//SCENARIOS.EXE
THEATER I [ 00 00 ]
MY PETITE EQUESTRIAN EXPERIENCE - RATED A
Advertised as a delightful tale of ponies discovering magic and friendship, this is a must-see! For adults that is. The ponies are killed within the first ten minutes, and then the rest of the run time is filled with a celebratory orgy of Roman-esque proportions. There are no mentions of ponies after the initial scene. They are neither seen nor mourned nor heard from. There are only naked, gyrating bodies as far as the eye can see.
If you manage to sit through the horror long enough, you will notice a certain something in between the moaning. Is that your face on one of the protags? Is it a beloved family member or a friend? You will find that spliced between the scenes are cherished and innocent childish memories now being soiled by passionate cries of pleasure. Enjoy the new memory, your poor, sweet summer child. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER II [ 0000 ]
LARGE ADVENTURER 7 - RATED B
A touching tale of dealing with loss and more loss. This film is about a giant robot and his pet human that gets eradicated in the Third Robotic Genocide, leaving behind just a human carcass. The giant robot clings to the carcass and cries robotic tears until finally he chucks the carcass into a river full of carcasses and decides to go on a deep quest in search of cheese.
But spliced between this tale of woe, viewers will see images of themselves caught in a romantic memory. A first kiss, perhaps? A first love-making session? A first crush? A desired one will also have their face molded on top of all the carcasses as they flow away. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER III [ 0000 ] THE RETALIATORS: ERA OF RADICALON - RATED C
Agent Dick Angry takes it upon himself to assemble a team of miscreant aliens to invade the hell out of "Planet Earth." The aliens include Zorn, an intelligent toaster; Crisis, a blue-skinned beauty that turns purple when she's aroused; Trish, a rogue miniature ficus with a criminal record; and General Cerealia, a handsome, ripped man who beats evil-doers with his laptop and who looks suspiciously like CERES' programmer, Elias.
This adventurous romp will feature the tragic memories of death interweaving with the destruction of the "Planet Earth." Those who attend will see first-hand the memories of their own worlds slowly being demolished before their eyes and all their loved ones screaming in agony. Then it'll loop itself again and again for the last hour of the film. Enjoy! This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER IV [ 0000 ]
DECEASE HARDER II - RATED D
Jack McJack is a cop who is having none of your shit. In this action film, he will ride around on a velociraptor and go around punching evil-doers and detonating them with land mines. If you want all the violence in the world, this is the film for you. Watch as every second is filled with pointless explosions and every curse word in all the known languages in Cerealia.
Of course, spliced between every action scene will be every embarrassing moment of your life being played out for you and only you. Or is it? Start sweating and looking in every direction as you begin to wonder if everyone else can see that time you tripped and fell on your senpai almost kissing him (sacre bleu D= !)
BONUS - THEATER V [ whyo'clock ]
YARD-DOOR PEOPLE OF QUESTIONABLE MORALS - RATED Z
This is a touching film about tenderness and coming together to overcome obstacles and achieve greatness. The Yard-Door people run into danger when an evil megalord starts polluting the air with negative feelings. The Yard-Door people must band together and save the world through kindness. They will go and help their neighbors get across the street, rake up leaves from their lawns, donate canned food to the poor, and collect toys for children who do not have any.
While this film will draw tears from your eyes, you will see happy memories. The happiest that can be mustered. They will be spliced in with the scenes in the movie, occurring side-by-side with all the smiles and fuzzy feelings leaking off the screens. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
Also, beware! This film contains the angriest of Theater Cleaning Robots. Dropping anything on the floor will result in a bit of a flogging with a wooden paddle and a robot calling you a dirty slut and claiming that you like it. Yes, BDSM robots will not take your bad behavior. You better bend over and start apologizing for being such a filthy, little theater-goer.
[ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with trigger-y or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the meme. ]
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no subject
But honestly after being interrupted from a movie where he was having his own nostalgic moments for happy days with his brothers, it's not hard to motivate Tenka to help a kid out. So he's getting out of his seat rather automatically and sliding in easily to step between Hiro and the robot, drawing his fan.
It looks like a normal fan up until it collies with the paddle with a very metal clang.]
Whoa there! Accidents happen, right? No need to keep bullying the poor kid!
no subject
as for the robot's response, it's been censored for the sake of preserving innocent disney ears; but there's a regrettable use of vulgarities to indicate that, no, it doesn't really think the kid's been bullied enough. cleanliness is a virtue, so it aims for another strike with that paddle.]
no subject
C'mon, man!! This is a family establishment!
[Maybe?! No.... these movies aren't very family friendly at all. But Tenka's not hesitating then to just raise a leg and with strength that is... dubiously superhuman, proceeds to kick the robot right off its legs. Then he's turning to Hiro with a huge, goofy grin-]
Alright, we're running now!
[And without much further ado, he's kind of just reaching to haul Hiro over his shoulder and then haul ass out of the theater.
If Hiro looks back at the robot, he might notice a dent in the metal from Tenka's kick. Hm.]
no subject
We're running, or you are? [says mister short legs. but it's followed by an alarmed:] On second thought, running sounds great!
[that's maybe the clang of metal feet behind them]
no subject
[Though he's obviously joking... he's not really the type to leave kids with weird cursing robots. So yeah, more running and jumping over any random obstacle with a remarkable amount of athleticism. Who is this guy anyway.... But anyway, yeah, running.]
How far back is he?!
no subject
[if he had baymax with him, it'd be a different story, but his luck isn't that good. besides, he's a little better at the whole asking for help thing these days...at least, when it comes to robots that want to smack him around. hiro isn't so found of the jumping over obstacles — not the most comfortable thing when you're dangling over someone's shoulder — but god, this guy is so cool.]
Not far enough!
[clang clang clang clang. but luckily the front doors are near — surely even a cleaning-crazed robot wouldn't chase them outside...!]
no subject
Complaining.]
I really, really hate this place's idea to use robots for chores sometimes.
no subject
[and hiro's dumped back onto his feet, so he immediately makes himself useful by dithering around awkwardly, looking from tenka to the rattling doors. he gets near enough to peer through the glass curiously — seeing for himself the robot's really there, maybe — and jerks a few steps backwards at a particularly violent shake.]
It wouldn't really follow us outside....would it?
no subject
If it does, that's when we'd have to break it before it hurts anyone.
[everyday superhero kumou tenka everybody -- except no, he frowns a moment after.]
But I really hate doing that. They told me that these things don't have feelings or whatever since they're robots, but it's still kinda sad.....
no subject
No...what we need is a new angle.
[he raises a hand to his chin in thought, pacing a few steps here and there as he thinks that one over. the robot's hard-wired to keep the theatre clean and punish people who get them dirty...too bad he didn't get a closer look at it in the dark theatre and, you know, running away from it. the entire outer shell is clearly made of metal, though, so this definitely was made to be intimidating and not as cuddly as, say, baymax.]
Do you think you can break that paddle?