//SCENARIOS.EXE
THEATER I [ 00 00 ]
MY PETITE EQUESTRIAN EXPERIENCE - RATED A
Advertised as a delightful tale of ponies discovering magic and friendship, this is a must-see! For adults that is. The ponies are killed within the first ten minutes, and then the rest of the run time is filled with a celebratory orgy of Roman-esque proportions. There are no mentions of ponies after the initial scene. They are neither seen nor mourned nor heard from. There are only naked, gyrating bodies as far as the eye can see.
If you manage to sit through the horror long enough, you will notice a certain something in between the moaning. Is that your face on one of the protags? Is it a beloved family member or a friend? You will find that spliced between the scenes are cherished and innocent childish memories now being soiled by passionate cries of pleasure. Enjoy the new memory, your poor, sweet summer child. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER II [ 0000 ]
LARGE ADVENTURER 7 - RATED B
A touching tale of dealing with loss and more loss. This film is about a giant robot and his pet human that gets eradicated in the Third Robotic Genocide, leaving behind just a human carcass. The giant robot clings to the carcass and cries robotic tears until finally he chucks the carcass into a river full of carcasses and decides to go on a deep quest in search of cheese.
But spliced between this tale of woe, viewers will see images of themselves caught in a romantic memory. A first kiss, perhaps? A first love-making session? A first crush? A desired one will also have their face molded on top of all the carcasses as they flow away. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER III [ 0000 ] THE RETALIATORS: ERA OF RADICALON - RATED C
Agent Dick Angry takes it upon himself to assemble a team of miscreant aliens to invade the hell out of "Planet Earth." The aliens include Zorn, an intelligent toaster; Crisis, a blue-skinned beauty that turns purple when she's aroused; Trish, a rogue miniature ficus with a criminal record; and General Cerealia, a handsome, ripped man who beats evil-doers with his laptop and who looks suspiciously like CERES' programmer, Elias.
This adventurous romp will feature the tragic memories of death interweaving with the destruction of the "Planet Earth." Those who attend will see first-hand the memories of their own worlds slowly being demolished before their eyes and all their loved ones screaming in agony. Then it'll loop itself again and again for the last hour of the film. Enjoy! This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER IV [ 0000 ]
DECEASE HARDER II - RATED D
Jack McJack is a cop who is having none of your shit. In this action film, he will ride around on a velociraptor and go around punching evil-doers and detonating them with land mines. If you want all the violence in the world, this is the film for you. Watch as every second is filled with pointless explosions and every curse word in all the known languages in Cerealia.
Of course, spliced between every action scene will be every embarrassing moment of your life being played out for you and only you. Or is it? Start sweating and looking in every direction as you begin to wonder if everyone else can see that time you tripped and fell on your senpai almost kissing him (sacre bleu D= !)
BONUS - THEATER V [ whyo'clock ]
YARD-DOOR PEOPLE OF QUESTIONABLE MORALS - RATED Z
This is a touching film about tenderness and coming together to overcome obstacles and achieve greatness. The Yard-Door people run into danger when an evil megalord starts polluting the air with negative feelings. The Yard-Door people must band together and save the world through kindness. They will go and help their neighbors get across the street, rake up leaves from their lawns, donate canned food to the poor, and collect toys for children who do not have any.
While this film will draw tears from your eyes, you will see happy memories. The happiest that can be mustered. They will be spliced in with the scenes in the movie, occurring side-by-side with all the smiles and fuzzy feelings leaking off the screens. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
Also, beware! This film contains the angriest of Theater Cleaning Robots. Dropping anything on the floor will result in a bit of a flogging with a wooden paddle and a robot calling you a dirty slut and claiming that you like it. Yes, BDSM robots will not take your bad behavior. You better bend over and start apologizing for being such a filthy, little theater-goer.
[ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with trigger-y or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the meme. ]
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Sannomiya Shiho | Zettai Karen Children
[So many movies, so many decisions. Shiho has her bag of popcorn and cold soda tucked up in her arms as she examines all the choices. She wasn't familiar with any of the ratings, but her eyes do settle on the Z Rating and that title. It would probably be too much to hope that it would be a serial killer thriller.
The fact that people were running red-faced out of My Petite Equestrian Experience did make it seem kind of appealing, too.......]
Hm...
[So she turns to the closest person with a smile,]
Hey, which one are you watching?
BONUS - THEATER V
[Shiho had picked this movie solely based on the rating and to say that she was disappointed was an understatement. She was never one for feel-good movies unless they were the kind that completely wrecked you by having your favourite character die at the end.
But then she sees herself at five years old, being embraced by an equally tiny Kaoru. The moment when Minamoto had reached out for her hand and told her "Let's just go."
So it was this kind of movie, huh. She should have guessed even as she saw memories, happy ones of first going to school, her first serial murder case, and she can't stop smiling. She'd get whoever was responsible for this, but right now...
The robots were kicking up a huge fuss.]
Hey! Can't you see we're trying to watch a movie, here?!
[She throws her soda at the nearest robot as it descends on its victim, causing it to turn.]
Oh.
omg (V)
...
watching her. Like a (not) normal person. At present, he's keeping one eye on her and one on the screen, reliving happy memories from his days in the Japan Imperial Army Special Espers unit. Specifically, watching everyone who had betrayed him die horrible, painful deaths, over and over. True, it does make him cringe a little watching the one guy get impaled repeatedly on that steeple thing but... details.
And then he notices the Angry Theatre-Cleaning robot turn, and begin to menace her. In short order, he pulverizes the droid with a flick of his finger and then teleports himself to where the robot had just been standing. It's important to make an entrance, okay? ]
Empress. Are you all right?
gasp! a lolicon!!
You'd think he hadn't just saved her by the way she frowns at him. She isn't threatening him just yet if only because while he was a lolicon who was going around calling her Empress of all things, she knew that he was also sweet, black-haired Kyousuke somewhere on the inside. Deep, deep, deep on the inside.
And was he trying to make an entrance? He was totally trying to make an entrance. She crosses her arms, unimpressed.]
Of course I am, you stalker.
[Because that was the only explanation she could think of as to why he was here of all places.
who are you calling a lolicon!!!!!
How cold, Empress. You could at least —
[ And this is when everyone within earshot says SHHHH! He flinches, scowls, looks 'round, and then stuffs his hands in his pockets. ]
Mind if I sit down?
[ He slides into the seat next to her without waiting for a reply (because he knows what it's going to be). ]
there's only one lolicon here, you lolicon!!
But the petty smugness she feels is short-lived when he sits right next to her.
She lowers her voice to a furious whisper because even though he was the one who got shushed (not her) she didn't want to get in trouble either.]
Yes, I mind! What if I catch your lolicon germs?!
1/3
Don't say things that will cause a misunderstanding! I'm —
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You've grown.
[ At this distance, even sitting down, he can tell that she's a little taller than she was the last time he saw her. Because he knows the Children's heights to a millimeter and he keeps exquisitely detailed growth charts.
what? ]
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[Wait. He. What.
Ew. EW.
Shiho wasn't sure what was worse, the fact that he knew she'd grown somehow (she didn't want to know how because she wasn't sure the thought of Kaoru or Kyousuke could stop her from threatening him with a gun) or the fact that he was looking like some kind of proud grandparent.
How far can she lean back on this theatre chair? She doesn't know but she intends to find out while giving him the most disgusted face that she can manage.]
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His expression clouds for an instant, before he rearranges his features into a milder expression and asks: ]
How is your condition, physically?
[ because that's not a creepy question, at all. ]
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That's none of your business, you lolicon. Stop looking at me with your lolicon eyes.
[And she has doesn't like the way his expression clouds for an instant, either. She contemplates throwing her popcorn at him but wonders if that would actually help at all.]
1/?
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d'awwww! ]
done!
His eyes flick down to her finger. That's a new limiter; a much stronger one, he guesses. ]
Speaking of lolicons, Minamoto isn't here, is he?
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Shiho notices the way he looks down at her finger and if this were happening when she was younger she'd probably have threatened him. As it is, all she does is narrow her eyes, proving just how much she did trust him. Even though he was a lolicon. And a pervert. And she wouldn't trust him to stop being either of those things. But still.]
Minamoto-san's not a lolicon, you pervert.
1/2
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1/2
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ticket booth! (also can I say, I am so happy to see a Shiho player!)
Hm? [He automatically turned towards them-] Oh, I was thinking of- [-and his eyes landed on Shiho. It took a slow, split second for recognition to dawn. He may've stared a bit stupidly too] ... you?
[Well, there was a person he didn't think he'd bump into here]
ahhh, I forgot to say that I'm happy to see an Andy player, too! ;n;
She can guess, from the way he stares, that he's surprised and that it's that surprise that makes him say things that could be taken in a very suspicious light. And hey, he was the one taking care of Yuri-chan, right? He was a good guy.
But that didn't mean she couldn't still tease him mercilessly. She raises her eyebrows at him.]
Oh? I'm flattered. But I really don't think our series needs anymore criminals going after underage girls.
fistbump!
Hey, come on, I'm not a criminal anymore. I'm an upstanding citizen, now. [Princess Sophie's personal corporate slave in fact! It... wasn't much of a step up from being PANDRA's dogsbody, to be honest- wait a minute] And I'm not a lolicon either! Don't try to compare me to that old-
[He stopped, then suspiciously looked around as if expecting a certain someone to be summoned by his badmouthing (it had happened before, with painful results), before continuing in a low mutter;]
... that old pervert.
high-five!
Almost, until she sees him looking around. And there only needs to be a mention of an old pervert for her to know who he's talking about. She crosses her arms, immediately on the defensive. As if she'd be afraid of some old pervert-lolicon with a school uniform fetish. She'll badmouth him until he shows up.]
You'd better not be a lolicon, if you know what's good for you. You don't want to end up old and balding and with a middle school uniform fetish.
[Being Hyoubu is like being a disease, as far as Shiho is concerned.]
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I don't think he's balding...
[But, who knew with him? Maybe he wore a toupée, or was using clever hypno? Andy's expression became somewhat weirded out as he imagined it, and then quietly purged it from memory. That was too creepy]
Er, I mean, don't worry. I can safely say, one hundred per cent, that middle schoolers aren't my type. At all.
[End of. But this topic of lolicons was making him sweat a little, if only because it rose the chance of summoning Hyoubu, so he quickly changed the subject]
Anyway, are you here alone? The others aren't with you?
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But he does admit that Hyoubu is old. And has a middle school uniform fetish. (Although Shiho, as a newly-minted high school student, was now of the opinion that maybe that guy just had a weird school uniform fetish.)]
He's definitely balding.
[She doesn't know if Hyoubu really is, but if he wasn't she'd keep saying it until it came true. Never underestimate how petty an ESP user can be.
And since Hyoubu hadn't shown up yet with all the times they'd already called him a lolicon, she deemed it safe enough to move on to a new subject with a smile. Maybe he'd decided to go and play bingo like an actual eighty-something-year-old.]
I'm here by myself. You look like you're here by yourself too, huh. I thought you'd be more popular.
[Since he was in the anime and everything. Taking over their screen-time.]
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[Taking over their screen-time he might be, but he wasn't as iconic as The Children (plus he couldn't pull off those cute uniforms to save his life...)! Alas, his popularity existed only on certain websites that shall not be named. No adoring fans here]
Ah, no, I'm not, really. [Wait, that made him sound like a loser] But I like going to the cinema by myself anyway, so... [Ahem!]
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Shiho isn't sure which is funnier: the fact that he wasn't popular or the fact that he was going to the cinema all by himself.
She almost bursts out laughing but manages to rein it in.]
Hinomiya-san.........th-that's so funn-...I mean. Sad.
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Yeah. Sad. [Andy stared at her dully, obviously put out] I can just see you brimming with sympathy. Thanks.