PHASE I [ 9 00 ] You open your eyes, and there is a chicken pecking at your face. It's not a very happy chicken, either, but if you can manage to fend it off, then it will be clear that you are in a village. It is... medieval-esque, in that video game sort of way; the details don’t seem too clear, but if you look to your left, there’s a cow! And to your right, a well! Ignore the clear evidence of modern technology in the buildings such as lights, gas, and 21st century plumbing; CERES is dedicated to authenticity.
Looks like the new ViViD level has finally been released, and everyone is invited to play, whether they want to or not.
The game (because this time, that's surely what it is) will start simple. Everyone begins in the same place and every NPC villager will say the same thing: to get out of here, you have to go through the caves. They’ll shove a stick at you (“take this, it’s dangerous to go alone”) and off you go, into the caves… !
Which are full of tiny rats and more chickens. They will try to fight you, but it’s really not very effective when they’re perfectly small and average (especially when everyone still has their typical powers and abilities -- CERES didn't mess with those at all this time). The caves are winding and circular and maze-like, and to make matters even worse, the only ones around are the other poor saps stuck in this situation.
But if you kill enough of the rats, you’ll get to hear the satisfying level up jingle. Congratulations! You are now level 2. It's probably satisfying just for a minute or so until you finally find your way out of those maze like caves and -- You're back in the village again. Great.
PHASE II [ 930 ] You’re carrying a bag. No matter what you do, you can’t take it off, either; it’s stuck with you through thick and thin. But it is awfully heavy. Maybe you should actually open it and see what’s inside?
The problem is, it’s going to take a while.
The bag has clearly tapped into its true hammerspace nature; there are items for days in there, and they’re all very, very strange. You might end up covered in hats of all sorts, buried in logs as you pull out one after another, or look like you have an odd fetish for pickaxes.
Maybe there’s 1/3rd of an evil turnip, half a piece of pie and an egg.
Geez, what in the world are you supposed to do with all of that?
PHASE III [ 1200 ] Eventually, you make it out of the caves the right way despite the harassment of the rats and chickens and the fact you'll keep perpetually getting lost. Hooray! You come out into a large, peaceful, scenic meadow, with a small river bubbling off to one side, and a house.
You'll immediately notice that there’s a bridge to cross the river, but there’s someone standing in the way of that bridge. When you approach to go past him, no matter what you try to do, you won't be able to. Asking him why he won't move will only get one thing in response -- “Bring me a fish. Cooked.”
Then he’ll shove a fishing rod at you and expect you to get to it. You can’t attack him, you can’t get past him -- looks like the only thing to do is to catch and cook that fish. Time to sit back, relax, and get to work. Or maybe you’ll team up with someone else and be the person in the house making sure that the fish gets cooked properly. For some reason, if you leave it too long it turns right into a pile of ashes.
Weirdly though, no matter how good you are at cooking or fishing usually, it’s as if you’re right back at the metaphorical level one. Any sort of seasoning or effort to cook it faster falls flat and in the end you'll only be able to place the fish in the pan and set it on the stove, whole. This may take awhile.
And if you try to cross the river itself, well... no, really, don’t try to cross the river.
At least if you get eaten, you’ll just respawn back in the village, but do have fun traveling through the caves again!
PHASE IV [ 1430 ] You made it through the caves. You made it across the river (with a slightly burnt fish). You’ve made it to the wide open world, and you can finally adventure to your heart’s content. You take a step forward on the road and --
A message pops up, bright red and in your face.
[ Restricted Area: Members Only ]
No matter what you do, you can’t go past that point. In fact, if you’re not careful and you’re going too fast, you might run face-first into it like it’s an invisible wall (which it is).
Then, just like that, you're back in the village. Again. Only this time, there's a nice, blinking message -- Pay a small subscription fee to access member's content. Oh well. No big deal, you can just start again.
Except then you see a cool sword and when you try to pick it up, you'll get that same message, and end up transported back to the village yet again. And again, with some shiny new armor. And again, with that attention-grabbing NPC over there. Looks like you're caught in an infinite loop here but no matter how much you inspect the pop up, there's no... actual way to pay the subscription fee (and why would you want to?). But at least you have company, because you can't be the only person who thought that sword was cool.
(It was really, really cool.)
BONUS [ xxxx ] What’s that on the ground in front of you? It looks like… some bunny ears? Or maybe it’s a chicken head, or a pumpkin head. Either way, the moment you touch it, you have a strong need to put it on your head -- and once it’s on, it’s not coming off.
To make matters worse, each hat has an effect associated with it; the bunny ears will, in fact, randomly turn you into a cute fluffy bunny for anywhere from 5 minutes to an hour before you pop right back to yourself, whereas the pumpkin hat will, in a complete reversal, turn you into Cinderella for a bit -- complete with beautiful ball gown and the ability to talk to all of those cute fluffy bunnies.
Also the rats will love you, so maybe you should go back to the caves again.
Meanwhile, the chicken hat won't transform you into any odd creature, but it will inspire in the people wearing them a very real, persistent desire to build a nest. This will involve picking up twigs, trash, shiny things and whatever else catches your eye to try to build a nest out of it. You'll also try to pick up whatever food you find on the ground to eat, have the weirdest desire to lay an egg, and basically have all sorts of odd chicken-like instincts inflicted upon you.
At least you look festive!
[ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with sensitive or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the log. ] |
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
i died at mama meebo
Just because there's a lever right in front of us doesn't mean it needs to be pulled. That might just activate a trap.
[That wasn't a hard no, Mikleo....]
but where is the lie
[ That's it. That's her argument.
No, wait, there's more-- ]
Don't you wanna find out what happens? Where's your sense of adventure? I bet Sorey would totally do it!
there is no lie, only truth
[He'll argue childishness with childishness.
Mikleo puts his hand to his face.]
I doubt that. He's adventurous and impulsive, sure, but cautious when it counts. Like not pulling strange levers that'll do something you don't know.
[Granted, Sorey has done this in the past when they were kids, but he's not going to bring that up to Rose. Ever. ...Probably.]
no subject
[ She does it. She pulls the lever, and while at first nothing happens... a trap door suddenly opens up underneath them and they fall in a tiny pit. It's not deep enough for them to get hurt, and they could get out easily enough... if they weren't surrounded by large mutant mice! ]
Mikleo, it was a trap!
no subject
Then the mice show up.]
Really? I didn't know that! It's hard to tell in this pit!
[Excuse his sarcasm, Rose. He brings out his staff, pointing it at the nearest mouse.]
Any more bright ideas?
no subject
So now you look to me when we're in a ditch, huh? It's obvious that we gotta kick some rodent butt first.
[ Two of the creatures leap at her, but with daggers in both hands she disposes of them rather quickly. Like an assassin. Ha! She maintains a defensive stance, though, leaving the others a choice to retreat if they wish, or otherwise... did she mention she's an assassin?? ]
See that? No more Mr. Mice Guy! [ Curse this party for starting a pun fad. ]
no subject
[Still, he can't argue with her logic. The mice that leap at Mikleo are met with his more widespread Martial Artes. They're easy enough to dispatch, thankfully.
Then she says her pun and he just rolls his eyes. It's not as bad as the spate of arsenic puns Edna made.
The mice look like they're shuffling around, unsure if they're going to try for another after they defeated four of their number.]
Mind covering me if they try again? A Seraphic Arte might be enough to send them scurrying away.
no subject
[ That wasn't even his point, though. Also, she probably won't let him pull it next time either. ]
Alright, do your thing - I won't let them anywhere near you!
no subject
My hero.
[He wastes no more time in starting to cast Ice Reaver into the crowd of mice. It should be flashy and damaging enough. The seraph puts his trust in Rose to keep them away until he finishes the incantation.]
no subject
[ Come on, Mikleo, join in the pun craze already!! More importantly, she keeps her word and protects the Seraph from any interruptions. Few kicks here, stabby things there, a somersault somewhere in between and Mikleo remains untouched still. ]
no subject
Mikleo finishes the spell and spikes of ice jut out from the ground. This is the last straw for the mice, deciding that these two are just not worth it. They scurry away, rather quickly. He relaxes and puts his staff away.]
Nice job. [He still refuses to join the pun mobile.] Let's move on before they come back again.
no subject
[ She does her typical Tales victory pose as the level up jingle plays. ]
I guess it's a good thing you didn't fall in here alone, huh?
[ She gives him a cheery pat on the back as she takes the lead again. ]
no subject
Could've been worse. We could've ended up in the same situation we were in when you kept trying to kill us with all those switches in the ruins of your former hideout.
[...If he's just jinxed them right now....]
no subject
And then I would've said "May these weary bones find peaceful rest".
[ She sounds so serious??? ]
Anyway, remind me again why the villagers made us go here? This place feels kinda empty, don't you think?
no subject
[Not that Mikleo thinks he'll ever go down a path dark enough to prompt Rose to make that decision, but who knows with this weird place they're currently in?]
They said it's the way out. I'm guessing they didn't mean 'out' as in 'back to wherever we came from,' but more in the sense of 'out of this village.' [He frowns.] You're right, though. The most we've seen have been monsters. You'd think we'd at least hear other people coming through here.
no subject
[ It's not fun being the one to decide such things... ]
It's kinda fishy that the only way outta there would be through a cave. What do you wanna do now? Should we go back or keep going?
no subject
Keep going. Even with the trap from earlier, those mice hadn't been a challenge for us. If things get too dicey even when we're armatized, then we may need to plan our next move more carefully or revisit that question.
[Mikleo's tone is dry as he adds:]
And I do have a sense of adventure. No pain, no gain, right?
no subject
But the way he adds that last part... ]
Pffwhh... could you sound any more forced when you say it like that? You gotta shout it out, Mikleo! C'mon, say it with more zest this time!
no subject
I'll leave the zest to the rest of you.
[Well. Unless there's something for him to geek out about.]
Besides, I don't feel like getting swarmed by giant rats or something bigger by shouting our location.
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
Ugh. Let's just keep going. And definitely no more lever pulling!