[ It's not difficult to understand what Nam Soon is getting at. Not for someone who knows him as well as Heung Soo does - or who's been trying to get to know him well again, anyway, since his best friend changed so much ever since that time, after all these years. Nam Soon usually would have gone right ahead, but since he's telling him to go ahead and first, and to not look back.. it means he's planning on staying behind him. Even though he knows fully well that Heung Soo probably won't have much luck running.
And Heung Soo knows that look in Nam Soon's eyes, that resignment in the middle of the panic and fear, and he knows what it means. If Heung Soo can't run any further, if that thing comes for him, then he will--
He knows this isn't the time to get angry or argue anything, not at all, but he can't help it. The thought that Nam Soon would throw his own life away so easily for his own just.. pisses him off. Does he really think that's for the best? Does he really think Heung Soo's just going to be fine after he gets out of here, even if his best friend sacrificed himself in the progress? He already had a hard time accepting Nam Soon doing anything for him before, and this is an entirely different league, this is the kind of sacrifice he couldn't accept from anyone ever.
Besides, without Nam Soon he's -- he's nothing. Just the way he felt when he transferred to the same school as him and saw him acting so normal, so much not like the bastard he remembered. If Nam Soon is gone, then so is Heung Soo. Without Nam Soon, there's this hole in his heart that tugs and eats away at him, without him, he can't do anything but wander and feel like nothing is truly worth it anymore.
He knows they can't make too much sound, but he wants to convey this to the other guy even so. He has to make this clear, just so Nam Soon won't get any dumb ideas if they do go out there.
In an attempt to at least keep it somewhat quiet, he grabs the other by the collar, dragging him close so he can keep his tone low rather than drawing that thing's attention to where they are. But even though he's definitely trying to not be too loud, the anger is still so easily visible - in his eyes, in his tight tone, in the way the hand that holds onto the fabric of Nam Soon's clothes shakes.
(It's not mostly anger, really, it's fear of losing the thing most important to him again, again, and this time he would be unable to recover it.) ]
What are you thinking, you bastard? Do you really think I'm just going to let you throw yourself at that thing? [ Never. He'd rather just die as well then. ]
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And Heung Soo knows that look in Nam Soon's eyes, that resignment in the middle of the panic and fear, and he knows what it means. If Heung Soo can't run any further, if that thing comes for him, then he will--
He knows this isn't the time to get angry or argue anything, not at all, but he can't help it. The thought that Nam Soon would throw his own life away so easily for his own just.. pisses him off. Does he really think that's for the best? Does he really think Heung Soo's just going to be fine after he gets out of here, even if his best friend sacrificed himself in the progress? He already had a hard time accepting Nam Soon doing anything for him before, and this is an entirely different league, this is the kind of sacrifice he couldn't accept from anyone ever.
Besides, without Nam Soon he's -- he's nothing. Just the way he felt when he transferred to the same school as him and saw him acting so normal, so much not like the bastard he remembered. If Nam Soon is gone, then so is Heung Soo. Without Nam Soon, there's this hole in his heart that tugs and eats away at him, without him, he can't do anything but wander and feel like nothing is truly worth it anymore.
He knows they can't make too much sound, but he wants to convey this to the other guy even so. He has to make this clear, just so Nam Soon won't get any dumb ideas if they do go out there.
In an attempt to at least keep it somewhat quiet, he grabs the other by the collar, dragging him close so he can keep his tone low rather than drawing that thing's attention to where they are. But even though he's definitely trying to not be too loud, the anger is still so easily visible - in his eyes, in his tight tone, in the way the hand that holds onto the fabric of Nam Soon's clothes shakes.
(It's not mostly anger, really, it's fear of losing the thing most important to him again, again, and this time he would be unable to recover it.) ]
What are you thinking, you bastard? Do you really think I'm just going to let you throw yourself at that thing? [ Never. He'd rather just die as well then. ]