//TESTDRIVE4.0.EXE

[reparator]

//TESTDRIVE4.0.EXE MOONFESTCON 2014 PART I: Embracing Lunacy It's that time of the season to praise the two moons of Cerealia. As they hang in the sky, looking harmless and moon-like, the robots and CERES staff have gathered together to prepare a fanciful celebration. It's primarily located in the Pleasure District where paper lanterns hang and where fireworks are starting to burst in the sky. Everyone is welcome to dress up and enjoy an evening of fantastic pleasures, platonic or otherwise. "Good evening! As always, I'm pleased you all can join me. Do enjoy all the beverages being passed around along with the many services we have to offer, all there for your pleasure. Take time to play in one of our many booths or just slip away and have a crazy evening. The moons bid it. Don't be shy."

//SCENARIOS.EXE PHASE I [ 1900 ] The festival begins promptly with a kick-off speech and a toast from Julius Vincere, encouraging everyone to celebrate beneath the two moons as they light the sky. The weather is crisp and beautiful, leaving them both in full view as their light cascades upon the festival. Around the district, there are several stands full of standard fair food (candy apples/corn dogs/ice cream/deep fried everything), games, and an assortment of many awkward prizes (if you're wondering what these are, do remember you're in the Pleasure District!). Also, there is alcohol everywhere, served to minors and adults alike. PHASE II [ 1945 ] The music is playing loudly beneath the noises of the festival. Anyone approaching the speakers will notice a strange buzzing noise that keeps wavering. Then, the sound changes abruptly to the sound of pained moaning hidden within the song. It grows more pronounced by the second until the lights in the Pleasure District flicker off for a brief second. When they return, there is someone crawling out of the speaker. Your eyes squint, and you can see them briefly, the faint outlines of their form as their screaming escalates, only everyone else seems to be deaf to it. Only you can hear it, and you wonder how and why no one else is reacting. Is it just you? Are you hallucinating? Better get used to that feeling in Cerealia. PHASE III [ 2000 ] Your friendly speaker friend up there doesn't seem to want to go away. (S)he keeps crawling out and disappearing throughout the evening, but it's easier to ignore as Julius takes to the stage. He has a special announcement for all. CERESdate (who sponsored this wonderful festival by the way) has agreed to set up all you vibrant, sexy Cerealia singles with some robot partners for the night. Want to escape? Too late. They're latching on and dragging you out to the dance floor to boogie down. Afterwards, they'll try and drag you to the nearby hotels for some extra loving. You are welcome to run at this point or comply happily. PHASE IV [ 2103 ] Have you escaped the overzealous sex robots? Good, good! Now, it's time for the real fun. The holograms turn from PG images of the stars and surrounding moons and planets to a few fun images of various robot couples caught in absolute bliss. You may spot a clown mask in there or two, reminiscent of those who were running around causing a bit of trouble earlier. The images continue to get distorted as the clowns look like they're stretching their necks out of the image and reaching out towards you. The moaning from before returns. Doesn't it get you in the mood? If it does and you'd like to find a partner for the night, a few CERESdate robots will be on hand to help fix you up with a partner, organic or otherwise. They're being quite insistent again because they want your credits. BONUS [ whyo'clock ] Have you ever been stalked by a condom-dispensing machine? Well, there's a first time for everything! These friendly contraptions are set up all over the Pleasure District, waiting for you to pass by before trailing after you very slowly. At first you don't notice. Every time you turn around, it stands stationery. But the moment you start to move, it just carefully rolls behind you. Watching. Waiting. [ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with trigger-y or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the meme. ]

//RUN.EXE Welcome to CEREALIA's fourth Test Drive Meme. For your convenience, we have compiled a post detailing everyone's arrival experience and a FAQ that should explain everything in more detail. Please read them thoroughly before playing. Thank you!

Comments

reim lunettes | pandora hearts

[allweather]

phase i

[This is all a little sudden, Reim thinks, as he's basically swept along with the crowd through the streets. At one point someone hands him a drink, and someone else steers him into line to play a game. Well, if he's already here...

He is tragically terrible at whatever game this is, and after his third try has thoroughly given up. The game-runner isn't so easily convinced, and Reim is presently engaged in a very one-sided argument about where exactly he should be spending his credits. Still trying to maintain a face of diplomacy, Reim hasn't rightly told the man to shove it; instead, his argument tactic seems to be repeating himself:]

I am keeping my credits, thank you.

[He's just saying that same thing over... and over... this works on Duke Barma children, will it work on aggressive game-peddlers??]

phase ii

[After he's freed from his game loop, Reim drifts toward the speakers around the festival only because most people aren't. They're loud, why would anyone stand close to them voluntarily?

To avoid other people, for sure. He needs a break from more or less everyone here, so: the speakers. He even has a new drink in hand.

At first the noise seems like a malfunction - he has no idea how these speakers work at all, it might as well be - but then the sounds of pain start. That he's willing to write off as his imagination, since he's standing so close to these speakers, but—

there go the lights

—and there's the weird creature, crawling out, right next to his spot. He makes a noise of surprise and backpedals, bumping into someone in the crowd and pointing at the - the thing. Presumably he points it out and whoever it is brushes him off with a laughing comment, at which point his voice can be heard over the music-]

I have not had too much to drink, you-!!

[but suddenly #doubt... what if his drink is haunted.....]

phase dos

[cheats]

[ Ciel watches this exchange from the sidelines of the crowd, since he's definitely not allowed to have alcohol, for one, but more than that, he's perfectly happy here on the sidelines, thank you. He laughs a little as Reim yells at the bystander, but it's enough to get him to approach. ]

Don't bother. Half the people here can't see the damned things at all.

[ But Ciel can, so he's here for you comrade. ]

[allweather]

[At least tiny children have his back... Reim's still pretty obviously peeved when he looks around to spot Ciel, but he sort of deflates when the words actually sink in (and when he notices Ciel is dressed like a Rich Boy, honestly). He does spare a glance to make sure whoever that was is out of range before responding. Imagine, Reim Lunettes starts a fight...]

Is something wrong with them? [This is half genuine, half petty. They're clearly blind.] It was so— you did see it just now, correct?

[cheats]

They may be idiots, but there's only so far such a thing can go.

[ Ciel says it flatly, then adjusts his cane in his hand (yes, he does have his tiny cane ok) as he looks to the less than pleasant crowd that's just rude, honestly. ]

There may be something wrong with them, but I can't say for certain. They're not like us, at least.

[allweather]

[What a tiny, serious lord... This isn't a type of noble Reim is equipped to deal with. Where is the yelling and panicking??]

No, certainly not... [He gives the crowd one last slightly pitying look, then turns fully to face Ciel and incline his head politely.] Please, let's find somewhere more agreeable to sit.

[Please walk away from the giant-ass speakers, little sir.]

phase i

[sewayaku]

[ Zara has been purposefully ignoring the games as best as he can, mostly due to the lewd nature of many of the prizes, but he finds himself passing back this way due to the flow of the crowd, to his vague displeasure. However, he's content to let himself be swept along, nibbling at a caramel apple he purchased earlier, and it's pure chance that he ends up near Reim as he's getting held up.

Sounds like someone in a similar situation to him... or at least in one he'd rather not be in. After a moment of hesitation, the rabbit forms a quick plan, steps forward, and claps a hand on Reim's shoulder. ]

Ah, there you are! I've been looking for you. [ he shoots the other man a look - just play along with it - before turning to the merchant again. ] Excuse me, sir, but we've got someone we're meeting -- perhaps he can try his hand again later?

[allweather]

[Reim startles slightly at the hand on his shoulder, jerked out of his (ironically) robotic recitation. He glances hurriedly at Zara - Who—? - but since this stranger is evidently trying to rescue him and not make him play another game, he nods very officially as he looks back at the merchant in turn.]

That's right— It must have slipped my mind; terribly sorry, sir, but we do have a very important person to meet... Good day.

[Now equipped with this ironclad excuse, Reim shuffles back a few steps before turning on his heel to walk away. Come, bunny savior, let us away to the Meeting.]

[sewayaku]

[ rabbitnapping successful. Zara smiles genially, offering a single nod to the merchant before hastily turning around himself, herding Reim off with him. He waits until they're out of earshot before he actually says anything - thankfully, the crowd is actually helpful in that regard. Facing the other man, he bows his head deferentially just a touch, careful not to hit him with an ear. ]

I'm sorry if I've interrupted something, but you looked like you could use an excuse... Am I wrong? [ a wry but friendly smile. ]

[allweather]

[It would be a horrible lie to say Reim doesn't notice the ears almost immediately, once they're far enough away to stop worrying about the merchant. They're right at his eye level, look at them... but unlike some other Victorians, he's too polite to ask.

Glance, yes. But not ask. He manages to look more sheepish than incredibly fed up, just this once.]

No, no - I should thank you. I was starting to wonder if we'd be at it until one of us dropped... [not that it would have been him, but still.]

phase i!

[harepiece]

[Tragically it seems like aggressive game-peddlers are not as receptive to repetition as dukes, so the circle of passive denial and aggressive attempts to rope Reim back into the game fray will SURELY CONTINUE FOREVER...

Or that's Oz's concern by the time he bounds over, anyway, immediately sweeping to the front like a rude brat.]

Hey, this looks neat! Can you let me play, mister? [SHOVING HIS CARD OVER at the game-runner, who will at least have to break in his Reim Antagonizing™ to set the game up for another go, grumbling. Unlike Reim, Oz actually seems decently skilled with it and has knocked over the suitable number of rubber duckies to win a prize by his first try. Probably an awkward prize, wow, but Oz isn't really paying attention and just pockets it with a charming smile, leaving the runner sputtering in his attempt to offer a second turn.]

Okay thanks, bye! [GRABBING REIM BY THE ARM and towing him away... He comes in like a hurricane, good lord.

Once he's dragged them out of the wildebeest stampede:] ...Do you want it? You can have it, I don't mind. [The prize...]

[allweather]

[Mercy has smiled upon him in the form of a small shonen... Reim is glad to be cut in line no matter what, but oh, it's Oz—how nice!! He'll actually hang around for Oz, and he does, with only a few disparaging looks thrown at the game-runner when he's not looking. Yeah, take that...

He even has the gall to look apologetically over his shoulder as Oz herds him away, before they're a safe enough distance for him to look suitably worn out, as usual. He already met his Fun Quota for the day, can he get off this wild ride now... Somewhere in there there's a world-weary "thank you," because this is Reim.]

Do I...? Oh, no- keep it. I don't think I want anything to remind me of that for quite some time... [shudder... and a beat, since he was super bad at it and didn't see any actual prizes:] What is it?

[harepiece]

[OZ TO THE RESCUE... He will accept Reim's weary thanks with a little hum, because this is Reim and his sad old man thank yous are not a reason for fuss.]

I think he liked you! [Or maybe he just liked that Reim looks well-dressed and probably had a fair amount of credits... Maybe he could smell the sensibleness on him and figured he'd be easier to crack. FOOLISH GAME-RUNNER...

At the question, though, he'll reach back into his pocket and pull out the embarrassing second option, because Ciel has one too so clearly they need their matching friendship bracelets. He holds it out on the flat of his palm, head canting to the side a little in confusion. When it just sits there doing nothing, he shakes it, tries to twist it open, and then shrugs.]

Maybe it's some sort of puzzle game? Things from the future are really weird.

[allweather]

[SAD old man, wow, he's not sad!! He does make an old man noise of protest at Oz's suggestion, one that sounds suspiciously like "I would rather not." Reim's very good at oddly specific protest noises, of course.

The prize is a merciful distraction (not for long) from his gaming disaster. He watches Oz mess with it and has no more idea what it really is, himself... It's not a hand crank torture device, what could it be??]

A puzzle game... [um] I'm not sure... It doesn't look as if it does much of anything.

phase i

[changeably]

[Wow.... Someone looks like they're in trouble.

Babysitter Reim lives on, as there is (what looks like) a young child moseying his way over, moving to plant himself between Reim and the counter to make it harder to keep on arguing. Everyone else is having a nice time, and there's been enough fighting recently for him to want to break things up before anyone gets aggressive.]

Do you not enjoy games, sir?

[allweather]

[Reim's collection of tiny kids continues to grow. He's actually zoned himself out so hard that he's about to repeat himself again, before he realizes that was a different question and a different person altogether. He blinks; behind Cynbel, the game-runner looks like he's about to try again before he realizes there are other people in this line and finally gets lost...]

I— don't enjoy wasting my money. [he glances up at the game booth, regretting even doing it a few times] To be quite honest, I'm terrible at this kind of thing.

[He doesn't get to go to carnivals much, okay.]

[changeably]

[Now that the game-runner's busy with other people, Cynbel waves Reim over, so they can move out of the range of the crowd looking to play.]

I see! You must not come to these sorts of festivals often, then.

[He didn't want to embarrass himself, huh? Cynbel smiles, though he tries to make it sympathetic-looking.]

But it's not very rude if you just keep walking after declining, you know. Otherwise, you'll be bothered like that repeatedly, and where's the fun in that?

[allweather]

[He would rather be inside, in a quiet room, preferably with another powerpoint presentation. Let him go back to that room, he liked it there...

He does follow without protest, of course, as even the prospect of nosy children is better than that fiasco.]

Yes, well, he didn't seem to mind holding up his own line. The merchants here are unnaturally demanding, if you ask me.

phase ii

[mermaiding]

Shoo, shoo! [Mermaid to the rescue! She shoos the person off with a handwave and a glare. It's not so much to help Reim out, but if he's loud enough to hear him over everything else then it's annoying.]

Humans do not see what they do not want to see, and the ones here are even worse. Do not waste breath on them. [She eyes him, trying to decide if he's human, since that will color how she handles everything else in this conversation. Apparently deciding he at least looks human enough,her expression becomes more arrogant.]

At least you noticed. Good, for human. But do not bother trying to warn others. Probably do not care. [Good vote of confidence there.]

[allweather]

[He has great lungs, okay. It's a talent. He's surprised by her sudden appearance all the same, looking between her and the affronted other guest as they're sent off.

She's certainly brash... and doesn't seem to care much for how human he is, apparently? That's odd; she looks human to him. (He keeps this thought to himself.)]

Well— thank you, all the same. [yeah it was totally to help him, what are you talking about??] Pardon, but why wouldn't they care about something like that? I'm fairly certain it takes more than indifference to will something out of existence-!

[mermaiding]

Welcome. [Well she'll take the thanks anyhow. Maybe it'll make him feel like he owes her or something.

She tilts her head at the question.] Heard noises, yes? Perhaps they just could not hear or see it. Maybe only people not from here can.

[SHRUG.] Or perhaps you are crazy or drank too much. Which would you rather believe?

[allweather]

[It... might... He'll make her a powerpoint.

Still, he does bristle when she brings up his imaginary drunkenness again.]

I am perfectly sane, thank you very much. [huff] Then what is it? Is it from somewhere else, like us?

[Solve this mystery with him.]

phase ii

[constricted]

[ Why is no one else reacting to the scary monster thing. Is Nadeko supposed to be an underworld detective now? No, it must be that. Once you encounter an oddity, oddities will be drawn to you. This is usually the job of Meme or Koyomi though, so she doesn't want to be troubled by happenings such as this. Oh well, it's not like she ever had a sense of responsibility. But what if it's just her imagination and she's going crazy—

Oh, he reacted. She finds relief in how she isn't

the main character of a supernatural manga. ]

Um... D-do you know how to use your spirit gun?

[ With her head bowed slightly, she approaches Reim with caution like she would a stranger—or a monster. ]

[allweather]

[Reim, for his part, is still stuck on that brush-off... how rude... He looks up from frowning at his drink when someone asks him a question. There's a slight pause before he answers, because of how she's so cautious - but he can't really blame her, after seeing that creature crawling around.

Ah, but also-] My- what?

[So, no.]

[constricted]

[ Nadeko can't help but feel a little disheartened by the fact that no one was even remotely Koyomi-like in this place. ]

Ah, um, s-sorry.

[ He didn't even come up with a good pop culture-flavored retort. For shame. She looks down, wondering if it's even worth bringing it up now. ]

... The creature... in the speakers... [ She sees it. ] Nadeko was wondering if it was an illusion.

eons later

[allweather]

[Pop culture is difficult for faux-Victorians - especially the workaholic kind. Even if he understood, he wouldn't be fun about it...

He brushes it off, anyway. It's more important that someone else can see the... thing.]

Oh— Then, you saw-? Good. [beat] Well, in the loosest sense...

It- I don't think it was an illusion. Unless we're both seeing imaginary things.