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C E R E A L I A ★ M O D S。 ([personal profile] reparator) wrote in [community profile] ioculus2015-03-07 10:20 am
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//TESTDRIVE7.0.EXE

//TESTDRIVE7.0.EXE

Mystery Science Theatre -3000


Welcome to Cerealia's latest attraction. In an effort to branch into other forms of entertainment, CERES has been slowly patching together films from various worlds to show in its brand new movie theater. So, grab a friend, sit back, and enjoy the newest batch of imported films with a nice bucket of popcorn. As you'll notice from the long line outside, it's the latest rage in the colony, and those tired of the same virtual battles in ViViD are eager to enjoy a little change in scenery.

For those eager to participate, you will find yourself being lead into the lobby by one of the many robotic theater employees. Showing today are five special films, and in the lobbies are various screens advertising them through the movie's digital avatar, Mnemosyne. Allow her to take you on a virtual tour of CERES' finest theatrical offerings.

(( P.S. no actual actors/actresses appear in any of the films. It's all done through advanced CGi-technology and voice acting. ))
"GOOD EVENING, MOVIE-GOERS. I AM MNEMOSYNE, YOUR GUIDE FOR THIS EVENING.

AS YOU CAN SEE, WE HAVE SEVERAL CONCESSIONS FOR YOU. PLEASE PARTAKE IN THE CONCESSIONS, BUT DO NOT MAKE A MESS. THE THEATER ROBOTS HAVE BEEN PROGRAMMED TO TAKE ACTION FOR LITTERING.

TONIGHT'S FILMS ARE THE MUCH LAUDED AND CRITICALLY ACCLAIMED FILMS HAND-PICKED BY JULIUS VINCERE:

MY PETITE EQUESTRIAN EXPERIENCE RATED A

LARGE ADVENTURER 7 RATED B

THE RETALIATORS: ERA OF RADICALON RATED C

DECEASE HARDER II RATED D

YARD-DOOR PEOPLE OF QUESTIONABLE MORALS RATED Z

PLEASE MAKE YOUR SELECTION AT THE BOOTHS IN THE FRONT OF THE LOBBY THEN FOLLOW THE DIRECTIONS TO THE APPROPRIATE THEATER. THANK YOU AND ENJOY YOUR EVENING."

//SCENARIOS.EXE
THEATER I
[ 00:00 ] MY PETITE EQUESTRIAN EXPERIENCE - RATED A

Advertised as a delightful tale of ponies discovering magic and friendship, this is a must-see! For adults that is. The ponies are killed within the first ten minutes, and then the rest of the run time is filled with a celebratory orgy of Roman-esque proportions. There are no mentions of ponies after the initial scene. They are neither seen nor mourned nor heard from. There are only naked, gyrating bodies as far as the eye can see.

If you manage to sit through the horror long enough, you will notice a certain something in between the moaning. Is that your face on one of the protags? Is it a beloved family member or a friend? You will find that spliced between the scenes are cherished and innocent childish memories now being soiled by passionate cries of pleasure. Enjoy the new memory, your poor, sweet summer child. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER II
[ 00:00 ] LARGE ADVENTURER 7 - RATED B

A touching tale of dealing with loss and more loss. This film is about a giant robot and his pet human that gets eradicated in the Third Robotic Genocide, leaving behind just a human carcass. The giant robot clings to the carcass and cries robotic tears until finally he chucks the carcass into a river full of carcasses and decides to go on a deep quest in search of cheese.

But spliced between this tale of woe, viewers will see images of themselves caught in a romantic memory. A first kiss, perhaps? A first love-making session? A first crush? A desired one will also have their face molded on top of all the carcasses as they flow away. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.

THEATER III
[ 00:00 ] THE RETALIATORS: ERA OF RADICALON - RATED C

Agent Dick Angry takes it upon himself to assemble a team of miscreant aliens to invade the hell out of "Planet Earth." The aliens include Zorn, an intelligent toaster; Crisis, a blue-skinned beauty that turns purple when she's aroused; Trish, a rogue miniature ficus with a criminal record; and General Cerealia, a handsome, ripped man who beats evil-doers with his laptop and who looks suspiciously like CERES' programmer, Elias.

This adventurous romp will feature the tragic memories of death interweaving with the destruction of the "Planet Earth." Those who attend will see first-hand the memories of their own worlds slowly being demolished before their eyes and all their loved ones screaming in agony. Then it'll loop itself again and again for the last hour of the film. Enjoy! This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.
THEATER IV
[ 00:00 ] DECEASE HARDER II - RATED D

Jack McJack is a cop who is having none of your shit. In this action film, he will ride around on a velociraptor and go around punching evil-doers and detonating them with land mines. If you want all the violence in the world, this is the film for you. Watch as every second is filled with pointless explosions and every curse word in all the known languages in Cerealia.

Of course, spliced between every action scene will be every embarrassing moment of your life being played out for you and only you. Or is it? Start sweating and looking in every direction as you begin to wonder if everyone else can see that time you tripped and fell on your senpai almost kissing him (sacre bleu D= !)
BONUS - THEATER V
[ why:o'clock ] YARD-DOOR PEOPLE OF QUESTIONABLE MORALS - RATED Z

This is a touching film about tenderness and coming together to overcome obstacles and achieve greatness. The Yard-Door people run into danger when an evil megalord starts polluting the air with negative feelings. The Yard-Door people must band together and save the world through kindness. They will go and help their neighbors get across the street, rake up leaves from their lawns, donate canned food to the poor, and collect toys for children who do not have any.

While this film will draw tears from your eyes, you will see happy memories. The happiest that can be mustered. They will be spliced in with the scenes in the movie, occurring side-by-side with all the smiles and fuzzy feelings leaking off the screens. This will only be visible to the viewer himself/herself.

Also, beware! This film contains the angriest of Theater Cleaning Robots. Dropping anything on the floor will result in a bit of a flogging with a wooden paddle and a robot calling you a dirty slut and claiming that you like it. Yes, BDSM robots will not take your bad behavior. You better bend over and start apologizing for being such a filthy, little theater-goer.
[ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with trigger-y or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the meme. ]

//RUN.EXE
Welcome to CEREALIA's seventh Test Drive Meme. For your convenience, we have compiled a post detailing everyone's arrival experience and a FAQ that should explain everything in more detail. Please read them thoroughly before playing. Thank you!


tofus: (pic#7149928)

[personal profile] tofus 2015-03-07 06:52 pm (UTC)(link)
[She's nearly fuming to the point where there would be steam comically coming out of her ears if it was a cartoon. This was something she already dealt with and thought about back home and she does not need some stupid bucket of bolts to call her such names.

But oh-- oh, that blink. This guy is pretty cute! His hair and eyes both remind him of her Senpai and he's pretty cool to come to her rescue! Rise's anger subsides for now.

(And only flares up momentarily shortly after.)]


...It really was an aaccident.
kicksilver: (my dick in a box babe)

[personal profile] kicksilver 2015-03-07 06:58 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Yeah, the bots pretty much know who he is now since he kicked one of them earlier and got banned from the theatre. He's only back in because he's a sneaky bastard. And the look he gives the bots is enough for them to back away and go back to the corners of the theatre to wait for the next person they'll kinkily punish.

So now, his attention is focused on the girl before him. He gives her a smile, since, well, he's a pleasant guy. ]


All better.
tofus: (pic#7149993)

[personal profile] tofus 2015-03-09 02:28 am (UTC)(link)
[She peers around him and watches the bots leave with a quiet, curious look. They didn't put up much of a fight now. Rise wonders why.

But it's not something she'll dwell on now, sighing in relief and relaxing when they go back to their corners. She's still miffed at the whole scene and the name they called her, but there's an attempt to smile when Mercury looks at her.

...He really is cute...]


Thanks. I still don't know what I did wrong, but you're a lifesaver! [Except for insinuating that she could be a slut... but that was used in her defence. Sorta.]

Did you deal with those things before? [Maybe he knows why they're going apeshit.]
kicksilver: (015)

[personal profile] kicksilver 2015-03-09 02:52 am (UTC)(link)
That's the thing! [ He raises his arms wildly in the air, then points at Rise. ] You did nothing wrong. They're just a bunch of jerks who wanna pick on the innocent people. [ A beat. ] Like you.

[ Then he looks back at the robots, in case some of them were still around. But thankfully, they've trailed off. So back to the girl. ]

I dealt with them earlier. They were doing the same thing, and I decided to join the party. Ended up kicking their ass.
tofus: (pic#7149992)

[personal profile] tofus 2015-03-13 12:07 am (UTC)(link)
[Maybe he's got a point, but it still makes her a touch wary. They could have malfunctioned with the way they were talking to her. She sighs.] I hope someone reprograms them soon then. No one deserves to be called those kinds of names.

[Except for really, really terrible people... or Adachi.]

Well, I'm glad you came to my rescue then. [She giggles, holding her hands together behind her back.] My name's Rise. What's your's?
kicksilver: (so take off the top)

[personal profile] kicksilver 2015-03-13 02:28 am (UTC)(link)
My name's Mercury Black.

[ Sounds so much like a codename, but that's his real name! He offers his hand for a shake. ]

It's nice to meet you, Rise. Unique name, I gotta say.
tofus: (pic#7149993)

[personal profile] tofus 2015-03-13 03:22 am (UTC)(link)
[It does sound like a codename! Or a superhero name, like it could be right out of Featherman.

She shakes his hand with a giggle, raising an eyebrow.]
Hey, I was about to say that! I've never heard of someone having a name like yours.

[Except maybe in America. But even then, it sounds too farfetched to be American.] Nice to meet you too, Mercury-san.
kicksilver: (you know it's christmas)

[personal profile] kicksilver 2015-03-13 03:30 am (UTC)(link)
I guess. Our names have to be like a colour, or sound like one.

[ shrugs his shoulders. ] Parents, right?

[ he'd also like to ask about the -san thing, but he can do that later. there's lots of time for a conversation. ]
tofus: (pic#7149955)

[personal profile] tofus 2015-03-13 06:34 pm (UTC)(link)
Colour, huh? [She smiles at that. A couple of names in Japanese are like that, especially in animes.]

I dunno. I think it's kinda neat. Where I come from, names usually have a meaning anyways. Having one inspired by a colour is unique, plus there's a ton of colours out there, too.

[A giggle.] Of course, there are some colours that should never be considered names. I'd hate to be Orange. That name wouldn't suit anybody.
kicksilver: (wow)

[personal profile] kicksilver 2015-03-13 09:31 pm (UTC)(link)
[ That earns a chuckle. ] You don't have to be named Orange. If you were named Sunny, then I think that'd be much better.

So, what's Rise mean?