Welcome to CERES' new dating experience -- ABOMIDate (Catchy, huh?). They've found that they're a little concerned with everyone's ability to... connect with denizens of different species, and in a place like Cerealia that is full of aliens, that's a Big Problem! After all, it's pretty clear by now that there are a lot of things about your friendly neighborhood aliens that you just know nothing about. What else do you not know? That the greeting of a Faswwg is face licking? That feathered species require mating dances to woo? That [REDACTED] needs [REDACTED] to [REDACTED]? So clearly, the way to fix this problem is...to practice dating other species!
Namely eldritch abominations! In CERES' experience, eldritch abominations really sum up the full interspecies dating way of life and provide you a variety of different species (and orifices) to enjoy.
So it's time to put on some proper music -- no, not that, that's not right. There, that's better. Anyway, time to put on some sexy background music, and woo the monster of your dreams!
 [ horrifying noises of nightmares and despair ]
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PHASE I [ 8 00 ] Welcome to the new and improved Abominable Dating, CERES’ brand new virtual dating experience! The first thing you will see will be a character select screen, because CERES wants you to get to the dating part right away. Don’t worry, there are a lot of beautiful and handsome candidates to choose from so feel free to jump right in! There’s this fellow, or this dashing lass and even a hidden character who is... not really all that hidden if they’re right there to be picked, but there you go!
You have to pick one. There’s no other option, I’m afraid.
And once you do, you’ll end up in a room with your date, dressed up in beautiful, date-like clothing. Unfortunately, everyone else who picked that date will also be in the room with you, also dressed up and prepared for dating.
This is awkward.
It gets even more awkward when your date decides that you look like a great main course. Watch out for those claws/teeth/limbs/etc! Maybe you can work together to take down your starving date, sad as that sounds.
PHASE II [ 1000 ] No dating game would be complete without stat boosting sessions. Regardless of how you feel about your current date, you’re locked into the game now (and hopefully not while covered in the blood of your date themselves, though they just come back even if you managed to kill them), and the game is picking a stat it thinks you need to work on. Either your intelligence is deplorable, your charisma is totally lacking, or your strength is at noodly-arm levels. That’s pretty bad. (It doesn’t matter what your actual intelligence, charisma or strength are, the game might be making things up at this point.)
Because of this, you’re going to be automatically tossed into a mini-game to increase those stats! This will be fun, absolutely. Nothing but Fun here in ViViD. So regardless of what the game thinks you’re lacking, it’s going to throw you into the same mini-game -- eldritch abomination make-over sessions.
You'll show up at a row of dressing rooms, each marked with a sign above the door reading NO INTELLIGENCE or NO STRENGTH or NO CHARISMA in bright red letters. Choosing the right one (embrace your shame) will reveal your initial date to you. They bat their eyelashes in greeting and growl out a very sultry, Will you help me, senpai?
Time to get to work!
You won’t be able to leave the mini-game until the monster is completely satisfied with its makeover, so it’s time to really tap in to your inner fashion sense. Of course, the fact that you’re all trying to apply makeup to the same monster might make this hard, but you can surely all get along, right?
Right?
PHASE III [ 1800 ] At first, you were on a date. Finally, you, your monster, candelight. Everything was going right until... well, you made a bad dialogue choice. They asked you what your favorite food was, you accidentally picked "Italian" (or maybe picked it on purpose which makes this even worse!) and then things went dark.
When you wake up, you'll find yourself in a cage. The room is dark and dank and there's no light other from the crack of a door somewhere up a flight of stairs. You're in a cage in a basement and there's a key glinting on the table right across the room there. Is it for your cage?
Welcome to the Yandere Route.
You might not actually be alone though. The cage isn't terribly big but there's enough room for someone else and if you shift around a little, you'll bump into them. Maybe you should share some woes of the eldritch horror dating experience. Maybe you should try and find a way out! Who knows? But there's one thing for sure:
You're both extremely naked.
Good luck!
PHASE IV [ 1830 ] You did it. You’ve gotten to the end of the game, or nearly. You’ve earned up enough affection points somehow. Maybe it was through the eldritch abomination following you around to trying to eat you or maybe it really, really, really liked your makeover. Maybe there was that thing and the cage and some weird pictures it took -- who knows! But now it’s time for the inevitable scene.
The confession scene.
Except... well, ViViD can’t do confession scenes very well. You'll find yourself there in the schoolyard, dressed in the appropriate school uniforms but...
For one thing, there’s a heavy shower of rose petals. A heavy shower. They’re everywhere. They might get in your mouth and face, they’re pooling around your knees, it's a rose petal flood and you're about to drown!
For another, the eldritch abomination you chose to romance is getting closer and... closer. And closer. And that sure is a lot of teeth, huh? Is it coming in for a kiss or to eat off your face? It’s... really hard to tell with all the rose petals, isn’t it?
To make matters even worse, you can’t move -- you’re locked into the scene until it comes to its proper conclusion. The game is stuck and you're here, suffering through it all. Well, you're suffering unless someone comes and rescues you, but who in the world would interrupt a touching scene like this to do that?!
BONUS [ why o'clock ] You know you have to get dressed up nicely for your date. It's an important one! Third date means third base, after all. So, you’re shoved into a closet, and surrounded by tons and tons of choices to pick from. You're spoiled for choice!
But, well... no matter what you put on, or even if you just elect to stay in your regular clothing, it changes as soon as you step out of the closet to meet your date.
Don’t worry, you look adorable.
It can’t be taken off, of course. So you’d better get comfy, because you’re going to be a pink dinosaur for your third date and... your fourth date. And your fifth. Hell, you might still be a pink dinosaur when it comes time to confess! How... cute.
[ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with sensitive or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the log. ] |
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STFU GORE
And speaking of forgiving, he'd had to apologize to that weird girl.
And speaking of forgiving Lee's friends, the thought of having to meet more of them was leaving Neji teetering between his brand of affection for the guy and that slowly seeping dread of... having to meet Lee's friends.] I should have known you wouldn't be facing those trials alone. [Loud. Blindingly optimistic. Idiotic. What's not to love. But how about instead of focusing on making friends, they find a way to return to the world they belong in? For the sake of the Future
which is currently getting its dumb ass kicked on page 2? Y/N?] Tell me about them. [The friends. Who should he prepare to avoid?]no subject
Ah... Who should I start with first?! Ah, there is Jaune-kun! He is a brilliant young man with golden hair! He has spread wonderful messages throughout the community in the past, and he joined me in learning a truly beautiful song! Ah, together we joyfully sang that bittersweet song of blank spaces, prepared by an artist known as Taylor Swift!
Then... [There's a slight reddening in his cheeks.] I cannot delay tell you about Yuri! [Where did that honorific go.] She is such a kind young lady and she can be quiet, but she truly does have a strong spirit! She has been through a lot, but- but she still does her best to help others, and her smile is so precious! And then...
[The rambling continues on and on. He'll cover a good chunk of the game until he's stopped.]
no subject
He's not looking for an escape, honest. Where was Tenten when you needed her, though, to sock the guy in the jaw and tell him to shut up. But Lee looked so...
oh look, the date's been inching forward, quiet as a... cat...? kind of slinking forward, dragging its belly. Stalking them? It's coming up behind Lee which -thank you CERES- gives Neji enough of an excuse to abruptly grab a fistful of Lee's shirt and yank him to one side. Or to the ground. Whatever's convenient and doesn't get in the way, tomato to-ma-toh.] Hakke Kūshō! [He sends another attack towards the spider and this time it actually hits one of the school's(??) walls, twitching as it falls. Screeching. Sobbing. Same thing.]
no subject
Lee was in the middle of telling the tale of Katsura Kotarou and the time that they engaged each other in hot-blooded combat while disguised as Santas, when suddenly Neji springs into action! Lee had let his guard down, softened by the warm memories of dear friends past and present, so he was oblivious to the monster's approach.
And now he was tasting digital dirt for the moment as Neji yanked him to the ground.]
AWK!
[But with that undignified squawk done with, Lee leaps up to his feet alertly.]
Did - did you defeat it, Neji?!
no subject
I think so. [No guarantee so to make sure they won't have to worry about it again, Neji gestures lightly to Lee.] If you've been in these games before, then how do we get out of them and into that real world you were talking about? [Because apparently Yuri's suggestion that they'll move on on their own hadn't worked out so well the past three times.]
no subject
Ah... Well, to get out of these games, you have to 'log out'! [He frowns.] But, it does not always work right for those new to this world.
[Still, he demonstrates and swishes a hand against the air to make a menu materialize.]
no subject
[Neji, that's because you suck at pairing technology with common sense. And no, he's not scared to try his hand at making the... lights? words? menu screen come up out of nowhere (which had to be some intricate trick at play because it's sure as hell not Lee's doing), but he's still stepping near to look it over instead of attempting it himself.] You're sure the world we're in now and the... colony, Tellus, do exist in the same... realm? [He'd been stubborn about it once before, he'll be stubborn about it now: outside of a genjutsu, he and Lee really shouldn't be able to be together.
Should. Could. Would.
He's got no choice but to trust Rock's word on these things. Sorry for heaping it all on you, Lee.]
no subject
Perhaps you simply need practice. Like with any new technique! [He says with a supportive smile, as he nudges over to allow Neji a closer look at his menu. O may, how personal.]
no subject
well
practically shoving the poor guy out of the way. Body language. Including narrowing his eyes suspiciously at the menu display because] Do it again. [that's how he rolls. He hadn't been paying adequate attention the first time.]
no subject
Do you see, Neji? Now, practice that motion 700 times!
no subject
Which is a mistake, really. Because apparently his afterlife is doomed to be a terrible joke.
A rose petal lands on the menu and presses some button it obviously wasn't supposed to. Neji disappears and finds himself in another ViViD experience, and then.... he's suffering through a powerpoint presentation. All the while thinking, 'Up yours, Rock Lee'.]
no subject
Neji? Neji?! [Tears burn down his cheeks, more raw than usual. He feels like he's reliving it all over again.
Neji's gone. Was he even real this time to begin with? Maybe this was another cruel illusions of CERES after all...
He sinks down to his knees and lets the rose petals cover him for a moment, uttering as he stares into nothing.]
Neji...