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//TESTDRIVE5.0.EXE
//TESTDRIVE5.0.EXE
 Let's keep pretending it's not technically October in the game while Yuletide thoughts continue to spread through CERES. Inspired by recent tragic events, your friendly neighborhood programmer, Elias ( ![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small} serritor) has constructed a wonderful new ice world to be accessed through ViViD, the popular virtual simulator.As expected, this is a world covered in ice all over with a chill that bores into one's bones as players wander through. In the midst of it all lies a beautiful reconstruction of a mall, complete with various stores to suit your online shopping needs. However, before you can indulge in any spending, you're tasked with a mission should you choose to accept. You will have to enter the frost-covered mall which hosts a large, elaborate labyrinth and complete all the objectives as they're given to you and your party. It seems that some horrible foe has arisen from the great beyond to kidnap Santa Bot (no relation to the futurama one). Unable to deliver toys and goods to the poor, needy adults of Cerealia, it's up to YOU to save him from a variety of enemies which include: a.) Nasty, foul-mouthed elves b.) A rabid flock of reindeer c.) An ice queen who will not stop singing d.) And a fucking minotaur. Why? Why not?
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//SCENARIOS.EXE
PHASE I [ 00 PHASE II [ 00 PHASE III [ 00 PHASE IV [ 00 BONUS [ why[ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with trigger-y or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the meme. ] |
00 ]
Let the games begin! You're dropped before a giant forest with snow-covered trees, and in your path to reach the mall, there appears your first threat. They look cute and sweet -innocent little elves that smile and blush in your direction. They barely reach up to your chest and look up at you with big, glassy eyes as they promise to help you along your way. Little hands will grab yours, tugging you along. That is, until you're far enough along that you're deep in the midst of the forest where they decide to chip at a lake of frozen ice and chuck you inside.
//RUN.EXE
Welcome to CEREALIA's fifth Test Drive Meme. For your convenience, we have compiled a post detailing everyone's arrival experience and a FAQ that should explain everything in more detail. Please read them thoroughly before playing. Thank you! |
Yogi | Karneval
[ Everything is new and scary and he misses his friends. And who would kidnap Santa bot? What a terrible, terrible thing. Er, not that he knows who Santa bot is, but if he's anything like Yukkin, the sparkling prince will try his very, very best to rescue him. But look! Not everyone in this game is bad. Tiny elf people tugging on his hand. Nyanperona will be your friend, tiny elf people.
A giant cat with long eyelashes and a bow in its hair toddles off into the forest, accompanied by his tiny elf friends, in search of Santa, precious memories, and rainbows.
...
Some time later, there's a grown man in a cat costume, holding the head of his costume under one arm, floating above the frozen lake, and sobbing. ]
Don't say such mean thiiiiiiings!
bonus
[ Finally, he's made it through this extremely traumatizing game. He'd stood and wept into his hands after killing the ice queen; if only hugging her could have worked, like it did on the minotaur. All monsters should be saved that way. He'd be so much happier...
But right now, he's delighted. Mistletoe-bot is the best robot! So please don't be alarmed by the giant, fuzzy, beribboned cat calling out to you in a fruity voice: ]
Do you want a hug? Nyanperona will give you free hugs and kisses! And candy!
i
It's a good thing that Tsukumo, after her pursuit and defeat of her own potty-mouthed elves, doubled back to the frozen lake. Otherwise Yogi would be a catsicle soon enough. She sets Yukkin down on the snow and rushes towards the bank, swatting away Yogi's elves in the process. ]
Yogi! [ Cue wading into the water slowly, wincing at how freezing cold it is. How can he stand it? And to think that he's crying out weird things too. ] Yogi, pull yourself together and get out of the water.
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Drowned cat!
Fatty!
Lookit the crybaby wooooooooo!
He sobs piteously, tears spilling over his cheeks and turning the water to brine. ]
But you don't understand, they're so —
[ ...
Oh! Oh! He'd thought he was alone in all the world, with every friend he ever knew taken away from him. But here is Tsukumo!!!!!! ]
It's yooooou! You're heeeeeere! Oh oh oh oh oh oh!
[ Sobbing in real earnest now, Yogi puts his cat head back on again and begins to run through the water towards her, his furry arms outstretched. Get ready for a big, wet, kitty hug, Tsukumo. ]
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Yes, I've —
[ Or maybe not.
It's not that she's not used to being glomped and pulled into hugs by Yogi. It's just that the possibility of toppling together into freezing water while being smothered by a furry costume doesn't sound very inviting. Which causes her to sidestep and avoid him entirely, sorry. Maybe later, after they've retreated to firmer ground, shut the elves up and retrieved Yukkin. ]
— been here for a while now. [ Speaking of which!! ] ... What are you doing here, Yogi?
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Huh?
[ He's momentarily flummoxed, before he answers: ]
I... I... they said it was a game! And I love games, so — and I'm supposed to be saving Santa!
[ The other answer to that question — what are you doing here — has to do with their planet being destroyed by terrible creatures and everyone they ever knew or loved destroyed....
...and that is...
(his head hurts. his heart hurts. everything hurts)
...and that is too terribly sad to even talk about, especially while he's dressed as Nyanperona. ]
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But it's evident that he understood the real context behind her question and is simply avoiding having to directly address it. So she's going to leave it at that for now, turning impassively towards the edge of lake where Yukkin's waiting and is currently the new target of the elves' abuse. ]
We should get out of the water first. [ Before she completely loses feeling in her legs and feet. ] I found the path we should follow to finish this game.
[ Or more like, she'd thrashed it out of her own set of elves but details. ]
(no subject)
bonus
So the look of surprise on Natalia's face is the first expression to pass, followed by one of confusion, and now settling on something that is closer to strained, polite denial. She raises a hand and cautiously takes a step back, as if that will put some distance between herself and the very excitable.... creature...]
Ah, I'm quite full from my last meal so.... No candy, thank you....
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[ This sounds like the worst pick-up line in the world. In actuality, if Yogi thought anybody found any part of Nyanperona creepy, he would sit down and weep on the spot. And then apologize to his mascot, and try to do better.
In this case, however, he keeps coming towards her, in a bounding sort of waddle, arms outstretched. Big hug incoming! ]
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It would be rude to run, she thinks. But if he comes any closer, she might just step right out of his path because this? This is not entertaining whatsoever.]
Really Sir Cat, I'm fine! I'm sure there's children elsewhere that would appreciate your attention...!
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Oh.
There are always children (large and small) like this, who are frightened of the mascots; or — sadder still — who think they don't deserve candy and presents and love, probably because they've never known any of them. The idea of that makes him want to weep, and he does, a little. It's a good thing the costume hides his face.
He is feeling.............compelled to hug and kiss her, but he knows that will just make her cry, if she's afraid. So, with difficulty, he sinks down to his knees, and puts his fuzzy hands in his lap and ducks his head, all in an effort to appear smaller than she is. ]
I'm Nyanperona! It's nice to meet you! What's your name?
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I'm Natalia, Sir Nyanperona. The pleasure is mine.
[And she tilts her head slightly, looking over the costume before laughing faintly.]
You certainly take your job seriously, don't you, Sir?
b-bonus :')
...
[Leading a sheltered life in the palace is no excuse. It is no wonder some of Legna's compatriots have started calling the Oracle a fraud. Rude elves, man-eating reindeer, clingy minotaurs, shameless ice queens, and now a giant teddy bear with nothing but questionable intentions offering him candy.
Wouldn't any respectable Oracle see at least a couple of those coming?]
No.
[The single word is followed by the look where creepy mascots go to die. Legna raises an authoritative hand as a barrier between himself and the approaching fuzzy chest. Yes, that's totally going to show the weirdo he is in no mood for hugs and kisses!]
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[ He bounds right past the outstretched hand and gathers Legna up in a warm — and slightly damp — kitty hug. There's also a kiss, except it really just consists of a noisy MWAH! noise and Nyanperona's fuzzy mouth pressed against the top of your head, Mister Grumpy Person. ]
Turn that frown upside down!
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WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
[No, really. What is wrong with his personal space that people keep ignoring it?]
Besides, you can't just turn a frown upside down! A frown is a frown!
[Legna starts squirming in the warm and damp embrace like a dying fish. A very stubborn dying fish with no military training whatsoever, punching Nyanperona's fluffiness with flimsy courtier fists. Sorry, Nyanperona. Mister Grumpy Person didn't have a proper childhood. He is not ready for your candy just yet.]
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Why, it's a hug!
[ He bounds back a little, and then executes a pirouette, ending with his arms wide and his head cocked to one side. ]
A hug is something you do for precious people, who are special to you!
[ Yogi is fairly certain his new friend doesn't get enough hugs. He jumps and does a backflip, landing neatly on his feet, remarkably nimbly for a cat his size. ]
And you turn a frown upside-down with a smile! ☆
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Precious? We have just met!
[He is about to question Yogi's logic further when the backflip happens.
Oh.]
...
[Okay, that is not something he sees every day.]
i.
So he pauses a few feet away and just. Stares. ]
Of course, they're going to make fun of you! Why are you wearing that ridiculous thing?! Take it off and leave it somewhere!!
[ He's with the elves here, Yogi. That outfit is too stupid and impractical to game in. ]
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Ga —
[ And he's cold, so: ]
G-G-G-G-G-Garekiiiiii!
[ He has his Circus bracelet on, so he soars up into the air and lands in front of Gareki, big kitty arms outstretched. ]
I'm sorry, were you scared? It's okay, I"m here now. Come here and get a hug!
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Why are you asking me that?! You're the one who was wailing just a second ago! What did you even do to piss those elves off?
[ He assumes just existing probably set them off. Yogi has that sort of presence that would drive anyone insane. ]
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Garek-k-k-k-ki!
[ Thus arrested by Gareki's outstretched hand, Yogi swipes at him ineffectually with his big fuzzy paws. And shivers. Ice water is cold, who knew? ]
I didn't do anythiiiiiing! They just started saying terrible things for no reason!
[ It's at this point that the evil elves come toddling over, giggling into their beards and shouting behind their hands:
Hey! Hey four-eyes!
Nice goggles! Want to go for a swim?
Heh heh heh heh!
Yogi rounds on them, shouting: ]
Don't say that about my friend!
1/2
Gareki's body freezes, and he abandons the abuse of Yogi's face for a moment to glance back slowly at the elves. Did they just call him 'four-eyes'? Furthermore, did they just threaten to dump him in the water like they did Yogi?
His lips slowly curve into a grin, though it's far from a pleasant and welcoming one. He turns around completely to face them before cracking one set of knuckles and looking down at the puny collection of elves, sure he can take them all at once. What does he have to be afraid of? They barely reach passed his chest. ]
Oi, why don't you come a little closer and say that again? I don't think I heard you from all the way up here.
2/2
bonus!
T-T-This is some sort of trick isn't it?! [ Even if he isn't a youmu, who would walk around looking that adorable and not be suspicious. Quickly reaching for her phone, she must
blog
about this unpleasant event. ]
'What kind of person would walk around dress in a over-sized cat costume. Even if they do that at amusement parks, doing it here is weird and unpleasant. Maybe they're trying to lure children into someplace suspicious... or worst! They' — [ And due to nerves, she drops the phone. It slides near Yogi much to Mirai's horror. ]
... How unpleasant.
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In any case, he capers back and forth, little ruffled collar fluttering, and then executes a perfect backflip before dropping to one knee and exclaiming: ]
The soaring male's spirit! The heart-throbbing, sparkling prince! From the country's defense organization Circus, second ship's member Nyanperona is here! ☆
[ ....and then he scoops up her phone, remarkably nimbly considering the big furry paws, and hands it to her. ]
I think you dropped this!
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troublesome. ]
You're being unpleasant! [ Sharp words, although softened by the image of those warm looking furry paws in front of her. Well, it is a little cute. ]
Um, b-but thank you for the phone...
[ When Mirai takes it, she dusts it off, a sigh of relief parting from her lips when she sees that it is unscathed. Then her attention turns back to the... over-sized yellow cat. ]
Is there a reason you're dressed like that? [ Trying to spoil the realness of Nyanperona?! Perish the thought. ]
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[ NOOOOOOOO NYANPERONA IS REAL!!!!! ]
Y-you mean my bow? Or my collar? Ah, it's because I like cute things!
[ He claps his paws together and capers around, setting his collar a-fluttering. OKAY TIME FOR A SUBJECT CHANGE! ]
Who are you texting? Have you made friends here?
(no subject)