//SCENARIOS.EXE
THEATER I [ 00 00 ]
MY PETITE EQUESTRIAN EXPERIENCE - RATED A
Advertised as a delightful tale of ponies discovering magic and friendship, this is a must-see! For adults that is. The ponies are killed within the first ten minutes, and then the rest of the run time is filled with a celebratory orgy of Roman-esque proportions. There are no mentions of ponies after the initial scene. They are neither seen nor mourned nor heard from. There are only naked, gyrating bodies as far as the eye can see.
If you manage to sit through the horror long enough, you will notice a certain something in between the moaning. Is that your face on one of the protags? Is it a beloved family member or a friend? You will find that spliced between the scenes are cherished and innocent childish memories now being soiled by passionate cries of pleasure. Enjoy the new memory, your poor, sweet summer child. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER II [ 0000 ]
LARGE ADVENTURER 7 - RATED B
A touching tale of dealing with loss and more loss. This film is about a giant robot and his pet human that gets eradicated in the Third Robotic Genocide, leaving behind just a human carcass. The giant robot clings to the carcass and cries robotic tears until finally he chucks the carcass into a river full of carcasses and decides to go on a deep quest in search of cheese.
But spliced between this tale of woe, viewers will see images of themselves caught in a romantic memory. A first kiss, perhaps? A first love-making session? A first crush? A desired one will also have their face molded on top of all the carcasses as they flow away. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER III [ 0000 ] THE RETALIATORS: ERA OF RADICALON - RATED C
Agent Dick Angry takes it upon himself to assemble a team of miscreant aliens to invade the hell out of "Planet Earth." The aliens include Zorn, an intelligent toaster; Crisis, a blue-skinned beauty that turns purple when she's aroused; Trish, a rogue miniature ficus with a criminal record; and General Cerealia, a handsome, ripped man who beats evil-doers with his laptop and who looks suspiciously like CERES' programmer, Elias.
This adventurous romp will feature the tragic memories of death interweaving with the destruction of the "Planet Earth." Those who attend will see first-hand the memories of their own worlds slowly being demolished before their eyes and all their loved ones screaming in agony. Then it'll loop itself again and again for the last hour of the film. Enjoy! This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER IV [ 0000 ]
DECEASE HARDER II - RATED D
Jack McJack is a cop who is having none of your shit. In this action film, he will ride around on a velociraptor and go around punching evil-doers and detonating them with land mines. If you want all the violence in the world, this is the film for you. Watch as every second is filled with pointless explosions and every curse word in all the known languages in Cerealia.
Of course, spliced between every action scene will be every embarrassing moment of your life being played out for you and only you. Or is it? Start sweating and looking in every direction as you begin to wonder if everyone else can see that time you tripped and fell on your senpai almost kissing him (sacre bleu D= !)
BONUS - THEATER V [ whyo'clock ]
YARD-DOOR PEOPLE OF QUESTIONABLE MORALS - RATED Z
This is a touching film about tenderness and coming together to overcome obstacles and achieve greatness. The Yard-Door people run into danger when an evil megalord starts polluting the air with negative feelings. The Yard-Door people must band together and save the world through kindness. They will go and help their neighbors get across the street, rake up leaves from their lawns, donate canned food to the poor, and collect toys for children who do not have any.
While this film will draw tears from your eyes, you will see happy memories. The happiest that can be mustered. They will be spliced in with the scenes in the movie, occurring side-by-side with all the smiles and fuzzy feelings leaking off the screens. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
Also, beware! This film contains the angriest of Theater Cleaning Robots. Dropping anything on the floor will result in a bit of a flogging with a wooden paddle and a robot calling you a dirty slut and claiming that you like it. Yes, BDSM robots will not take your bad behavior. You better bend over and start apologizing for being such a filthy, little theater-goer.
[ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with trigger-y or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the meme. ]
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v - /PTERODACTYL SCREECH
Just as she was in the middle of another long string of curses and threats, she and the robot (who has been inciting more and more creative terminology and more violent death threats with each perverse sentence he spews) turn their gazes toward...this guy. Who the hell is this, why does that voice sound so famil--
...Oh my god, it's the guy who sniffed her like a dog no less then a few hours ago back on Sabaody.]
no subject
You just won't stop, will you? There's only one way to deal with guys like you.
[ and like that, he raises a leg for a kick...
before stopping, just sort of watching the... spanking... look, he knows he should put a stop to this, but it can't hurt for him to just watch for a second, right? just a second.
and another second.
maybe a third second?
mO_Om ]
no subject
"Looks like you're putting on your own show... Why don't you smile for the audience, you little slut?"
And that is the absolute last straw. Perona's patience snaps like a twig and she begins to thrash wildly, tears of pain and humiliation and rage running down her face. Fuck this place and fuck this guy. Fuck their whole crew. She'll have no sympathy or thanks for him even if he does end up helping her at this point.]
YOU DAMN BASTARD!! [She chokes out a sob.] IF YOU'RE JUST GOING TO STAND THERE, THEN FUCK OFF! I DON'T NEED THE HELP FROM A LECHEROUS PARASITE LIKE YOU!
no subject
q_q ]
Sorry, sorry. [ sanji's at least finally regained his bearings (sort of), enough to feel sincerely bad about not helping her right away. ] Don't misunderstand, I wasn't standing around because I was enjoying watching or something. [ no one said to begin with, sanji... ]
I just had a little trouble seeing in the dark. [ frown. ] Tsk, if the lights had been on, I would've gotten a better view...
no subject
Picking herself up, Perona glowers at her "hero" and snatches his tie in one hand, yanking his face down to meet hers. It may still be dark, but he should at least get a good look at some of her very distinguishable facial features.]
A better view of what exactly?
[Her hollow ghosts can't effect metal men, but flesh and blood humans are prime targets, and she's in just the right mood to drag someone down to their lowest level. In fact, two of her ghosts appear over her shoulder to flank her like attack dogs. She'll probably have them with her at all times from here on out.]
no subject
sniff. sniff. ]
This scent... I remember it! [ or you could just look at her face, sanji. ] Ah, you're that girl from Thriller Bark! What an unexpected place to run into you again... this must be fate!
[ does he notice the negative hollow ghosts? who knows, if he does he really doesn't seem to care at all. look, there are clearly more important things to focus on right now... namely her. ]
no subject
Perona nearly snarls when he goes about sniffing her again. That, and maybe break down into frustrated tears again. She is in no mood for this shit anymore, and being treated like nothing more than a piece to ogle and abuse...she is done. Her opinion of the Straw Hats was never good to begin with, but the meager points they had are plummeting well into the negatives now.]
...You pig. You're not better than that filthy robot. [She shoves him backwards and beckons for her ghosts to attack, which they do without question, sweeping through his chest with ease. Perona doesn't stick around for the show like she usually does, though, she's already headed for the exit.] Thank you for you help, now fuck off and don't follow me.
[Because if this is "fate", then she wants no part of it.]
no subject
Sorry, I got a little carried away. [ understatement. ] Normally, as an apology, I'd be happy to grant your request. But... [ he pauses, before taking a step to the side, unveiling about a dozen more cleaning robots rapidly approaching from the entrances to the theater. ] It doesn't seem like they're going to just let us leave.
And something tells me it wouldn't be a good idea to let them catch us. [ okay so really he's the one they should be upset with right now, but it really doesn't seem like they're going to differentiate between the two of them. ]
no subject
Still, those things are only armed with paddles (she hopes) and this is a theater. If the bots are coming from the entrance, then there has to be another way out. A fire escape. Hell, most of the other patrons already fled that way when Sanji kicked the first robot into the opposing wall. Smart people.
Of course, she stops in her tracks, and gasps. In her horror, she almost forgot--]
Bearsy!! [She left him in her seat when she was first dragged into the aisles. But like hell she remembers which seat it was after what she went through. What if those assholes find him? What if they throw him out? What if they rip him up first?!] Bearsy, where are you?!
no subject
...okay, maybe they're doing a little more than that, but who can blame them? ]
Bear... what? Is now really the time for that? [ sigh. even if it's not, it's pretty obvious she's not going to leave here without... whatever this "bearsy" thing is. ]
Just get out of here for now! I'll find your Bearsy and bring it to you. [ he should probably be able to figure it out, right? maybe... the robots have already reached him either way, which means he's already busy knocking them away as he starts to search through the aisles himself. ]
no subject
She'll leave them up to this idiot. At the very least he's strong and can drive them back while--wait what. Like hell she's going to hand some...stranger the fate of her most prized possession. But at the same time, she doesn't want to stick around here, and these Straw Hats are pretty dependable when it really counts.
Ugh. Squeezing her eyes shut, she soars off towards the emergency exit, shouting over her shoulder--]
If anything happens to him, I'll never forgive you! [If you need an incentive, cook, there it is right there.]
1/2
[ speaking of which... ]
no subject
[ not that there really needs to be... by virtue of her gender alone there's no way he can refuse her request, crazy though it may be.
no subject
On the other hand, the cleaning robots are getting a little more bold with their swings. The fallen ones are tossed out of the way so more can clamber into the theater's front entrance more efficiently, and taking the liberty to strike at any part of his body with their paddles now, all the while shouting of horrible profanities that could make one's skin crawl.
"I've got your 'reward' right here, boytoy..."
At the very least they're easy to take out given they don't do much else other than swing their flimsy wooden paddles at him. They're going by their directive, trying to punish the miscreant what's making their jobs all the more difficult...and adding to the mess with each robot he downs. Thankfully though, one of them has the bright idea to turn the lights of the theater on, to get a better lock on their target, and the illuminates the cinema plenty...as well as an out of place patchwork teddy bear that is half hanging out from between the seat and armrest of one of the chairs.]
no subject
but hey, if the pretty lady isn't here anymore, there's no real reason for him to hang around any longer either. perverted cleaning robots aren't really sanji's idea of ideal company... and now that the lights are on, it doesn't take him too long to spot the rather unique looking teddy bear. ]
Sorry guys, it's been fun, but I can't afford to play around here with you any longer. [ thankfully he's significantly faster than these things, and while they try to swat at him, they mostly end up just hitting one another. so with a few quick moves, he's managed to retrieve the bear... and with another swift kick, voila, a new exit from the theater.
so much for keeping property damage to a minimum... ] Now how am I supposed to find her again? [ he glances at the bear, but it sadly has no answer for him. ] ...what's so special about this thing anyway?
no subject
But finding Perona's not going to be too hard, thankfully. The emergency exit is really just a straight tunnel with a few locked doors to storage units and other unknown places. Probably where they keep their backup power stores and generators.Maybe even old, unused movies. Eventually, he'll see one of Perona's ghosts, beckoning him forward before phasing through a door on the right.]
no subject
There you are! I brought your Bearsy, just like I said I would.
[ at least he really hopes this is what she was talking about, since she was never particularly clear about that. whatever, he can always just go back if he needs to... even if that means taking a dozen spankings or so. ] Did I do good?