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//TESTDRIVE.EXE
//TESTDRIVE.EXE
 The lights flicker overhead, music blaring from the speakers as you step inside, every sound drowned out except for that hypnotic tune. The walls are painted in an array of hypnotic colors, saturated to the point where your attention doesn't know where to land, and all kinds of screens hang from each corner, showing flashing images of ads, gadget after gadget appearing in a second to show you the best of what Ceres has to offer. Dancing bodies flank each side of the large ballroom, bodies with eyes that look hollow and their faces too symmetrical. They'll occasionally glance at you and smile, maybe even engage and offer to take you to one of the private rooms in the back. However, their words are interrupted when the lights suddenly turn brighter and focus on the center where a raised platform sits. A man appears in the center, one hand raised to silence the music while the other holds a microphone. He pauses to reach out for a glass, snatching it from one of the wait staff passing by before raising it to the crowd. "We've finally obtained our first victory here on Cerealia. The colony is ours completely and will be fully functional from this day forward. Please enjoy all the luxurious amenities we have put together, and join me in journeying towards a new and better future. Together, we will expand our territory here and reach even further horizons. And by all means, don't be shy with the staff. They're also here for your entertainment."He gestures around the room, smiling before taking a sip of his champagne. Applause echoes from the crowd while Julius steps off the stage, handing the mic to one of the staff before pausing for pictures and interviews from reporters. You stand in the crowd as the lights dim once more, lost in a sea of people and wondering where to go next. |
//SCENARIOS.EXE
PHASE I [ 18 PHASE II [ ?? PHASE III [ 21 PHASE IV [ 02 BONUS [ why[ The party will be long, so take your time enjoying each scenario... and dreading it. At the end of it all, things will be calmed down and you're free to enjoy the night as you please. Remember to keep things PG (the FAQ below elaborates!), and absolutely no forcing any R-rated things with anyone below 15-16 (so be sure to ask their age, right?) or the droids will have a little fun chasing you around! Do enjoy the pretty views of the gorgeous digital city though. Which seems strangely quiet, but at this late hour, why not, right? ] |
01 ]
The screens lining the walls inside even extend into the bathrooms and the back rooms, playing commercial after commercial, all CERES themed, as you mingle with the other guests, but occasionally, the image transforms into a flash of something else. It appears for a split-second. There's the face of a woman, lips parted in a soundless cry. She looks to be in pain, fingers pressed to the screen. It's so quick that most don't register it, barely even notice it's there unless they focus. The party continues without incident, otherwise. Because it's a pretty damn good party, isn't it? There's plenty of food, strong drinks - hey, no one under seventeen is allowed to drink - and many decorative people. Just ignore that feeling of being watched! You're just so good looking, after all.
//RUN.EXE
Welcome to CEREALIA's first test drive! Please forgive our appearance as we are going through the final stages game completion. While most pages are under development and/or hidden from the public eye, please don't feel discouraged, since knowing everything doesn't always make the experience. Your characters will know as little as you. For your convenience, we have compiled a mini-FAQ - please read it thoroughly before playing. Thank you! FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS HOW DID MY CHARACTER GET HERE? You may have been just been doing their day-to-day activities - be it swimming or fighting demons - but the next moment, a crack and blinding light - now you're here, in your best attire, celebrating. The memories of your at-home activities fade away like a fleeting dream, and it's replaced with the feeling of happiness. ( You haven't forgotten your past, just that anything you were doing seems far too distant to be important. ) Must be something in the air. You can't remember clearly fighting for CERES, and whatever this Julius Vincere is telling you might be complete bullshit for all you know, but something influences you to play along anyway - if you think about it long enough, perhaps you had fought for CERES after all...?WHO/WHAT IS CERES? WHAT IS CEREALIA? You mean... you don't remember? After all the help you gave it?WHAT FORMAT CAN WE USE FOR THIS TESTDRIVE? Action (brackets/prose), video/voice, and texting are all available via your CEREVICE at this moment. Most functions are currently undergoing a system update, but as long as it is still connected to the Auralia Network, it will be available for communicative uses.WHAT IS ViVID? An amazing VR game! The demo version of ViViD will be here to play, aren't you excited? It's played with headsets that immediately allow you to experience full-body simulation, without having to move out of your seat! You can enjoy the demo world, design your own, play alone, play with a team, but remember, the boss must be beaten! Please check the phase ii thread for details and interactions!SO... PHASE III? Sexy things can happen, you're getting hot and heavy on the dance floor, and there are rooms in the back that can be decorated to your mood, after all. REMEMBER, the age of consent is 15-16, please use your own discretion and don't upset people. For the test drive, any situation that goes above PG (beyond kissing/grinding/light making out... We're lenient) must go into threads in your own journals. Any creeper behavior or unwanted advances will get an IC boot into the Frozen Locker with "Let it Go" on repeat.POWER LIMITATIONS? Actually, no, the characters don't have any of their abilities locked or otherwise suppressed. More info will be i the official FAQ, but so long as you don't destroy the entire game ( and we trust you can use your powers responsibly— as does CERES! ), limitations are nonexistent.OKAY, WHAT ABOUT PREVIOUS GAME MEMORIES? It's completely acceptable to bring a character that has been in a previous game to Cerealia!THE NAME LOOKS FAMILIAR. . . Yes, a loosely related setting concept with a place called CEREALIA was pitched for an ExitVoid phase before the moderators decided to close the game for good. A few of us got together with the original pitchers of the idea since we thought it really awesome and with a lot of potential and decided to try our own thing with it!ARE THE GAMES RELATED? Nope. Not at all, it's been rehashed from the ground up and built to stand on its own as an original place and game.We'll keep coming back to this, so don't worry. |
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[in some way, it's teasing. if only because there is a strange irony to it all. between them, heung soo had always been the one who was nicer and well-mannered; he'd been the one that could be intimidating if he chose to be, but also turned it off just as well. it came with the territory of being a genuinely good kid, despite the fact that he'd fallen in with a pretty shitty crowd. nam soon, on the other hand, may have had the more delicate features, but there was no denying the fact that his grins could be twisted in a way that was only right for a real thug. that's exactly why hearing the term kkangpae attached to heung soo and not himself was strange.
but also funny to joke about, in that sort of sardonic way they both liked to approach things.]
Whenever that is. [he'll respond to heung soo's eventual giving in to the way they're sitting just like that. he shakes his shoulders a bit, much like a kid would do when snuggling under the blankets on a cold night. it causes him to nudge against heung soo a little more.
why he does this? because he can. maybe he just likes every reminder that heung soo is here and tangible in this strange situation.] I don't really know how to get back home from here. Or where here is.
[nam soon doesn't sound terribly concerned when he says this, though. it comes out more of an idle thought, small talk conversation to keep him from falling back asleep like this.]
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They'll probably tell more once the party is over. [ Whenever that'll be. Your sense of time really gets screwed up in a place like this.
But somehow he doesn't feel as fully worried as he should be about leaving such an important thing up to the future. It's probably since his first priority is already settled, Nam Soon is right here and just fine, judging from the way he's getting more and more comfortable against him. Sure, it'll be trouble if they're going missing for a night, and if there's anything he is still worried about it's the fact that his sister must be freaking out over him being gone - but there's just nothing else they can do right now. Heung Soo's already mentally apologizing to her, even if it won't do a thing either.
He's about to open his mouth and say something else, but something interrupts him before he does.
A scream.
And not just the usual partygoer screams he's been hearing this entire time already, that is a scream of terror for sure. Not from the backrooms like the one they're in, but from the main party hall, it sounds like.
Heung Soo immediately turns his head to look at the guy resting against his shoulder, knowing he won't have to say a thing. The sound was so loud that it's impossible to have missed it. ]
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actually, nam soon doesn't want to think about that much. she is one scary noona when she wants to be and he'd already been warned not to cause heung soo trouble. not that he wants to do that, but they're pretty good at doing that inadvertently anyway. at the very least, it's the only thing he needs to worry about. just making sure that heung soo gets back home safely... that's all that matters, right? he has someone to go home to, after all. someone who will worry.
which means it needs to be protected more than the boy who will go home to dark, empty silence. sure, there's a slim chance that his dad will be in the area, but those moments are so fleeting they could barely be considered lucky.
he's about to make a joke about that in strange synchronicity when the sound of a scream erupts. it brings nam soon to immediately attention, and he sits up. it breaks the comfortable contact and definitely pulls him out of hazy, post-nap grogginess he'd been fighting through all the while. that wasn't just a scream of terror, it was the sort of scream of terror that came out of a horror movie. ...and something that shouldn't have any place at a loud, upbeat party.]
Heung Soo-yah... [he looks over, his normally complacent expression replaced with that concerned spark that comes with a situation like this. he doesn't say anything else, but he doesn't think he has to. they need to go see what's up, even if it could mean getting themselves into some shit.]
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Yeah. [ Even if the other didn't necessarily ask a question, he still replies as if he has, or if he's agreeing to something - a near-wordless agreement to go look between the two of them.
Heung Soo climbs back onto his feet with his friend's weight off him, staring at the door. Truthfully, he's pretty sure they are going to get themselves into some shit this way. This whole place is so weird, looking like some sci-fi movie, and then there's people acting like they're straight from some sort of manga.. whatever that person was screaming at, the fact that it's something small or ordinary is unfortunately pretty low at this point.
But.. well, they've been through a lot of shit together already anyway (even if the biggest of that shit was caused by Nam Soon himself). Might as well add one more to the list - not like there's any other choice, even though he doesn't look particularly happy about it either.
He at least waits until his friend gets up as well, but then he does start heading for the door. Can't linger for long or they'll just arrive in the middle of the shit breaking loose. ]
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the truth of the matter may be that whatever is causing this may be something well beyond their capabilities. this place and everything about it has been strange from the offset — things that would be in manga, in movies, in video games. and the difference between things that happened there and the things that happened in their lives means... well, weird stuff. super powers, demon powers, world-specific technologies. nothing that they had, and as much as nam soon knows he could fight a bunch of punks in gyeonggi without batting an eye, this could be totally different. they could be out of their league.
that ceres guy had said something about a victory. they were celebrating something. a war, a fight? nam soon doesn't really know; maybe he should have paid closer attention. either way, he knows two things: they have to see what's going on, and he has to make sure nothing happens to heung soo. at any cost.]
Let's go. [he picks up speed, moving around heung soo to get in front of him before actually stepping out of the room. maybe it's an unnecessary measure, but he's a little too concerned first and foremost with heung soo's leg and his overall agility. sure, he's better than he was and does at times display a surprising capability, but nam soon would rather take the hit first if all hell does break loose.
he's got strong bones, so unless something's out then putting bullets into people's hearts or like. light sabering their heads off, he's sure they can maneuver just fine this way.]
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So now, when there's something that's very probably a lot more dangerous than Jung Ho once he's pissed off? It's not surprising at all that Nam Soon tries to take the lead, even though it's not like Heung Soo wants to see anything happen to his friend either. But he knows arguing it now is just going to be useless - there's more important things to focus on, like finding out what's going on.
Not that it takes them long to do so.
Even if he might be the one following, it'd be terribly difficult to not spot what's up ahead once they've gotten far away from the back rooms enough to spot the main area of the party. The smell of blood hangs thickly in the air, and there's splatters of it on the floor, on the walls - dripping from the ceiling, although it's hard to spot the corpse up there above the ventilation from their current position, still a distance away from it all. But what isn't difficult to spot is the black, tall creature in the middle of the mass of panicking people, looking like something that came straight out of a horror movie or some really screwed up manga. The many red glowing eyes, the sharp teeth, the way it slings people around as if they're little more than bags of sand..
.. this is even beyond anything Heung Soo could have imagined, and for a moment he's just frozen, staring at it as it rampages on the other end of the room. This isn't real. This can't be real. Stuff like this-- it just doesn't happen, even with as weird as everything else has been nothing. It can't be real, but it feels much too real to be a dream, and..
The more he sees, the more he feels sick to his stomach. But he knows one thing, and that's that they have to get out of here. This isn't something they can handle, this isn't something even Nam Soon could handle if he let himself go.
His heart races even more quickly in panic than it did back when they had to deal with the gangsters, but he knows that if they don't act fast, that thing will notice them instead.
It's impossible to notice Nam Soon's expression from behind, but he doesn't care, Heung Soo still reaches out to grab his best friend's wrist and give a firm tug on it, indicating they have to get the hell out of here. Now. ]
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this is a gruesome murder scene.
it's not any normal scene either, that thing looks like it came out of hr giger's nightmares with the intent of totally destroying everything in sight. nothing had felt real or correct before; even though nam soon had elected to stay calm just as heung soo did (and maybe to keep it that way, a bit), he knew something was off. this is the kind of shit that only happens in dreams, but as strange and dreamlike as it theoretically should be, it's all too real. the gangsters were nothing compared to what they were facing right now. nam soon's mouth is clamped shut (barely, and only to prevent himself from saying anything at all) as his brain tries to catch up with what he's seeing.
so when heung soo grabs his wrist, it's brought to attention. he's right, they need to get away. nam soon looks back at the crowd for a moment, but turns to step away — he doesn't run, though. his strides are long and quick, but he doesn't want to make any noise that will garner that things attention. for a brief moment, he looks back at the crowd, and he's bothered.
leaving them alone to likely die is already giving him survivor's guilt, but it's more important that heung soo doesn't get hurt or worse. it's not until they've temporarily holed up in a back corner room that he dares speak.]
What the hell are we doing here. [it takes a lot to shake nam soon's resolve before someone directly threatens heung soo, but this goes beyind his normal realm of understanding.
park heung soo, he's scared to death right now.] We have to find the way out of this place. Without being seen or heard.
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Even if all of this seems unreal enough to be a nightmare, even if it feels terrible since the two of them have always been a duo to protect other people, to help others out, even since they were kids - but right now there's nothing they can do. They certainly can't fight some sort of monster like that, not even Nam Soon. At least the other guy isn't getting any weird ideas about trying something like that, because Heung Soo definitely wouldn't let him throw himself at that. Maybe some sorts of danger, but this is too much. And the thought of Nam Soon dying.. well, he doesn't even want to start thinking of that, it's impossible to wrap his mind around. The two of them just have to find a way out, one way or another. ]
These places usually have some sort of back exit. [ Even in his tone it's visible that he's just as shaken as Nam Soon is. He's purposefully trying to keep his tone down a little just in case, but it's still just a little bit too tight.
So they'd just have to find it, since.. he bites his lower lip for a second before continuing. ] .. the only other exit I saw was back there.
[ Where that thing is. And although technically it may be possible to run past while it's occupied.. well, that running part is exactly the problem. He knows he's going to be a major liability if it comes down to something like that, even if Nam Soon might be able to make it. ]
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[right now, they're both in way over their heads. this is the first time that nam soon can ever remember having a feeling quite like this, and it's not good. arguably, it's worse than the incident three years ago because it's so far gone and out of their control. neither of them was at fault for this, but now the risks are too high to face anything head on.
he has to stop and think about this for a minute, because there's no good approach. they could run, sure, but then what? he can't... he can't let anything bad happen to heung soo, no matter what the cost is. it's a scary notion, but he'd rather die so heung soo can live if that's what it takes to get his best friend out of this nightmare safely. after the ways he'd been wronged — well, maybe this is is the only way he can make up for all the ways he'd fucked up back then. in his fear, it doesn't occur to him that heung soo may disagree, because nam soon doesn't see much value in his life outside of being with his best friend anyway.
he's dumb and selfish enough to not immediately recognize the consequences of this train of thought. the fear and panic definitely dictate everything that comes next.]
Go. Go, and don't look back. [his jaw sets as he says it, determination coursing through him. of course, nam soon will keep pace right behind him, but there's no way in hell he would dream of running if it means leaving heung soo behind if he falters. if that... thing comes for them, he'll play the distraction — whatever it takes to make sure heung soo gets out of this place.]
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And Heung Soo knows that look in Nam Soon's eyes, that resignment in the middle of the panic and fear, and he knows what it means. If Heung Soo can't run any further, if that thing comes for him, then he will--
He knows this isn't the time to get angry or argue anything, not at all, but he can't help it. The thought that Nam Soon would throw his own life away so easily for his own just.. pisses him off. Does he really think that's for the best? Does he really think Heung Soo's just going to be fine after he gets out of here, even if his best friend sacrificed himself in the progress? He already had a hard time accepting Nam Soon doing anything for him before, and this is an entirely different league, this is the kind of sacrifice he couldn't accept from anyone ever.
Besides, without Nam Soon he's -- he's nothing. Just the way he felt when he transferred to the same school as him and saw him acting so normal, so much not like the bastard he remembered. If Nam Soon is gone, then so is Heung Soo. Without Nam Soon, there's this hole in his heart that tugs and eats away at him, without him, he can't do anything but wander and feel like nothing is truly worth it anymore.
He knows they can't make too much sound, but he wants to convey this to the other guy even so. He has to make this clear, just so Nam Soon won't get any dumb ideas if they do go out there.
In an attempt to at least keep it somewhat quiet, he grabs the other by the collar, dragging him close so he can keep his tone low rather than drawing that thing's attention to where they are. But even though he's definitely trying to not be too loud, the anger is still so easily visible - in his eyes, in his tight tone, in the way the hand that holds onto the fabric of Nam Soon's clothes shakes.
(It's not mostly anger, really, it's fear of losing the thing most important to him again, again, and this time he would be unable to recover it.) ]
What are you thinking, you bastard? Do you really think I'm just going to let you throw yourself at that thing? [ Never. He'd rather just die as well then. ]
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could he really do that? even if heung soo escapes, he doesn't know what would come next. nam soon knows that if the roles were reversed, he'd probably rather be dead, because unlike before, there'd be no second chance. no way to repent. he already had lived like a shell of a person, because they both sucked so much at existing alone, but in that case... it would be so much worse. but all the same, nam soon sees a potential in heung soo that he doesn't have for himself.
his best friend could probably achieve the world if he tried. he'd always been smarter, more talented, and had goals. even if he needed to find a new one without soccer, he could, and he would. he had a sister who cares too deeply about him. the finality of a situation could likely force him into moving forward, that's what nam soon wants to believe. as much as he knows they both struggled over those three years, there had been so much unfinished business that doing so became an impossibility. this is different though, and it has the potential to end in an entirely different manner.
it's not as if nam soon wants to die, of course. even if he has no other goals, he has a reason to live, to exist. but it doesn't change the fact that this is the only feasible way to do this. he'll do everything he can to avoid that thing so they can both get to safety. there's no way in hell though that nam soon will let heung soo trail behind.
and he won't let them both go down if it isn't necessary.
nam soon's jaw sets, and he looks heung soo straight in the eyes. he can read all of the masked expressions; it doesn't need to be said that this isn't just anger, but fear. he knows his best friend well enough for that much. in his own eyes? he's steeled himself. there's a strange sense of resolve, though his own fears lurk in the way his brow furrows and his lips contort just slightly out of tension.]
You think I plan on dying, you dumb bastard? [he squints a little; it's obvious he's trying to deflect the question and assure heung soo.] I'm not throwing myself at it.
I'm not running ahead and leaving you behind, either.
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This is the opposite. He wants Nam Soon to run and live, but now he refuses to leave - and it almost makes him bitter enough to make some remark about it, to ask him if running away isn't supposed to be his speciality, but he doesn't want to make things even worse on both of them right now. He at least has enough awareness of the situation to not try some shit like that.
(Besides, if he's truly honest with himself -- as much as he wants Nam Soon to live, as much as he wants him to run.. the idea of being left behind again is just as scary as the idea of death.) ]
Then what are you going to do if I can't run anymore? What if it notices and heads towards me? [ His voice is shaking too by now. With the fear, mostly, but honestly - all of this is making him a little more emotional than he'd like to be right now, and he tries to swallow thickly and force it down the best he can. Because he can see that resolve in his best friend's eyes, and he knows what it means. Nam Soon's the type who would try and distract it just to give him a little bit more time. It was the same with those gangsters, right? When he can't flee, Nam Soon doesn't flee either, but fights.
Even if this is an impossible battle.
But on the other hand, it's also hard to miss the fear that mixes in with the resolve. He might be brave and strong (just like Heung Soo) and he might be Tsunami (not so much like Heung Soo), but of course he's just scared too. This whole situation is something way above their heads, and he wants nothing more than for both of them to find a way out of this just like they always have with every situation they've dealt with before rather than Nam Soon getting himself killed in what he might see as some weird kind of repayment that Heung Soo never wanted. Whatever happens, just don't do that for his sake-- ]
.. Don't talk big when you're scared too.
[ Go Nam Soon, he's scared to death right now. ]
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there's definitely a point in time where nam soon may have rather died than deal with this sort of hell, but even though he has no aim or direction in his life? he definitely wants to live.
but he wants heung soo to live more than himself. because he needs to, but there's also that glimmer of selfishness; how could he imagine living on without heung soo? it had been hard enough when they were separated, hoping every day that his (then former) best friend was living well. "are you okay? are you eating well? has your leg healed well enough? did you make new friends without me?" there were a million questions he always asked himself, and it was that knowing along with the hope they'd one day reunite. even if it had scared him, those hopes kept him moving from day to day. the notion of living on without that? with all his hope dead?
there would be no point in living at all.]
I'll do something. [what that something is? well, nam soon doesn't know. distract the creature, anything to keep heung soo from the direct line of fire. he sucks in a breath, gritting his teeth and letting his nostrils flare...
he chokes back some of his own emotion, because nam soon knows that his resolve needs to persevere more than anything else. even with the tensions rising and heung soo's grip tight, he holds on to that much while never retaliating physically.] I won't leave you behind again, so shut up and just go.
...I'll be right behind you. So go, before it's too late!
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.. but.. of course he isn't agreeing, he isn't moving one inch on any of this, and Heung Soo knows that he won't be able to convince his best friend. Not with that reaction, that sheer determination running through Nam Soon's body that he can feel even just from gripping the fabric of his clothing.
They don't have much time here anyway. Sooner or later that thing will go on moving throughout the area, and it if finds them here, trapped into a corner -- well, then their chances are going to be even less good, as far as that's still possible.
Slowly he releases his grip on the other, moving the hand back to his side, tightly held into a fist until his knuckles are practically white from the force applied to them. ]
Don't do anything stupid. [ Despite the situation, despite the fear and anger and desperation, his words almost seem carefully chosen all the same. As if they convey a meaning that can easily be understood - between the two of them, at least. ]
.. Or I'll do something stupid too.
[ Distracting it he can accept up to a certain level, but if Nam Soon will put him in any position where it's obvious he's just practically asking to get killed, then Heung Soo is going to follow him into it instead of leaving the person most important to him there to just die - even if he'd have to drag himself across the ground for it, really.
Letting himself be dragged into shit by Nam Soon is what he's practically been doing all his life, why quit when there's actually something important at stake?
But with that, he does at least turn and walk like Nam Soon said. Not quickly yet though, while they're not close to that monster again - he's saving his leg for that, of course. ]
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[the words come out in an exasperated mutter under his breath as nam soon fixes his collar. he shakes his head, clicking his tongue in disapproval as he watches heung soo take those first few steps.
he should have expected a response like that. his friend is as dumb as bastard as he is, after all, and they both have a little too much of a complex about their own history to let things go so easily. just as he couldn't leave heung soo behind, nam soon realizes he's getting the same treatment. in a way, it's comforting to know that heung soo keeps his promises even still — this may not land him in jail, but it could definitely be a step worse and get him killed. he knows it, and nam soon knows it's a very real possibility that whatever that thing is, it could hear them and make them the next target.
he's scared to death of that, but he knows there's no avoiding it either.
and the fact that no matter how he tries to push heung soo away, he won't falter because of that promise (among other things) makes him glad, if nothing else, that he has his friend back. 'thanks, heung soo-yah...' he thinks to himself as he shoves his hands into his pockets. what little comfort it brings is still overshadowed by that possibility, and it just makes him want even more to ensure it doesn't happen. nam soon still doesn't want him to do something stupid, because he still needs to leave and find his sister. he needs to grab at the hope of a happier, normal life, with or without his best friend.
nam soon takes a few steps forward, matching heung soo's speed from a few paces behind. his eyes dart around, constantly shifting between keeping an eye out for that monster and making sure heung soo remains safe and tangible. all the while, his breath is caught in his throat and his pulse is racing — for all the times in his life he should have been scared shitless, this is one of the few times he's actually legitimately scared.
and despite the terror that is the prospect of death, it still feels less scary than the night he ruined heung soo's future. maybe it's too early to say, but he thinks he'd rather try a million daring escapes than relive that sort of fear.
...for whatever that's worth. the only thing that trumps it now is the idea of heung soo facing other misfortune in any way.
he has to prevent that, no matter what.]
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As they're silently walking down the corridor, every footstep seems much louder than it should be, as if the monster could notice it at any moment. But moreso than his own footsteps, he's focused on the sound of the other's. Falling behind him step by step, with the same rhythm - the only sign that Nam Soon is still following him. The only sign that they're still together, that there's a possibility they might make it out together after all. If those footsteps stopped or disappeared, then there's no way Heung Soo could just keep walking on, he'd look behind him for sure, he'd have to find his best friend since him running away twice (although this time not exactly voluntarily) is not something he'd be able to endure.
But the footsteps continue along with his own, almost more like a shadow completely in sync with him than another person. (But then again, isn't that what they've always been like, no matter which one of them was following in any given situation?) Like the sound of his heart pounding in fear in his throat, step by step by step..
.. until he reaches the corner again. He knows that if they turn the corner here, they'll be in the hall with that thing again, that it'll all come down to how well his leg holds out then.
He knows he should start moving quickly just in case the monster already moved as well in the time they spent back in that room. Heung Soo knows it, he understands it very well, but he can't. Not just because of fear (although he's scared, he's frightened) but since he realises that there's a chance this is the last time he'll ever see his best friend again.
So instead he momentarily does turn his head, he looks back like Nam Soon exactly told him not to, but he doesn't care about that last fact. He has to see Nam Soon right there, he has to look at him and exchange a look. If not just because they can't exactly talk where that thing would be able to hear them, but also just since looks have already proven to say enough between the two of them again and again and again. So he turns one last time, he looks, his desperation laid bare just in his eyes.
Nam Soon-ah.. I'm going to run. Even his leg might not make it, he'll run, he has to run, he has to make sure to make it even if his leg will fall off the moment they've managed to get somewhere safe again because he refuses the possibility of his best friend throwing himself at that thing in his place.
So..
- don't just throw yourself away, don't just leave again, because what the hell is he supposed to do without the most important person in his life again and this time permanently, who's going to put his heart back together then with this bastard gone, whatever you do just don't do that -
So run with me and don't stop. ]
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he slows when he sees heung soo's head turning, and he's prepared to grit his teeth and make a disapproving face for even looking back at all, especially at such a critical moment. but it only takes that one instant to be able to read that expression, and nam soon knows exactly what he means.
there aren't any words needed, not for the obvious implications, and not even for the subtle ones that are layered in there. heung soo is going to make a break for it — they both have to, and they have to do their best to make it out together. it's what nam soon wants anyway, but the fact that heung soo is determined to convey that much before he takes off lights a small spark in him. he doesn't know what's going to happen, but he wants his best friend to escape at any cost.
and even though he's willing to throw himself away to make that a reality, nam soon doesn't want to be the person to abandon the most important person to him for a second time.
that means he has to live, right?
the truth is that he has no idea if it's possible, but he doesn't want to instill any more worry in heung soo. doing so could cause him to falter and look back again; it could cost them everything. so nam soon steels himself, eyes closing for a moment as he tries to put his focus into looking straight forward and moving at a pace just slow enough to keep a few steps behind. his teeth are clenched tightly, and when he opens his eyes, there's firm resolve in them.
he gives his head a nod, the go-ahead for heung soo to start running. there's no turning back from here on out... whatever that may mean for the two of them and their lives.]
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So the moment he sees that nod, he looks back, knowing that the big hall with that monster is right around the corner. If it's still all the way to the other side of the room they maybe have a chance, as long as it isn't too fast, as long as his knee doesn't give out.. there's a lot of "if"s about the situation, but he has to believe he can overcome those. He has to.
When they enter open space, when he knows they're in the monster's field of view, he throws caution to the wind and starts running. He doesn't doubt that thing is aggressive enough to just jump them no matter whether they walk or run, so he just goes all out, hoping they'll make it in time.
(It's almost funny despite the situation - as much as he always imagined it was some sort of soccer match when they had to run as fast as they could from angry store owners and the like when they were younger.. he can't even imagine thinking about that too. Visualising the goal being in the distance and running towards it, none of that is happening anymore - the thing that spurs himself on instead is the person running behind him, the way he can hear those quick footsteps fall right after his. Nam Soon is right at his back, and if he doesn't run with all his might, then he would be bringing his best friend into the worst kind of shit too. He can't do that. He could never - Nam Soon is too important to him for it.)
Still, it's not easy. Running itself isn't too hard, it's not the endurance that troubles him.. it's the fact that he can always feel a pang in his leg halfway through, like an electric shock shaking him up, and he grits his teeth and lets out a pained groan. Shit, of course this would happen, what did he expect with his bum leg.. it hurts like hell, but he doesn't stop running. Even if he'll have to run so much that his leg will fall right off after, he doesn't care. He can't stop now. They'll both die.
Heung Soo can hear the monster roaring in the distance. He runs, and his leg protests, and usually it's where he gives up since he knows it's not exactly a good idea to pressure his leg that much.. he can't now. As much as it hurts like hell, he has to keep going.
At least determination is enough to pull him through, and he practically slams against the big doors in the hall to get them open, a strange coolness of night air greeting him outside.. but he doesn't really care. He doesn't even bother to pay attention to the new surroundings - all he does is make sure the door swings open far enough to allow Nam Soon to follow him through them, make sure he can still hear those footsteps behind him even as they keep running, another street away and--
-- and that has to be enough. It has to be, because he really can't run any further, he's ran his leg until it's completely given out, and it's only thanks to his reflexes being fairly good despite the pain that he catches himself with his arms before he just falls face first on the ground outside. His leg feels like it's on fire, but at least he can't hear the monster anymore (is it still in that party hall?) and Nam Soon is..
He rolls around so he's lying on his back and can actually see, even if it comes with a groan. His head feels a little hazy, but he can at least definitely make out the shape of his best friend being right there. And honestly, that was his main concern even before even considering the pain he's in right now. The latter doesn't exactly help with getting actual words out, though. ]
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their time is extremely limited now.
each step forward is a progression; it moves them closer to their goal, but also causes heung soo a sort of pain that nam soon can only imagine. it's not just the physical strain, but the shitty memories that come with it. and nam soon is forced to watch from behind with worry at every step, the feelings of insurmountable guilt stinging in his chest as he's reminded (as if he ever forgets) that he's the reason that his best friend has to suffer this way. he almost falters himself, the threat of tears blurring his vision as they press forward. at this point, it's not the monster that scares nam soon. he's practically forgotten it's there — he can't even hear it anymore. he hears his racing heart pounding so hard that the sound resonates in his ears, and he hears the uneven sound of heung soo's feet hitting the ground with every step.
he's worried.
he's so worried, but so ready to leap into action and make sure that heung soo doesn't have a chance to stop. whatever it takes, his best friend is getting out of this place alive.
so when nam soon feels the cooler air against his skin as heung soo pushes the door open, he's not sure what comes next. there's a slight sense of relief that they've made it out of the building.... but that's about it. especially once they've made their distance and heung soo collapses to the ground.]
Heung Soo-yah! [the name slips from his mouth in a frenzied panic as he catches up to where his friend lays. as he forces himself to a halt, nam soon doubles over, hands gripping at his thighs as he fights to catch his breath. it hurts, burning from the speed and intensity of the run, coupled with the change in temperature.] Are...
[he barely wheezes out that first word before having to stop, still in need of more oxygen in his lungs before he can say more. his nostrils flare and tears still brim his eyes as he heaves those breaths before he can ask the question he already knows the answer to.] Are you okay?
the one opportunity to use this icon tbh
In fact, he can't even remember the last time it hurt this much. He's been running ever since that incident, yes, but he alwas made sure to stop before it got too bad. Even when he saw Nam Soon disappear into that car, he knew he had to give up after a little bit or he would never be able to even walk ever again.
This time he didn't have a choice though. He had to keep running, for his own life and for Nam Soon's as well. And his leg burns, aches, sending sharp pains through his body that make him close his eyes and bite his lip to even try to deal with it. And it's just when another sting hits him that he realises when the last time was that it hurt this bad, when he was writhing on the ground just like this - the very same night that this all started, the night when Nam Soon crushed his leg in the middle of that beating.
The memory makes it even worse and urges him so badly to just get up, to not make this worse on either of them, but he can't. Even if he could bite back and pretend he's okay with some slighter pain, this much is..
He opens his lips, sucks in a breath, forces himself to look up at his best friend. What's he supposed to say to that? Of course he's not okay, he can't even pretend he is, but he doesn't want Nam Soon to look so helpless either, just like how the look in his eyes had suddenly changed that night. ]
N-- Nam Soon-ah.. -- nngh!
[ Thankfully (or not) his leg saves him from having to think of an answer, and he doesn't get much further than the name before he groans in pain again. ]
god why would you do this to me
[he repeats the name a few times, each time letting it increase in both volume and panic. it's not as if nam soon doesn't know the answer to that question anyway. even before he'd asked, he knew that answer would be a no.
it was my fault then... and it's my fault again now.
rational thought leaves nam soon at a time it absolutely shouldn't, but it just can't be helped. his eyes glaze over, his heart still racing with panic as he drops to his knees at heung soo's side. there's a lump forming in his throat, and he can't get that notion out of his head. this is all his fault. if he hadn't gotten so mad three years ago, if he hadn't taken things too far, if he hadn't forced heung soo to run right now... he wouldn't be laying on the ground like this. he wouldn't be writhing in pain while out on some strange street on a chilly night. hell, for all he knows, they wouldn't even be here (wherever here is) at all if not for that.
so nam soon can't help anything. not the way his face is wracked with guilt, nor the the way his hands hover over heung soo's knee, trembling uncontrollably. he can't help the lump that forms in his throat, or the tears that form in his eyes. even though he knows that heung soo is probably in more pain right now, and that he needs to be doing anything but totally shutting down, he can't help himself. there is no coping mechanism for this sort of situation. not when he's somehow led his best friend into a situation that pains them both in more ways than anyone in any world could possibly understand.
there's only one thing nam soon really knows right now.
he can't leave. he won't leave. even though there's a part of him that knows his fight or flight reaction is set to flight, nam soon knows that he can't repeat the past. even if he really wanted to, he isn't sure his legs would be able to carry him at this point. how long did it take for him to be able to at the hospital? not until he saw heung soo's face in the window... and right now, he's already jumped that hurdle. so he absolutely can't leave.]
It's okay. It's okay. Just... just wait. We got out, it's okay. [he repeats it like a mantra with the hopes that one of them will start believing it. nam soon doesn't. really, he just wants to throw up, but he's doing his best to hold it together for heung soo's sake.
(he's failing miserably, of course, but isn't that to be expected?)
he doesn't know what else he can do. he can't make that pain stop, he can't offer any advice. he feels so useless. it's times like this he's reminded why there's nobody worse than him, why he wishes he could just throw himself away in the same manner ha kyung threw her uniform right into the han that night.]
i don't even know why i'm doing this to myself let alone to you
Not that Heung Soo blames him in the slightest. He still remembers that time in that storage shed after all and just how much he himself freaked out at seeing the other passed out there and no one around to answer his yells for help.
Still, maybe this would have been slightly easier had it been the other way around. Because even with as mature and responsible as Nam Soon can be at moments, as he's suddenly turned out to be after these years of seperation, Heung Soo also understands more than anyone that out of the two of them, Nam Soon is just that bit more emotionally fragile - when he slips beyond a certain point, there's just no saving it from going off the rails. Like right now. And for once, Heung Soo isn't in any kind of position where he can at least try to help to pull him back, to keep him calm, to keep him from doing anything stupid or rash. It's already enough trouble to keep himself together here, to not just pass out from the pain in the middle of an unfamiliar street with a downright monster somewhere in this place.
Still, he tries - blindly he moves his arm (at least he's capable of doing that much without being in a world of pain) until his hand manages to find Nam Soon's by sheer touch, latching onto it immedaitely and squeezing tightly as if it's his life raft in a storm. Because it's not just for the other's comfort, it's for his own as well, really.
Because the thing that stuck with him the most from that night.. it's not necessarily the pain in his leg, not the look on Nam Soon's face as Heung Soo looked up at him.. it's his best friend's retreating back he spotted from behind that hospital window. Like this he can maybe make sure that doesn't happen again, because even with as shitty as all of this is already, his biggest fear is losing him all over again. He wouldn't be able to endure it a second time.
And as much as he wants to at least try to comfort his best friend or do anything to make the situation better, the pain in his leg forces him to more instinctive parts of his brain that are more easy to reach, and words escape from his lips half-mumbled before he even realises it. ]
... Don't leave.
i'm going to puke and throw myself off a bridge
hearing those words coupled with the way heung soo latches to his arm is enough for him to just crumble mentally from the weight of the situation. if it were any other person, he likely could have handled it, but coming from heung soo just crushes him. those words and actions have a meaning that only the two of them could understand, and it brings nam soon physical pain to realize it.
there's a feeling that burns in his chest; it's not the same as that breathless feeling from running, or from fear. it's a pang of deep-cutting pain. he knows he left before, when he caused all the damage directly, and he knows that part of him wants to do the same now. but it's really the first time that nam soon can clearly see with his own eyes, firsthand, how badly his actions had scarred heung soo. sure, he knew from the sight of how he walked, how he avoided gym class on soccer days, or how even jumping a fence was an issue. he knew because heung soo had told him that he'd looked for someone to ease his heart, that he'd been more mad for walking away than breaking his leg...
seeing heing soo like this, though? it's too much. there's a fear, an insecurity to it that makes nam soon wish that monster would find them just to gut him alive and put an end to this feeling, this guilt. seeing heung soo grab onto him and plead as if history is going to repeat itself — it's too much.]
...Dumb bastard. [he barely manages to say the words, his voice cracking as he does. any tears that lined his eyes make their move when he blinks, sliding down his cheek; nam soon doesn't even acknowledge that they're there, despite the fact that he sniffles. he remains unmoving otherwise, his arms locked in place. hands, arms, his entire body trembles and quakes from the strange rush of emotions he feels. now isn't the time to have a breakdown like this, not when heung soo is in this much pain and so desperate to not be alone. but how can he keep his composure when the calm one between them is so pleading?] Where the hell would I go without you?
just like jae hee.....
It's obvious the other is falling apart at the seams right here, but as badly as Heung Soo wishes he could do something about it (since he's always been the one to do something about it, always been the one to try and drag Nam Soon back to some sort of emotional stability, even if it was anger rather than tears he dealt with back then) he can't. He doesn't feel much better than it, after all, especially not since he has the pain to deal with on top of everything. The painful memories, his lost dream, it all just comes back to him.
The only good thing about it is the reassurance. Even if Nam Soon is falling apart, this time he's not running. He's not leaving. He's still right here with him.
As long as Nam Soon doesn't leave again, then he can scrape himself together somehow. Isn't that what he told himself over and over again in the hospital? If Nam Soon just would have stayed, if he had just come back to his hospital room the next day after running away at first and told him these very words.. then he would have been alright, bum leg or no bum leg.
It hurts like hell, but it doesn't hurt as much as it did when Nam Soon left, so -- he can bear it. Heung Soo forces the palm of his free hand on the ground, using his arm as a support to force his upper body up until he's at least sitting.
It comes with incredibly pained groans and saying his breathing is labored would be an understatement, but even with hair wildly almost hanging in his eyes, he tries to look directly at the other. ]
Then don't.. make that kind of face. [ He can't even manage a "you bastard" in return, he has to conserve his words since it's already difficult enough to get this much out. He's probably leaning quite a bit on the other too because of his hand still being on his arm, tightly squeezing.
(There's something glistering faintly in his own eyes too, but he tries to hold it back the best he can in this state. Which isn't too much.) ]
I'm.. [ He shifts a little and groans loudly. ] Going to be f-fine.
[ Somehow. Maybe they can find some hospital or a clinic or even anywhere that's not lying out here in the middle of the street with the person most important to him looking at him like that. He just has to get up. Even if moving this much already feels like hell - Heung Soo doubts he could even stand on that leg at all right now, let alone into the future.
(Don't think of that, don't think of that, don't think of that.) ]
we don't speak of jae hee okay... don't do it....
[there's a certain snap to nam soon's words; it's not angry or bitter, but no less frustrated. no matter how many times heung soo tells him things like that, he just can't control it. how could he, when he knows that the only reason heung soo is in a state like this to begin with is because of him? knowing that much, knowing that heung soo will always have to suffer that way because of him... what other face can he make? it's not like nam soon just ruined his chances at going pro with soccer, or even just wounded him in a way that he would eventually recover.
it's been three years, and still... things like this happen. a distance that heung soo could have easily covered, and even ran three or four times the amount grounds him completely. he's to the point of writhing in pain. there's nothing nam soon can do to hel him, and in this state, he absolutely can't forget the things he's done.
that's exactly why tears still slide down his cheeks, why he holds back anything resembling an actual sob, and why he doesn't bother to wipe them away. nam soon knows it's uncomfortable. he knows he's supposed to be trying to put these painful moments behind them for the better of their future, for the sake for moving on and making this reconciliation worthwhile, but it's the sort of guilt that just hasn't had enough time to fade yet. even if on most days now, they can carry on fine, the scars are too deep to heal that quickly. maybe there will be a time when things come to this and nam soon holds his composure together. but right now? it's not much of an option. all he can really do is try. try to calm down, try to help, try to assure heung soo that there's no way anyone will be left behind again.
and that's why as soon as heung soo makes an attempt to sit up, nam soon rushes to changes his own positioning. moving away from the pained leg, he reaches out to grab heung soo's arm and steady it. that's something of a wasted effort, when nam soon is still trembling from the panic, but it's all he can do.
"going to be fine?" nam soon has his doubts in this state. his eyes dart around the area, seeking out either something familiar (there's none of that), or something helpful (there's not of that either, at least, not within his line of sight.]
A hospital. [that's what they need to find. heung soo needs to be checked out. something, anything. they've escaped the danger — they can look for that much now, right? there's the issue of how to get his friend there though. he's in no position to stand let along actually walk right now. even if he was... nam soon couldn't let him anyway. all the same, he can't leave heung soo alone to find anything, either.
so he takes a moment, finally wiping away the fallen tears with his sleeve and sucking in a breath. there are more that still threaten to fall, but he's doing his best to steel himself for the time being.] I'll carry you to one.
[he doesn't care how terrible or ridiculous it looks. if giving heung soo a piggyback ride for 10 miles while they find a hospital is their only option? he'll do it. no hesitation there.]
but... hoonah..................................
don'T........ jae.... hee... yah....
would you rather have the muffled heirs theme
i will take muffled hongki over muffled jin se yeon any day
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