PHASE I [ 9 00 ] You open your eyes, and there is a chicken pecking at your face. It's not a very happy chicken, either, but if you can manage to fend it off, then it will be clear that you are in a village. It is... medieval-esque, in that video game sort of way; the details don’t seem too clear, but if you look to your left, there’s a cow! And to your right, a well! Ignore the clear evidence of modern technology in the buildings such as lights, gas, and 21st century plumbing; CERES is dedicated to authenticity.
Looks like the new ViViD level has finally been released, and everyone is invited to play, whether they want to or not.
The game (because this time, that's surely what it is) will start simple. Everyone begins in the same place and every NPC villager will say the same thing: to get out of here, you have to go through the caves. They’ll shove a stick at you (“take this, it’s dangerous to go alone”) and off you go, into the caves… !
Which are full of tiny rats and more chickens. They will try to fight you, but it’s really not very effective when they’re perfectly small and average (especially when everyone still has their typical powers and abilities -- CERES didn't mess with those at all this time). The caves are winding and circular and maze-like, and to make matters even worse, the only ones around are the other poor saps stuck in this situation.
But if you kill enough of the rats, you’ll get to hear the satisfying level up jingle. Congratulations! You are now level 2. It's probably satisfying just for a minute or so until you finally find your way out of those maze like caves and -- You're back in the village again. Great.
PHASE II [ 930 ] You’re carrying a bag. No matter what you do, you can’t take it off, either; it’s stuck with you through thick and thin. But it is awfully heavy. Maybe you should actually open it and see what’s inside?
The problem is, it’s going to take a while.
The bag has clearly tapped into its true hammerspace nature; there are items for days in there, and they’re all very, very strange. You might end up covered in hats of all sorts, buried in logs as you pull out one after another, or look like you have an odd fetish for pickaxes.
Maybe there’s 1/3rd of an evil turnip, half a piece of pie and an egg.
Geez, what in the world are you supposed to do with all of that?
PHASE III [ 1200 ] Eventually, you make it out of the caves the right way despite the harassment of the rats and chickens and the fact you'll keep perpetually getting lost. Hooray! You come out into a large, peaceful, scenic meadow, with a small river bubbling off to one side, and a house.
You'll immediately notice that there’s a bridge to cross the river, but there’s someone standing in the way of that bridge. When you approach to go past him, no matter what you try to do, you won't be able to. Asking him why he won't move will only get one thing in response -- “Bring me a fish. Cooked.”
Then he’ll shove a fishing rod at you and expect you to get to it. You can’t attack him, you can’t get past him -- looks like the only thing to do is to catch and cook that fish. Time to sit back, relax, and get to work. Or maybe you’ll team up with someone else and be the person in the house making sure that the fish gets cooked properly. For some reason, if you leave it too long it turns right into a pile of ashes.
Weirdly though, no matter how good you are at cooking or fishing usually, it’s as if you’re right back at the metaphorical level one. Any sort of seasoning or effort to cook it faster falls flat and in the end you'll only be able to place the fish in the pan and set it on the stove, whole. This may take awhile.
And if you try to cross the river itself, well... no, really, don’t try to cross the river.
At least if you get eaten, you’ll just respawn back in the village, but do have fun traveling through the caves again!
PHASE IV [ 1430 ] You made it through the caves. You made it across the river (with a slightly burnt fish). You’ve made it to the wide open world, and you can finally adventure to your heart’s content. You take a step forward on the road and --
A message pops up, bright red and in your face.
[ Restricted Area: Members Only ]
No matter what you do, you can’t go past that point. In fact, if you’re not careful and you’re going too fast, you might run face-first into it like it’s an invisible wall (which it is).
Then, just like that, you're back in the village. Again. Only this time, there's a nice, blinking message -- Pay a small subscription fee to access member's content. Oh well. No big deal, you can just start again.
Except then you see a cool sword and when you try to pick it up, you'll get that same message, and end up transported back to the village yet again. And again, with some shiny new armor. And again, with that attention-grabbing NPC over there. Looks like you're caught in an infinite loop here but no matter how much you inspect the pop up, there's no... actual way to pay the subscription fee (and why would you want to?). But at least you have company, because you can't be the only person who thought that sword was cool.
(It was really, really cool.)
BONUS [ xxxx ] What’s that on the ground in front of you? It looks like… some bunny ears? Or maybe it’s a chicken head, or a pumpkin head. Either way, the moment you touch it, you have a strong need to put it on your head -- and once it’s on, it’s not coming off.
To make matters worse, each hat has an effect associated with it; the bunny ears will, in fact, randomly turn you into a cute fluffy bunny for anywhere from 5 minutes to an hour before you pop right back to yourself, whereas the pumpkin hat will, in a complete reversal, turn you into Cinderella for a bit -- complete with beautiful ball gown and the ability to talk to all of those cute fluffy bunnies.
Also the rats will love you, so maybe you should go back to the caves again.
Meanwhile, the chicken hat won't transform you into any odd creature, but it will inspire in the people wearing them a very real, persistent desire to build a nest. This will involve picking up twigs, trash, shiny things and whatever else catches your eye to try to build a nest out of it. You'll also try to pick up whatever food you find on the ground to eat, have the weirdest desire to lay an egg, and basically have all sorts of odd chicken-like instincts inflicted upon you.
At least you look festive!
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phase ii! my dog :))) always good at finding ur master i see :)
But honestly is it really necessary to cry about it? So here's Hijikata staring at Kotori who is having her breakdown, and crosses his arms… Yeah, he's not happy. ]
Oh, you're not the only one spilling everything, do you really have to cry about it? Geez…
[ But… Ah… Why does she seem so familiar. Dangit, he needs a closer look. It's so hard to tell nowadays, is it the real thing or is ViViD playing nasty tricks? ]
Hey, lift up your head already. [ Voice flat and to the point. Sounding more like an order rather than a request. ]
u know when a nintendog runs away from home bc u didnt feed it enough. yeah.
[ It's part comfort, part terror realising she's been a sobbing wreck in front of the infamous Demon Vice-Commander yet... Part a piece of home, as strange as that might sound. Still terrifying, mind you. She scrambles to her feet after a moment, trying to compose herself despite her puffy eyes, flowers still clutched in her hands. She's got to retain at least some dignity, or at least try to. The quicker she stops crying the better when it comes to him. ]
It really is you, Hijikata-san? Not one of these... NPCs...? [ Well, if he is he's... Very realistic. Too realistic maybe. Part of her wants to give him a hug either way, but she's not too sure about chancing her survival just yet. ]
wtf if you were a nintendog i would take care of u :(
But he lets out a sigh when he sees Kotori's face (whether the sigh was an exasperated or a relieved one – it's kind of hard to tell!). ]
Excuse me? No way. [ A scoff. ] I should be asking you that, if anything. [ He's been here for a month okay, and he knows ViViD's games... and he hates them, being Mr. No Fun Allowed and all.
Ugh... This last month felt like ages without seeing anyone he's familiar with. He runs a hand through his bangs. ]
Seriously, women are always troublesome... I look away for a few moments... [ A pause. ] Whatever... I got some bad news so you should hurry and get a hold of yourself.
why dont u take care of me as i am then :(
Not at peace apparently. Her joy is, as usual in the presence of certain superiors of hers, short-lived. ] Bad news...? Did something happen to everyone? [ We're delving back into full-blown panic mode, please stand by. ] Is everyone alright? Are they here-- Where are we? [ Okay, yes, she got the basics but, being a sheltered girl (and maybe a little bit slow, only sometimes) she can't really say she understands much of anything right now. And right now, well... Hijikata is the only thing she can understand. Somewhat. ]
MAYBE if you bEHAVED!!! LIKE A GOOD DOG!!!!
And ooh boy, it's time to explain all this stuff. Hijikata rubs the back of his head in deep thought. Where should he even start? He didn't even like to deliver bad news, but he was always the one to do is so... ]
Let's see... This place isn't even real, but we're in it, I guess. [ It's ViViD, he's old, and he doesn't understand this newfangled technology. Wow, Kotori, please enjoy this really awkward explanation by someone that, for once, doesn't understand something completely. ]
It's called... ViViD? [ Another pause. Yeah, he's not good at this. So moving ON... ] But, whatever. The thing is, about everyone...
Well, I don't know what happened, they're kind of not here. [ 'I was told they're all dead' is what he could say but that would've included Kotori, right? She's fine so... Maybe there is some hope, yet overall he can't help but still feel a lot of disbelief biting in the back of his mind.
Sigh. ]
It's good to finally see someone again, but... [ WITH THAT SAID!!! ] You better not run off though, you understand? Or I'll have to punish you. Everyone else is already in big enough trouble as it is, you're lucky I found you this early.
[ :/ ]
I DO UR LAUNDRY AND UR COOKING AND UR CLEANING N THIS IS HOW YOU TREAT ME
Not... here? [ She can only repeat dumbly, for a moment. Not here, not here... But not dead either, right? ] ... I hope they're alright. [ That's all she can afford to say on the matter. She doesn't want to start crying and piss him off-- ]
Eh?! I-I have no intention of running off! [ WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS. ] I was really worried! One day you just vanished and we didn't know what to do! [ If anyone should be getting punished here it's you??? She can't stay angry(ish) for long though, sagging almost immediately after her little outburst. ] ... I'm very glad you're safe though, Hijikata-san... I was so scared something awful had happened.
TIES YOU TO THE TIME OUT POST!!! NOT TODAY, I WILL NOT TAKE THIS SASS
They are, I'm sure. [ A short and simple answer, to the point. He doesn't really want to waste time with 'I wonder what could've happened' to them type of questions, since Hijikata just flat out doesn't know. It'll be better for the both of them if they just continue to believe that they'll soon popup just like Kotori, right?
At her tiny outburst, he doesn't hesitate once shooting an icy glare in her direction. ]
Look, I didn't even ask to be here so it wasn't even my fault for leaving in the first place! [ Geez! He's mad, can't you tell? Yet, he tries to calm himself down and lets out a sigh (though the frustration is still lingering).
At least she knew immediately her outburst wasn't in the right place and time, he could hear how guilty her voice sounds. ] Listen. I didn't mean to leave, but I'm sorry if it caused trouble. If I could've prevented it, I would.
[ It's definitely good to know Hijikata isn't alone though, finally seeing someone he actually knows- unlike the other Souji he's when first arriving here (it still really boggles his mind). ] Honestly, do you think I'd ever let anything happen to myself. Of course I'm fine, you idiot. I've just been here.
[ Er. No, not in weirdo-chicken land. ] I mean, outside of here. In some kind of city... I guess.
YOU ALWAYS DO THIS WHEN YOU KNOW IM RIGHT WTF IS YOUR PROBLEM
... I'm glad you're alive but-- [ Her voice quavers for a moment, but she can't cry again. ] Please don't scare me like that again. [ Not in the yell-y way, in the "vanishing suddenly without a trace" way.
Anyway, with that aside... Outside of here, so that must mean... ] Is there a way to get out of here?! [ Because this loop has sucked quite frankly, and thanks to someone, she doesn't exactly have the money for a subscription to get out of the endless game loop. ] There's a place away from the village and the chickens? What's it like, Hijikata-san? Can we get there? Do you think the others will be there? [ And most importantly, is there dango there? But in all seriousness, she's a little bit desperate to get away from all this and find at least something a little bit more familiar to her. ]
UGH MAYBE BC I JUST WANT YOU TO STOP SASSING ME??? :| LISTEN TO YOUR VICE CAPTAIN?
Well, still, they may not be at the HQ but Hijikata still has his #reputation to keep up? Sorry, Kotori, he still might be slightly mean- but look, he's been worried! Can't you tell he's not being as mean as usual? Okay, maybe not... ]
Ah, geez... [ It's not like he can make solid promises because this place is awfully unpredictable. ] I got no choice but to do my best, I suppose.
[ As someone who absolutely hates it when people go up and disappear as if nothing happened... He wouldn't want to be the one that actually disappears.
With that aside though: ]
This place... Like I said, isn't real. It's apparently a game? [ And he really hates it, mind you. ] What's outside of here is a city except it looks like a city I've never seen before... But it functions normally. Shops, and places to live- nothing too out of the ordinary. [ He lowers his voice, almost trying to be secretive here- ] They gave me this device that can take pictures, and also send messages to other's like mail, but it happens in an instant. A... Communication device, of some sorts I've been told. Although, it's very odd.
[ Please... He's too old for this cellphone shit. At least, Kotori can enjoy this new sight of Hijikata being utterly baffled and curious by technology? But anyway, he shakes his head. ] They're not there, or I would've known by now. We'd have to beat this "game" to get out of here, I think.