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C E R E A L I A ★ M O D S。 ([personal profile] reparator) wrote in [community profile] ioculus2015-03-07 10:20 am
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//TESTDRIVE7.0.EXE

//TESTDRIVE7.0.EXE

Mystery Science Theatre -3000


Welcome to Cerealia's latest attraction. In an effort to branch into other forms of entertainment, CERES has been slowly patching together films from various worlds to show in its brand new movie theater. So, grab a friend, sit back, and enjoy the newest batch of imported films with a nice bucket of popcorn. As you'll notice from the long line outside, it's the latest rage in the colony, and those tired of the same virtual battles in ViViD are eager to enjoy a little change in scenery.

For those eager to participate, you will find yourself being lead into the lobby by one of the many robotic theater employees. Showing today are five special films, and in the lobbies are various screens advertising them through the movie's digital avatar, Mnemosyne. Allow her to take you on a virtual tour of CERES' finest theatrical offerings.

(( P.S. no actual actors/actresses appear in any of the films. It's all done through advanced CGi-technology and voice acting. ))
"GOOD EVENING, MOVIE-GOERS. I AM MNEMOSYNE, YOUR GUIDE FOR THIS EVENING.

AS YOU CAN SEE, WE HAVE SEVERAL CONCESSIONS FOR YOU. PLEASE PARTAKE IN THE CONCESSIONS, BUT DO NOT MAKE A MESS. THE THEATER ROBOTS HAVE BEEN PROGRAMMED TO TAKE ACTION FOR LITTERING.

TONIGHT'S FILMS ARE THE MUCH LAUDED AND CRITICALLY ACCLAIMED FILMS HAND-PICKED BY JULIUS VINCERE:

MY PETITE EQUESTRIAN EXPERIENCE RATED A

LARGE ADVENTURER 7 RATED B

THE RETALIATORS: ERA OF RADICALON RATED C

DECEASE HARDER II RATED D

YARD-DOOR PEOPLE OF QUESTIONABLE MORALS RATED Z

PLEASE MAKE YOUR SELECTION AT THE BOOTHS IN THE FRONT OF THE LOBBY THEN FOLLOW THE DIRECTIONS TO THE APPROPRIATE THEATER. THANK YOU AND ENJOY YOUR EVENING."

//SCENARIOS.EXE
THEATER I
[ 00:00 ] MY PETITE EQUESTRIAN EXPERIENCE - RATED A

Advertised as a delightful tale of ponies discovering magic and friendship, this is a must-see! For adults that is. The ponies are killed within the first ten minutes, and then the rest of the run time is filled with a celebratory orgy of Roman-esque proportions. There are no mentions of ponies after the initial scene. They are neither seen nor mourned nor heard from. There are only naked, gyrating bodies as far as the eye can see.

If you manage to sit through the horror long enough, you will notice a certain something in between the moaning. Is that your face on one of the protags? Is it a beloved family member or a friend? You will find that spliced between the scenes are cherished and innocent childish memories now being soiled by passionate cries of pleasure. Enjoy the new memory, your poor, sweet summer child. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER II
[ 00:00 ] LARGE ADVENTURER 7 - RATED B

A touching tale of dealing with loss and more loss. This film is about a giant robot and his pet human that gets eradicated in the Third Robotic Genocide, leaving behind just a human carcass. The giant robot clings to the carcass and cries robotic tears until finally he chucks the carcass into a river full of carcasses and decides to go on a deep quest in search of cheese.

But spliced between this tale of woe, viewers will see images of themselves caught in a romantic memory. A first kiss, perhaps? A first love-making session? A first crush? A desired one will also have their face molded on top of all the carcasses as they flow away. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.

THEATER III
[ 00:00 ] THE RETALIATORS: ERA OF RADICALON - RATED C

Agent Dick Angry takes it upon himself to assemble a team of miscreant aliens to invade the hell out of "Planet Earth." The aliens include Zorn, an intelligent toaster; Crisis, a blue-skinned beauty that turns purple when she's aroused; Trish, a rogue miniature ficus with a criminal record; and General Cerealia, a handsome, ripped man who beats evil-doers with his laptop and who looks suspiciously like CERES' programmer, Elias.

This adventurous romp will feature the tragic memories of death interweaving with the destruction of the "Planet Earth." Those who attend will see first-hand the memories of their own worlds slowly being demolished before their eyes and all their loved ones screaming in agony. Then it'll loop itself again and again for the last hour of the film. Enjoy! This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER IV
[ 00:00 ] DECEASE HARDER II - RATED D

Jack McJack is a cop who is having none of your shit. In this action film, he will ride around on a velociraptor and go around punching evil-doers and detonating them with land mines. If you want all the violence in the world, this is the film for you. Watch as every second is filled with pointless explosions and every curse word in all the known languages in Cerealia.

Of course, spliced between every action scene will be every embarrassing moment of your life being played out for you and only you. Or is it? Start sweating and looking in every direction as you begin to wonder if everyone else can see that time you tripped and fell on your senpai almost kissing him (sacre bleu D= !)
BONUS - THEATER V
[ why:o'clock ] YARD-DOOR PEOPLE OF QUESTIONABLE MORALS - RATED Z

This is a touching film about tenderness and coming together to overcome obstacles and achieve greatness. The Yard-Door people run into danger when an evil megalord starts polluting the air with negative feelings. The Yard-Door people must band together and save the world through kindness. They will go and help their neighbors get across the street, rake up leaves from their lawns, donate canned food to the poor, and collect toys for children who do not have any.

While this film will draw tears from your eyes, you will see happy memories. The happiest that can be mustered. They will be spliced in with the scenes in the movie, occurring side-by-side with all the smiles and fuzzy feelings leaking off the screens. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.

Also, beware! This film contains the angriest of Theater Cleaning Robots. Dropping anything on the floor will result in a bit of a flogging with a wooden paddle and a robot calling you a dirty slut and claiming that you like it. Yes, BDSM robots will not take your bad behavior. You better bend over and start apologizing for being such a filthy, little theater-goer.
[ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with trigger-y or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the meme. ]

//RUN.EXE
Welcome to CEREALIA's seventh Test Drive Meme. For your convenience, we have compiled a post detailing everyone's arrival experience and a FAQ that should explain everything in more detail. Please read them thoroughly before playing. Thank you!


manliestmaiden: commission, please dnt (pic#8909044)

eeee soujiiiii

[personal profile] manliestmaiden 2015-03-08 01:31 am (UTC)(link)
[yay! another friendly person! Hungary looks at him with a bit of surprise]

You've never been to a movie before? Ever?
spes_phthisica: (Exquisite music)

It's an adorable badass combo \o/

[personal profile] spes_phthisica 2015-03-08 12:23 pm (UTC)(link)
[Souji shakes his head emphatically, eyes widening as images start to flicker on the screen.]

There is nothing like this where I'm from. I have seen photographs, of course, but images that move? It's really exciting!
manliestmaiden: (hol vagy hol nem)

yes! \o/

[personal profile] manliestmaiden 2015-03-08 10:46 pm (UTC)(link)
[hmmm... maybe this man is from the past! how interesting! and he's super cute, too. Hungary thinks he might look good in a dress.

ah, but where are her manners? she just met the man]


Movies are a popular part of culture in today's world... Well, at least where I'm from. There are always new ones coming out.
spes_phthisica: by tenken_designs (I knew the words of every song)

[personal profile] spes_phthisica 2015-03-09 01:35 pm (UTC)(link)
[The past indeed, and enough of a different culture that he would not really have any objections to a dress, because what is western clothing customs anyway? But today is not for dressup, today is for ponies! Who is letting Poland write this meta text?]

Something that is like a picture and a play at the same time... I can imagine it really must be popular. Especially when they sell candy at the same time. [No seriously, it's anyone's guess how he'll get out of his chair without a candy landslide later, unless he manages to eat it all.] I've never had candy like this before either.
manliestmaiden: (pic#2389862)

[personal profile] manliestmaiden 2015-03-09 08:35 pm (UTC)(link)
[there's nothing wrong with ponies. Hungary is here for the horse adventure, let's be real]

It was really popular in America to buy junk food at the movies, and then it kind of became normal everywhere. [at least Hungary thinks so. she looks at one of the wrappers... CERES Vines] But I think CERES copied America most of all.
spes_phthisica: by nique (You've caused his will to weaken)

[personal profile] spes_phthisica 2015-03-09 10:11 pm (UTC)(link)
[I mean look at those colorful ponies starting to appear on screen. They are adorable. Souji wants to be friends with all of them.]

I've never actually been in America, but I have- I used to have a friend who had been there a lot. [For the briefest moment he looks a bit crestfallen as he remembers that Ryouma is in fact dead, but he immediately rallies as if that moment didn't even happen.] He said a lot of things were really advanced there. [He laughs.] But I don't think he meant this advanced.
manliestmaiden: (pic#5023383)

[personal profile] manliestmaiden 2015-03-10 12:46 am (UTC)(link)
[hm... so these were more of Poland's ideas of ponies. Hungary was hoping for wild horses! but that's okay, she's enjoying herself, making friends, talking in the theater]

Where are you from, if you don't mind me asking? [Hungary has a few guesses, but it's always better to ask just to make certain]
spes_phthisica: by nique (There is no decent place to stand)

[personal profile] spes_phthisica 2015-03-13 11:13 pm (UTC)(link)
[Talking horses are a bit weird, but this is just like a fable, right? No doubt there will be an important lesson taught through it.]

Oh, I'm from Japan. [A slightly sheepish little smile.] I'm sorry for not introducing myself sooner, that's very rude of me, huh? I'm Okita Souji, it's nice to meet you. And where are you from, if you don't mind saying? [Mind, she looks western, and his knowledge of western geography is limited to USA, UK, Germany and Holland, basically, and he barely knows more than the names. But it's still polite to ask.]
manliestmaiden: (pic#8909055)

[personal profile] manliestmaiden 2015-03-14 12:36 am (UTC)(link)
You were not rude. We just started talking, after all! [hm, how to answer that question, though! best to go into it gently] I am Erszébet, and I come from a country called Hungary, if you've heard of that.