loss and more loss. This film is about a giant robot and his pet human that gets eradicated in the Third Robotic Genocide, leaving behind just a human carcass. The giant robot clings to the carcass and cries robotic tears until finally he chucks the carcass into a river full of carcasses and decides to go on a deep quest in search of cheese.

But spliced between this tale of woe, viewers will see images of themselves caught in a romantic memory. A first kiss, perhaps? A first love-making session? A first crush? A desired one will also have their face molded on top of all the carcasses as they flow away. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.

THEATER III
[ 00:00 ] THE RETALIATORS: ERA OF RADICALON - RATED C

Agent Dick Angry takes it upon himself to assemble a team of miscreant aliens to invade the hell out of "Planet Earth." The aliens include Zorn, an intelligent toaster; Crisis, a blue-skinned beauty that turns purple when she's aroused; Trish, a rogue miniature ficus with a criminal record; and General Cerealia, a handsome, ripped man who beats evil-doers with his laptop and who looks suspiciously like CERES' programmer, Elias.

This adventurous romp will feature the tragic memories of death interweaving with the destruction of the "Planet Earth." Those who attend will see first-hand the memories of their own worlds slowly being demolished before their eyes and all their loved ones screaming in agony. Then it'll loop itself again and again for the last hour of the film. Enjoy! This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER IV
[ 00:00 ] DECEASE HARDER II - RATED D

Jack McJack is a cop who is having none of your shit. In this action film, he will ride around on a velociraptor and go around punching evil-doers and detonating them with land mines. If you want all the violence in the world, this is the film for you. Watch as every second is filled with pointless explosions and every curse word in all the known languages in Cerealia.

Of course, spliced between every action scene will be every embarrassing moment of your life being played out for you and only you. Or is it? Start sweating and looking in every direction as you begin to wonder if everyone else can see that time you tripped and fell on your senpai almost kissing him (sacre bleu D= !)
BONUS - THEATER V
[ why:o'clock ] YARD-DOOR PEOPLE OF QUESTIONABLE MORALS - RATED Z

This is a touching film about tenderness and coming together to overcome obstacles and achieve greatness. The Yard-Door people run into danger when an evil megalord starts polluting the air with negative feelings. The Yard-Door people must band together and save the world through kindness. They will go and help their neighbors get across the street, rake up leaves from their lawns, donate canned food to the poor, and collect toys for children who do not have any.

While this film will draw tears from your eyes, you will see happy memories. The happiest that can be mustered. They will be spliced in with the scenes in the movie, occurring side-by-side with all the smiles and fuzzy feelings leaking off the screens. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.

Also, beware! This film contains the angriest of Theater Cleaning Robots. Dropping anything on the floor will result in a bit of a flogging with a wooden paddle and a robot calling you a dirty slut and claiming that you like it. Yes, BDSM robots will not take your bad behavior. You better bend over and start apologizing for being such a filthy, little theater-goer.
[ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with trigger-y or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the meme. ]

//RUN.EXE
Welcome to CEREALIA's seventh Test Drive Meme. For your convenience, we have compiled a post detailing everyone's arrival experience and a FAQ that should explain everything in more detail. Please read them thoroughly before playing. Thank you!


[personal profile] millionth 2015-03-10 04:28 pm (UTC)(link)
[hiro can be hit or miss when it comes to being observant, but anything that has to do with tech gets his attention faster than anything else. he's seen stuff like her gloves before, especially now that he's enrolled at SFIT, and they're added to the list of things he wants to ask about. it's a long list, though, so that one gets filed away for another time.]

Kinda getting that impression. [he takes her hand for a shake — kind of a hesitant one, clearly not too used to the gesture] Sooo...things like that happens a lot around here?
kicksilver: (dick in a box)

[personal profile] kicksilver 2015-03-10 04:29 pm (UTC)(link)
[ I hope you'll feel bad later for that pun.

As for Ruby's explanation, normally, one would probably be surprised at it. But Mercury smiles at it as a reaction. ]


Sounds exciting.
thatdamnknight: (to thine own self be true)

[personal profile] thatdamnknight 2015-03-10 04:29 pm (UTC)(link)
[such enthusiasm reminds him of Estellise (not the porn version!!). It's enough to get him to crack a smile and lower that hand. Still red as a tomato, though.]

What sort of place was your home?

[Topic change? What topic change?]
shacklebreaker: (pets burd)

[personal profile] shacklebreaker 2015-03-10 04:30 pm (UTC)(link)
Whenever we happen across the nearest ice cream stall, I shall buy you one. Consider it the first stop on the tour.

[She doesn't even need to twist his arm; he's happy enough to treat her. It has been so very long since they were able to spend time together like this, and even under the circumstances, he's willing to make the most of it.]
psycholawgy: (ooooooh boy)

[personal profile] psycholawgy 2015-03-10 04:33 pm (UTC)(link)
That... robots spanking people?

[ Once she lets go of Hiro's hand, she rests both her hands on her hips and shifts her weight to one side. ]

No, I'm pretty sure they don't. But, well, you heard the powerpoint stuff, didn't you? We're all codes now. Anything weird that happens here is usually a glitch.
thatdamnknight: (expectation is the root of all heartache)

[personal profile] thatdamnknight 2015-03-10 04:37 pm (UTC)(link)
The misuse of a title for a movie of that nature cannot be overlooked. Children could have made the same error as us...

[Think of the children!! But really, slaughter and porn is a good way to scar kids forever. Flynn plans on taking this up with management as soon as eggs can no longer be fried on his face.]
psycholawgy: (/me punts you)

[personal profile] psycholawgy 2015-03-10 04:41 pm (UTC)(link)
There's one just a block away!

[ Although, there was an ice cream stall at the theatre's lobby, but what kind of tour would it be if they just stayed in one place?

She faces Simon again and walks backwards, her hands raised as if she's showing the glory of the city. It's really very different from Los Angeles, but he should be familiar with most of the technology considering her background. But hey, new place! ]


Anyway, welcome to Cerealia! The people here are really nice, but the bad thing is that none of us here can practice law!

[ And with that, she puts both her hands on her hips as she pouts. ]
deontology: (XXI.)

[personal profile] deontology 2015-03-10 04:42 pm (UTC)(link)
No, I will not.

[calm down, tiny apprentice... Sousei just shakes his head, and then he places his hand on Soramaru's shoulder--only to usher him out of the theater and away from the crowds, obviously.]

Because there is, indeed, a way to be rid of it, and that is what I have decided to do. Now stop troubling yourself over this. I will explain everything in time.

[there are more pressing matters, weirdly enough.]
firstcloud: (46)

[personal profile] firstcloud 2015-03-10 04:46 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Oh.. He doesn't know him? That's a bit upsetting, because he's family. ]

Yes, we have, in this place. [ The city, he means. ] I'm Kumou Kagemitsu.

[ Does he have to go through this with Soramaru again? ]
thatdamnknight: (delays have dangerous ends)

so late gossshh /shuns

[personal profile] thatdamnknight 2015-03-10 04:47 pm (UTC)(link)
[his mind, even in this chaotic state, recognizes that voice immediately. glancing upwards reveals what he already knows: yuri. called it. someone in trouble and yuri not sticking his nose in to help? now THAT would be weird.

and of course weirder yet would be if yuri learned actual manners. a good weird. shame that even flynn's not naive enough to hope for the impossible.]


You make it sound as though my rank has meaning here.

[hello to you too, jackass. but really, it's good to see you. flynn's expression even has a small smile to it, though one still hidden behind gauntlet. that happiness suddenly vanishes and flynn straightens. that hand also gets lowered revealing... blood? nosebleed? nosebleed. someone hasn't noticed it to boot.]

Yuri, neither your nor Raven have been coercing the girls into engaging in unsavory acts, have you?

[SUPER SERIOUS FACE!! which is sort of killed by both nosebleed and the sheer redness of it.]
psycholawgy: (PARKAS!!)

iv

[personal profile] psycholawgy 2015-03-10 04:49 pm (UTC)(link)
[ She might not hear any voices in the theatre since everyone is watching, but she could hear the heart of someone who's humiliated to death...

So she looks around, and addresses the audience (what is shame): ]


Everyone! You don't have to be embarrassed! We've all fallen down the stairs before! Especially before a very important trial!

[ Athena for best motivational speaker 2k15. ]
niceguypose: (concerned)

[personal profile] niceguypose 2015-03-10 04:50 pm (UTC)(link)
[Rock Lee was horrified and scandalized by everything he saw. The poor ponies... and seeing the people he knew in such a movie! Is this what happened to them after their world ended?!

But then the next time he spots Haku, his attention is grabbed by something else: the mask. He points towards it in shock.]


Th-that mask!!
hagureoni: (Default)

[personal profile] hagureoni 2015-03-10 04:58 pm (UTC)(link)
[Oh, she didn't seem to take that comment well. Perhaps he shouldn't slip into old habits here.]

Well, sometimes it's better to try and humor a bad situation. [He knows them too well, after all.]
bewrightback: (sweating bullets)

[personal profile] bewrightback 2015-03-10 05:05 pm (UTC)(link)
[Not the whip, not the whip!

...But he's interrupted from his reverie as he hears that voice. Only one person sounds like that and would fall down the stairs before a very important trial. He stands up to try to look towards her.]


Athena? ...Hold it, don't look at the screen! [Don't witness your boss's shame!]
bewrightback: (this my really really neutral face)

[personal profile] bewrightback 2015-03-10 05:07 pm (UTC)(link)
She... saw just a little. And then I got the her right out of there. [He shook his head.]

It was very unsettling, but she'll be alright.
bewrightback: (hello sorry about the murder)

[personal profile] bewrightback 2015-03-10 05:08 pm (UTC)(link)
[Phoenix takes a moment to look towards the broken paddle in horrified confusion. How does he do that?!

But then he looks back towards Blackquill with a sheepish look.]


Hey, Prosecutor Blackquill! Fancy seeing you here...? [Here after the end of the universe.]
bewrightback: (oh boy i done goofed)

[personal profile] bewrightback 2015-03-10 05:10 pm (UTC)(link)
[He hesitates for a moment, then he starts to write something.]

Fine, fine...

[And he writes down a very vague description of spending time with another person. Then he looks up as the light goes out.]

I could...? Oh, thanks?
psycholawgy: (iyaaa~n senpai so bold)

[personal profile] psycholawgy 2015-03-10 05:11 pm (UTC)(link)
[ What.

OF COURSE SHE WOULD LOOK AT THE SCREEN, GOD. But she just sees the bailiff helping her up and a bunch of other lawyers laughing on the side. She doesn't even see her boss anywhere... ]


Aughh!!! Why did they have to remind me! It was my first trial by myself too!
bewrightback: (HUUUUUH?!)

[personal profile] bewrightback 2015-03-10 05:14 pm (UTC)(link)
I told you not to look!

...Wait, what? Where were you that time when I was whipped into unconsciousness in the middle of court?
twomeals: ([oh] 02)

[personal profile] twomeals 2015-03-10 05:14 pm (UTC)(link)
[Yeah, it's a bit much for a first...and Yue's still new to kissing. Taking--the hand over his eyes. And focusing on it. Or on Emil, maybe he can stare at Emil, that's safe.

Because now that he's removed the obstruction, he's suddenly not sure he wants to see any more of the screen than that tiny confusing glimpse he just got.]


...Okay.
psycholawgy: (widget don't die!!!)

[personal profile] psycholawgy 2015-03-10 05:15 pm (UTC)(link)
Boss?

... What did you just say?

[ She's 50% confused, and 50% judging. ]
bewrightback: (sheepish)

[personal profile] bewrightback 2015-03-10 05:16 pm (UTC)(link)
....

Did I say something? You know, I can't remember...!
splendour: (when the road you walk is dark)

[personal profile] splendour 2015-03-10 05:17 pm (UTC)(link)
[ the stories they could trade, tsurumaru fighting against people rewriting the past, while gracia's gone back in time to rescue her friends and comrades from their deaths.

it takes her a second to understand exactly what tsurumaru's claiming to be. ]


...A sword?!

[ but she's seen weirder things than this. if a goddess can send people into the past, what's to say another couldn't make swords alive and moving? ]

How are you moving if you're a sword? Is it magic? Why are you shaped like a person? Why are you carrying a sword too? [ with each question posed, one after another, she steps closer and closer in curiosity. then, as if to end her questions-- ] Tell me, Tsuru!
Edited 2015-03-10 17:18 (UTC)
psycholawgy: (OBJECTION OBJECTION OBJECTION!!!)

1/2

[personal profile] psycholawgy 2015-03-10 05:18 pm (UTC)(link)
Spit it out or I'll shove popcorn in your mouth!
psycholawgy: (absolute judgement)

[personal profile] psycholawgy 2015-03-10 05:19 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Wait. ]

S- Sorry! I didn't mean to say that.