PHASE I [ 9 00 ] You open your eyes, and there is a chicken pecking at your face. It's not a very happy chicken, either, but if you can manage to fend it off, then it will be clear that you are in a village. It is... medieval-esque, in that video game sort of way; the details don’t seem too clear, but if you look to your left, there’s a cow! And to your right, a well! Ignore the clear evidence of modern technology in the buildings such as lights, gas, and 21st century plumbing; CERES is dedicated to authenticity.
Looks like the new ViViD level has finally been released, and everyone is invited to play, whether they want to or not.
The game (because this time, that's surely what it is) will start simple. Everyone begins in the same place and every NPC villager will say the same thing: to get out of here, you have to go through the caves. They’ll shove a stick at you (“take this, it’s dangerous to go alone”) and off you go, into the caves… !
Which are full of tiny rats and more chickens. They will try to fight you, but it’s really not very effective when they’re perfectly small and average (especially when everyone still has their typical powers and abilities -- CERES didn't mess with those at all this time). The caves are winding and circular and maze-like, and to make matters even worse, the only ones around are the other poor saps stuck in this situation.
But if you kill enough of the rats, you’ll get to hear the satisfying level up jingle. Congratulations! You are now level 2. It's probably satisfying just for a minute or so until you finally find your way out of those maze like caves and -- You're back in the village again. Great.
PHASE II [ 930 ] You’re carrying a bag. No matter what you do, you can’t take it off, either; it’s stuck with you through thick and thin. But it is awfully heavy. Maybe you should actually open it and see what’s inside?
The problem is, it’s going to take a while.
The bag has clearly tapped into its true hammerspace nature; there are items for days in there, and they’re all very, very strange. You might end up covered in hats of all sorts, buried in logs as you pull out one after another, or look like you have an odd fetish for pickaxes.
Maybe there’s 1/3rd of an evil turnip, half a piece of pie and an egg.
Geez, what in the world are you supposed to do with all of that?
PHASE III [ 1200 ] Eventually, you make it out of the caves the right way despite the harassment of the rats and chickens and the fact you'll keep perpetually getting lost. Hooray! You come out into a large, peaceful, scenic meadow, with a small river bubbling off to one side, and a house.
You'll immediately notice that there’s a bridge to cross the river, but there’s someone standing in the way of that bridge. When you approach to go past him, no matter what you try to do, you won't be able to. Asking him why he won't move will only get one thing in response -- “Bring me a fish. Cooked.”
Then he’ll shove a fishing rod at you and expect you to get to it. You can’t attack him, you can’t get past him -- looks like the only thing to do is to catch and cook that fish. Time to sit back, relax, and get to work. Or maybe you’ll team up with someone else and be the person in the house making sure that the fish gets cooked properly. For some reason, if you leave it too long it turns right into a pile of ashes.
Weirdly though, no matter how good you are at cooking or fishing usually, it’s as if you’re right back at the metaphorical level one. Any sort of seasoning or effort to cook it faster falls flat and in the end you'll only be able to place the fish in the pan and set it on the stove, whole. This may take awhile.
And if you try to cross the river itself, well... no, really, don’t try to cross the river.
At least if you get eaten, you’ll just respawn back in the village, but do have fun traveling through the caves again!
PHASE IV [ 1430 ] You made it through the caves. You made it across the river (with a slightly burnt fish). You’ve made it to the wide open world, and you can finally adventure to your heart’s content. You take a step forward on the road and --
A message pops up, bright red and in your face.
[ Restricted Area: Members Only ]
No matter what you do, you can’t go past that point. In fact, if you’re not careful and you’re going too fast, you might run face-first into it like it’s an invisible wall (which it is).
Then, just like that, you're back in the village. Again. Only this time, there's a nice, blinking message -- Pay a small subscription fee to access member's content. Oh well. No big deal, you can just start again.
Except then you see a cool sword and when you try to pick it up, you'll get that same message, and end up transported back to the village yet again. And again, with some shiny new armor. And again, with that attention-grabbing NPC over there. Looks like you're caught in an infinite loop here but no matter how much you inspect the pop up, there's no... actual way to pay the subscription fee (and why would you want to?). But at least you have company, because you can't be the only person who thought that sword was cool.
(It was really, really cool.)
BONUS [ xxxx ] What’s that on the ground in front of you? It looks like… some bunny ears? Or maybe it’s a chicken head, or a pumpkin head. Either way, the moment you touch it, you have a strong need to put it on your head -- and once it’s on, it’s not coming off.
To make matters worse, each hat has an effect associated with it; the bunny ears will, in fact, randomly turn you into a cute fluffy bunny for anywhere from 5 minutes to an hour before you pop right back to yourself, whereas the pumpkin hat will, in a complete reversal, turn you into Cinderella for a bit -- complete with beautiful ball gown and the ability to talk to all of those cute fluffy bunnies.
Also the rats will love you, so maybe you should go back to the caves again.
Meanwhile, the chicken hat won't transform you into any odd creature, but it will inspire in the people wearing them a very real, persistent desire to build a nest. This will involve picking up twigs, trash, shiny things and whatever else catches your eye to try to build a nest out of it. You'll also try to pick up whatever food you find on the ground to eat, have the weirdest desire to lay an egg, and basically have all sorts of odd chicken-like instincts inflicted upon you.
At least you look festive!
[ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with sensitive or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the log. ] |
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Iris ❀ Ace Attorney
[For one of her apparent size and stature, Iris lasted surprisingly long through the winding maze with such a heavy pack. She equated it to one of her countless chores back home, on Hazakura Temple. The long treks back and forth, usually through an endless sea of snow. Wood that needed to be carried back for fires. Landscaping. And while the thought did briefly bring about a small wave of nostalgia--mostly for Sister Bikini, whom she missed far more than she thought she would--Iris also couldn't help thinking that her years of training might have actually paid off.]
[Physically, that was. Certainly not Spiritually. Not for her.]
[Still, time passed, and the bag grew heavier. An unfamiliar weight plagued by the curious thoughts of what might be inside. When it came time for her to rest, she finally shrugged the pack from her shoulders just enough to catch a glimpse inside.]
[What she saw caused both eyebrows to raise:]
A...hat?
[Not just any hat, though. Of all the styles to be sitting atop the strange pile of items within, Iris had pulled out...a fez. Because...of...course?]
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[Fez secured atop her head, Iris could only stare in slight bewilderment at the large fishing rod now securely in hand. Fetch me a fish, she had been told. One freshly caught and cooked. That would the the price for crossing the bridge.]
[It wasn't the cooking part that had her perplexed. Once she managed to actually catch something, she was quite adept at how to skin and roast it. Even over and open flame--especially over an open flame. One of the many skills she'd learned as a Temple Nun.]
[Of course, before she could cook anything, she had to catch it. Which...shouldn't be this difficult. Except it was.]
I don't understand... [With a pout on her lips, the young woman pulled back the re-tangled line. This was the third time inside of ten minutes. She didn't even realize a line could get that tangled.] What am I doing wrong?
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[She had no idea what compelled her to pick up the bunny ears. And put them on.]
[They had just looked so...cute. Expertly crafted, with fur that was so soft, she'd been tempted to pet herself. A silly notion which earned a quiet giggle. For nearly a minute, Iris was left amused at her new choice of headgear.]
[Until the affects took hold, and she found the world significantly larger than it had been moments prior.]
[She also found an irresistible urge to twitch her nose, tilting her head upward as she searched for signs of someone who might explain why she was suddenly a fluffy, white rabbit with black ears.]
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[She didn't get the reference.]
[The bunny ears, at least, might have almost made sense, if she stopped long enough to think about it. But what in the world did a pumpkin have to do with...with...]
[Admittedly, the dress was lovely. A shimmering shade of blue that actually suited her hair and fair skin. Although it wasn't the style she was momentarily concerned with:]
How am I supposed to move in this?
[It was the exceedingly poofiness of the skirt. Far more cumbersome than her usual uniform.]
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She'd play along, she supposed. She wasn't happy about that, either, but she could manage. She'd moved along fast enough before she finally saw a non-animal figure. It was her first instinct to put up appearances as soon as she could be observed. However, as she got closer, she realized she recognized that person.
She paused.
And then, coolly.]
Iris, what on earth are you wearing?
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[Her voice. Only not. Colder. The voice of someone who should have been dead. Permanently.]
[Eyes widened. An inaudible gasped escaped her lips, hand rising in vain effort to conceal it. Slowly, she turned around. Wondering--hoping--what she'd heard had merely been a figment of her imagination. Her mind playing some cruel trick on her. Her initial arrival had mentioned something about rescuing...backups of those who might have otherwise been lost...but she never thought...]
Dahlia?
[She blinked twice. But, no, the image of her twin sister continued to stare back at her.]
It can't be...
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But, where Iris knew her well enough, she knew that in this moment, she had nothing to fear. What a relief, of all the people she could have possibly met.]
Sister, don't look so shocked. We were both told the same things, though I had hoped I'd have a little more time to calm myself. It was quite an ordeal, after all.
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[Things changed when her sister had tried to kill Phoenix. An innocent boy whose only crime was being at the wrong place at the wrong time. Someone that, against her better judgement, Iris had come to care for so very much. And it wasn't even the fact that Dahlia tried to poison him. It wasn't the fact that she'd killed her ex-boyfriend and subsequently tried to pin the crime on Phoenix.]
[It was the fact that she'd acted without telling Iris what she was doing.]
[For the first time in their lives, she'd left Iris out in the cold.]
Dahlia...
[This time, however, it had been Iris who'd left her sister behind. All of Dahlia's crimes of the past had finally caught up with her, and she'd payed the ultimate price. Not just with her life, but with her spirit. Ironically, at the judgmental finger of none other than Phoenix Wright himself.]
[Dahlia was supposed to be gone forever. Iris was supposed to have moved forward. Without her.]
But...you're dead. [Stating the obvious. Unless--] Is someone channeling you again?
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Are you serious? Do tell, who would be foolish enough to do that again? Ohhh, our sister Pearl?
[There was always a use to needling-- though Dahlia suspected, more than anything else, that Iris was in denial. They were so ready to be done with her. And to think, Dahlia herself had given up hope up until she woke up hours ago. There was so much nothingness, and it seemed unfair that of all the spirits, that she had to be aware of it for the rest of her existence.
Until she was picked up, as part of a "data corruption" sweep.]
I'm here the same way you are. Doing the same menial tasks, with my own body. It took a little time to get used to this again, but I'm not dead... at least not here.
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[Who would be foolish enough to do that again?]
[The sentiment certainly wasn't wrong.]
[Iris took a deep breath. Her head was swimming with all sorts of thoughts, but equally conflicted was her heart. The last she had seen of her dear twin, Dahlia's grabbed her by both shoulders and shoved her into the sacred cave, throwing up so many trick locks that it had taken all night for that woman, Miss Von Karma, and Sister Bikini to free her. All for trying to help Mystic Maya--for trying to help her, although she hadn't known Dahlia was in there at the time.]
[And if she had...? Would she still have undone those locks?]
[No, that wasn't even a question. Of course she would have. Because that's the kind of person Iris was. Would always be. Dahlia had betrayed her in nearly every way imaginable, but...Iris still loved her. She would always love her.]
[Even if she hated her right now.]
I wish I could say it was good to see you again...Sister.
[Her voice started out hard--almost as hard as Dahlia's--but it ended in a soft cadence. There was more than anger behind her words. There was also sadness. Regret.]
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Bonus A
With a weary sigh, Phoenix goes to sit down on a nearby rock. Then he smiles warmly as he sees the tiny bunny nearby.]
Hey there, little one! [He reaches one hand out and wiggles his fingers a little to try to beckon the rabbit closer.
A little pet or two could help to really take a load off! ...As long as this bunny doesn't try to eat me, too...]
Come on over. I won't hurt you, I promise!
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[First, some unseen force had managed to pluck her from her cell. Tossed her into a strange world with some halfhearted attempt at explaining why she was there and what she was supposed to do. Locals poking at her with sticks, goading her into entering this strange cave. Then, she was inexplicably transformed into a small animal.]
[And now...]
P-Phoenix?
[Her little bunny eyes widened. Instincts kicked in, and she hopped towards him. Not even stopping to think if this was some sort of cruel trick.]
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[He can't tell for sure, but something just gives him the feeling that this bun's a girl. It's a cute rabbit nonetheless! And he smiles warmly as he pets her between the ears.]
There, see? This isn't so bad, is it?
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[He was petting her. Phoenix. Her Feenie...and...it actually felt quite nice. That spot, right between her ears. A small shiver ran down her bunny spine each time his fingers brushed against that spot. She wanted him to keep going, so she nuzzled gently into his hand. Encouraging more pets.]
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Great! I know you'd like it. And I guess you want some more... Take that!
[He then presents some more rubs to that same spot.]
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[For perhaps another thirty seconds. Then...there was a strange flicker washing over her bunny form, until--]
[Iris was standing before him. Wearing the same set of bunny ears she'd picked up earlier. And a very surprised look on her face.]
--Oh!
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( III ) Hullo! :>
Allow me. ( She sighed, gesturing towards the rod. ) I might be able to help.
( Well, okay. Integra too had struggled with catching and cooking a fish, but there is strength in numbers... right???
She seats herself on the bank beside Iris, examining the rod closely. )
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Thank you.
[She watched the new presence carefully. Taking note of what she was doing differently.]
This 'game' of theirs must be affecting me. I've never had so much trouble with a simple task before.
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Even if she has the funniest way of showing it. )
Nor have I, to tell you the truth. ( What she emits next, is a most unnerving chuckle. ) But I wouldn't expect anything less of these bloody people.
( HER DISTASTE OF CERES IS VERY STRONG!!1 )
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[Iris shifted a little awkwardly in her seat. In spite of her kindness, there was something bout this woman that unsettled her greatly. Something she couldn't quite put her finger on.]
Bloody people? [Unfamiliar with the phrase, she could only furrow her brows in dark confusion.] Is someone injured?
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And well, she did not expect Iris to recognize her to begin with. )
Ah, no. I only meant to say that I... well, I do not think highly of our overseers-- the ones who created this 'game'.
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Why not?
[She could think of a number of reasons, but wanted to hear what she had to say, not put words into her mouth.]
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ii
Edgeworth has his own heavy hammerspace backpack, and has to sit down on a rock to catch his breath.]
You'd be surprised at what else you'll find in there.
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[Not a face she would have expected to encounter, but certainly not unwelcome. A warm, very un-Dahlia-like smile graced her lips, and she offered him a respectful nod of her head in greeting. Her mind was still filled with fond memories of the man. How he had helped her in one of her greatest hours of need. The conversations they'd shared, painful on her end but full of honesty and respect on his.]
It is a pleasure to see you again, despite the...unusual circumstances.
[She just hoped he didn't think she'd purposely escaped prison; the last time she'd run from him, it was only out of great concern for Mystic Maya. There would have been no excuse this time.]
May I ask what you've already found in your pack?
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He places his hands on his lap as he recalls that strange assortment of items he found in his bag.]
A watermelon, a cheese grater, a paper umbrella, several rusty knives, and a frayed, useless length of rope.
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[Quite an...interesting collection of supplies.]
Is the watermelon fresh?
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I was just wondering.
If it was fresh, then at least you would have something to eat.
[Optimism?]